Date: 09 Nov 25
Subject: (Conclusion of: " What's In A Name " No...

(Conclusion of: " What's In A Name " Nov. 10, 2025)

Unfortunately, there are other nicknames for the people in uniform that aren't quite as acceptable. I'm sure you'll agree that the individuals they were appointed to had every right to be ticked off. I guess one of the most humiliating nicknames I've heard belonged to a guard who had a real bad acne problem. His face always had fresh pimples, and scars from previous ones. So someone came up with the idea to call him, "Pizza Pizza" (from the Little Caesar's Pizza commercial).

Then, there was the innocent looking. . . kid, who looked like he MAY have just gotten his drivers license. I guess since his appearance resembled that of a bag boy, he was always called, "Winn Dixie." (Down south, Winn Dixie is a very well known grocery store.)

I would imagine the nickname, "Truck Driver" wouldn't seem all that embarrassing. Oh, I'm sorry. Did I mention she was a female? A female who you could not tell was a female unless you. . . Well, let's just say it took some investigation. None of her rolls seemed to be in the right places, she has a buzz cut, and she also chewed tobacco. She was definitely someone I would not have wanted to meet in a dark alley -- or a well lit one for that matter.

In another example, where gender was difficult to decipher, the show, "The Adams Family£ once again came through with the answer: "Cousin It." Some real hairy beast type thing that came to visit periodically.

Here in prison we have a term for when guards come in unannounced, and just start rummaging through our lockers looking for contraband -- it's knows as a shakedown. So when you have some female guard who carried out one of these searches on a regular basis, she could very well be given a nickname like, "Shakedown Sally." Or if she's just an overall ruthless little brute, looking for trouble in any kind of way, "Grandma Dynamite" seems to be an appropriate title.

Naturally, there are the nicknames with no form of originality or imagination. The designator obviously just uttered what they saw. Like for instance: "Tight Pants," "Big Sweaty," "Bow Legs," and "Back Arms." I mean, really. Do I need to do any explaining as to what must have brought about these new names for these unfortunate guards?

My last example has been my favorite ever since I first heard it. Unfortunately, you have to be familiar with a couple of movies to truly appreciate it. Or maybe you can just remember the commercials good enough to get a picture of the scene. Remember "Child's Play," and the sequel "Child's Play 2?" Well, I spent a few months at a camp where one of the sergeants had a nickname appointed to her in which I almost felt sorry for her. However, with her being such a mean looking, five foot nothing female, that had a leathery complexion, and a limp to her stride. . . Well, the nickname, "Bride of Chucky" seemed to be a fitting description in an original kind of way.

Sorry if I went a little overboard with this subject. I had no idea I would end up with so many pages. But you've got to admin, it's not like nicknames are just some kind of fad that just comes and goes in here -- the wide variety in the age of the guys I interviewed showed me that. And some of these guys will really take their name to heart -- even having it tattooed on their body. I can remember "Cowboy" and "Maze" having their nicknames tattooed clear across their shoulder blades. So I guess it can obviously be a serious subject to some people. Hopefully, you were able to find it at least a little interesting.

(Be sure to join me next week as I share with you the 10 most obvious indications that a prisoner is losing their mind in prison.)