When Sex is Unhealthy

I know you looked at the topic and said, "What the world does she mean by that? Sex is good. I love it. I am all right." You may be all right, but the next person may not be. So we're going to go in a direction that is a little bit different.

Let me give you this important information first—taken from beyond shattered strongholds (addictions, deception, and denial) liberty savard. Promiscuous sexual mind/body agreement. The mind begins to think about sexual activity and communicates its mental arousal to the body which beings to feel arousal. The soul's attempts to appease its needs through sexual activity are first psychological, but they become physiological. Any time your soul finds a way to comfort itself and temporarily relieve its own pain is an act that exalts between you and your knowledge of what God can and wants to do for you. Even married sex that is primarily used to appease the soul's distress and pain is not a good reason for martial relations.

The mind is where the sexual though patterns begin. The enemy is often the originator of those thoughts because of the people, pictures, or words that he causes to be played out in your presence. He is very cunning about picking up on your body cues once he has tried to set you up. He understands a quickened heartbeat, a flushing of the face, and an immediate interest in what he has set up. Then he can pressure these addictive thought patterns with customized temptations to get them out. Sexual thought patterns are not surrendered to God become addictive.

The soul will also initiate sexual thoughts and desires if it has learned to comfort and pacify its own neediness this way. You can lose wrong patterns of sexual thinking. I will tell you later how to be freed.

So many times in relationships, many put sex before anything else in their relationship. Some have a balanced life with it, some don't. Don't get me wrong: sex is important in any relationship. But so often, in many cases, it's used in the wrong way.

My past boyfriends and I would get into a heated argument or some would abuse me. The first thing they wanted to is have sex afterwards. I always heard make up sex was the best. So that's what I based the situation on, thinking it was healthy sex. But it wasn't because what needed to happen with the argument situation? We needed to sit down and resolve those issues because the unmet resolution led to physical abuse in some of the relationships. Every time, they hit me. My ex-boyfriends would want to have sex. In one instance, I was almost choked to death. These ex-boyfriends used sex to relieve themselves of the distress and pain on the inside. They took their pain out on me.

Question is: are you that woman or man doing that to your mate? It's time to be free. This is also going on in marriages as well. Are you ready to be free of those secret demons you're wrestling with? It is time to be free.

Next subject I want to talk about is marital rape. The Bible says the marriage bed can't be defiled. But doesn't give the man or woman the right to take advantage of their mate in bed. Absolutely not. But it happens.

So men or women don't want to talk about what's going on with their mate. They think by releasing themselves through sex is going to relive the distress and pain. When you wake up, the same situation is there so you have done the same thing you did yesterday. That was wrong.

Let me tell you some examples. "Baby, why are you cheating on me?" The next thing you know, he or she is kissing you, ready to have sex. "Baby, why didn't you pay that bill and what did you do with the money?" Next thing you know, he wants to have sex. "Honey, I heard you are gay." Next thing you know, he or she wants to have sex. "Baby, are you doing drugs?" Next thing you know, he or she wants to have sex. The mate never wants to deal with anything. It's always sex because they know what they are doing is wrong, but they got to release the pain and distress of the situation through sex.

Some men and women think that if you're married to them, you've got to have sex no matter what the situation at hand that needs to be resolved. They hold you down and they take; they take from you after you told them "no." All of this is unhealthy sex that is used to appease the soul's distress and pain, which is not a good reason for martial or mate relations.

You can lose the wrong patterns of sexual thinking, but the success of playing this way is based upon praying as soon as you are aware of these thoughts and before you are tempted to act upon them.

Jesus, I thank you for giving me the keys of the kingdom so that I can stop the addictive wrong thinking that my mind pleasures itself with. I bind my mind to your mind, Jesus. I need your thoughts to help stabilize and steady my mind. I lose, smash, crush and destroy all wrong patterns of thinking that go through my head when I want to turn to any kind of sexual activity that distracts my soul from its distress. I will—I will continue to lose these thoughts until they cease. I will begin to think of things above, like the scripture says I should. I will not leave my mind unoccupied to start this cycle of wrong thinking again. Your word says that I should set my mind on things above, not on earthly things. Your words says that I should meditate on whatever things are noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, things of virtue, and things that are praiseworthy. I will do this so that my mind learns to meditate on goodly things. I will not leave my mind pondering the things of the earth that my soul keeps trying to comfort itself with. Thank you, Lord, for helping me to do this. Amen.

This is for the ones who have been suffering secretly for many years in this area. Deliverance is here for you. In order to welcome a problem, you must first admit there is one. We don't have to suffer. Sometimes our suffering comes through shame and embarrassment that someone is going to judge you. But little do we know the person next to you, across the street, down the road, over the sea, in the government, and so on, may have the same problem as you.

You're somebody special. It doesn't matter what he, she or they say. You deserve to be free, not depressed and sad because of the situation you have encountered. It's time to be free! Why? 'Cause you are somebody special.

Written by
Jennifer Johnson