Category: Featured

Book of Floyd

Chapter 1

On Jan 22, 1991 a parole board released me from Heman G. Stark youth training school in Chino, California,
to the custody of Pastor Danny Valenzeula of Peace in the Valley Ministries in Fontana California.

Hello, my name is Floyd Smith, known to most of you as Xzyzst (exist), the instigator of the @Golgatha
interview segments within the pages of the Write Or Die zine issues.

Having been involved i a lifetime assiciated with ministry in multiple capacities, 1991 was the first
time I had been sent to a MEN's home, especially a men's home setting in a bed and breakfast style
house that served courageous men that sought spiritual guidance for failing marriages, economic trouble,
drug and alcohol abuse, anger management, parental guidance, and then, there was guys like me from the
inner-city, beyond @risk, and finding my way in transition into adulthood.

In a nutshell, we all were in seminary conditions, being trained to lead a new generation to spread
the Good News of God's mercy.

After about 2 months in the home, I was moved to be th new roommate of brother Carlos Cabello. I viewed
Carlos as smarter than everyone at the home, just my personal opinion, so the move was a come up to me
because I got a chance to try to test Carlos to see if he was just running game, like most fake christians,
or was he the real deal, I even tempted Carlos with a physical fight one day, but I was trained to serve
the man of God, and Carlos proved that he was the real deal by not backing down.
(page 1 of 4 ends here)

I felt convinced that I could fall asleep and get some quality rest around Carlos as my past life was not so safe to fall asleep in the presence of a coward, I tested Carlos, and he proved to be both physicall and spiritually capable of convincing me that I was safe to get some quality rest.

Until one night, while watching a Benny Hen television broadcast, Benny Hen made a statement about Jesus hanging on the cross, I heard Carlos whisper the words:
"Awwwh that's good"

I said, "We know this story, Bro, what's good?"

Carlos said:
There's text within the text, a Message within the Message, here you've got Jesus being executed on the deathrow of that time, and you got these fellow deathrow prisoners having a conversation, and one of them tells the other that 'he doesn't belong there with them.'"

I was like, "Yeah, we ain't never heard that sermon, huh, (both laugning), you'd literally got to be on death row to even speak on that.

Carlos said:

"Imagine somebody, waiting for his death to kick in, with nothing to lose say something like that,? Awwh, that's good, what other information do need to believe 'Jesus was who people say he is no matter what the law said'!

Page 2 of 4

I wanted to share that story with those of you who ask why I chose to name our interview sessions @Golgotha or create nerve enough to suggest a comparison to Jesus.

As much as we have in common with Jesus towards the systemic methodology and world study of capital punishment, I wanted to highlight the ignored irony that most in society pay less attention to the uncensored words from conversations between condemned prisoners when there is no lights, cameras, or action.

Since the 4th Matthew in BC, as the Writer of the Book of Matthew, Matthew himself, in his capacity as an evangelist, disciple, and as Levi the tax collector, we don't see people like Matthew with the presence of Mind to also document the dialog and Chatter between condemned prisoners, yes talking amongst themselves, not to courts, nor to activist community or media.

To me it's important to state as a matter of factly, that even into circa 2018, a third of the condemned population don't belong on deathrow, in fact, when you engage the prisoner speaking, it offers me great pause to realize that for him to even conclude a disposition on Jesus, I'm convinced that he too did not belong on deathrow, considering that his own life was slowly escaping his crucified body, bringing my total to two thirds of condemned population to not belong on death row.

(Page 3 of 4)

Each of these conversations titled @Golgotha speak for themselves, as the reader goes into the dialog blind to content, the prisoners involved in these conversations are also engaging each other non-scripted, blind to the direction, source, or nature of the value of their own words to someone that may say to themselves in a whisper, "Awh, that's good."

Xzyzst (exist)