Feb. 6, 2023

Fake News Jokes

From Sean Riker: 100 Percent Innocent and Sentanced to 200 Years by Sean Riker (author's profile)


By Sean Riker

More top secret Biden documents found, but this time in Sean Riker's supermax cell! Via our confidential source, Sean Riker was awake when he realized Biden infiltrated his cell at 2 AM and was giving him an unwanted-touchy-feely-shoulder massage!

Riker screamed, "Guard! Help me!" And Biden got close to Riker's ear and whispered, "This is happening!"

Riker relaxed and took it. When Biden finished his shoulder massaged, he turned to leave and said, "I left you some top secret documents on your desk so you can make origami cranes out of them."


Harry and Megan detail, in Harry's memoir, an altercation between Harry and Sean Riker over a leggo-my-Eggo tussle. With tears streaming down both their faces during a CNN interview, Megan says, "It was awful when Sean Riker wouldn't give up the waffle! Harry had fear all over his sweaty face! And in a surge of evil strength, Sean Riker ripped the Eggo out of Harry's grasp! Then Sean Riker pushed Harry to the ground just like Harry's older brother did when they were kids! Harry and I suffer from PTSD now! We HATE being in the spotlight, but we love money!"


Democrats hate babies so much that they passed a bill making it mandatory that once a baby is aborted, the doctor is required by law to put the aborted fetus back in the womb so it can be aborted a second time.


Sean Riker is a vampire and sleeps hanging by his feet from the rafters! Via a confidential source who is an expert in vampirology, we learned that because Sean Riker has brown hair and a red goatee, he is a vampire and wears slippers made from adorable puppy skins!


Every single media personality are honest, trustworthy, anti-transmoplifying, anti-hate mongerer, truthful, sincere, and saintly!


Systemic corruption is fake!


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