Nov. 4, 2012

Daily Journal 10/5/12 To 10/7/12

by Ronald W. Clark, Jr (author's profile)

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Ronald W Clark Jr
October 5, 2012

DAILY JOURNAL
October 5-7, 2012

Friday October 5, 2012 5:48am. Just finished eating breakfast. Agan I was up at 3:30 but thankfully this time I go back to sleep. I got two letters in last night. Mom and Anne. I'll probably start letters to them today. Not sure what else I'll do. Just see how the day unfolds. Canteen won't be here this morning. It's really foggy out there, so they will have the institution on restrictive movement until the the fog clears out. I'm fixing to get up, make my bunk and clean the floor.

7:50am. I started a letter to my mom. Then I got up and scrubbed the walls and floor down. I'm waiting to get a scrub brush so I can do a better job on it. Hope they bring my property today. I've got some legal papers that I need and an order showing they need to be produced to the court. And if they abide by this order then they will go get my property. I can see out the window, and the fog is really bad. It probably won't burn off till 10am. Sgt. came through earlier said, "They finally let you out, now how long are you going to be able to stay out?" I said "hopefully forever". That Sgt is real cool. He's always been honest and up front. In fact he told me back in August I may have to deal with them falsifying DRs for 6 months or a year before they tske their foot off my neck and stop retaliating. But he was not expecting 90% of this administration to be leaving like this. And I believe that's the only reason I'm out. They had too much pressure on them from the Inspector General, the courts, the Feds etc. And they had no choice but to back off and stop the criminal conduct and unlawful activity that they were engaging in. They had been exposed for the low life criminals they are. Well, I'm going to talk, pace back and forth in my cage. Then decide what to do.

8:59am. Captain Swaine came on and ordered them to place me back in cell P-4102. Just more retaliation by another low life no good criminal. Well got to write the Inspector General.

11:21am. They're denying me my property. I'm so pissed off! These are a bunch of no good sorry a** criminals they have working here. I came close to starting a hunger strike. I'm seriously thinking about it. It's not what I want to do, but I'm sick of being handled this way by a bunch of no good scumbag criminals. Who some stupid S.O.B. gave a law enforcement job! These people are a step above moronic idiots! Brain dead morons! I just can't let them push me into killing myself. They may just be trying to do that.

1:03pm. Well, I've been told to pack it up. I'm being moved back to Six wing. Madness, pure madness! So damn crazy around here. Well, I'm sitting here ready to go, watch them change their mind again.

1:51pm. I'm back in cell P-6115. Everyone was like, what the hell is going on.

5:58pm. Well, I got my property and the canteen. Only reason all this happened is 'cause of our wing sgt. Who's a very good man with much honor and integrity. We are lucky to have him and the other officers we've got down here. Right now I'm having a cup of coffee, waiting on the showers and listening to my music. :) I love my damn music. Once I get my shower I'm going to come back and eat a beef stew.

7:34pm. Got my shower. I feel much better. I've got my fan blowing on me and listening to my music. I'm finally full. I didn't enjoy that beef stew like I thought I would. I've been looking forward to that meal for the longest time, and it just wasn't that good. This has been one hell of a day of ups, downs and ups again. But I'm going to have to get back on Prozac. I came close today to throwing in the towel. And I can't allow these people to push me into taking my own life, which I have a feeling is exactly how my life is going to end one day. One day I'll say that's enough and bring this life to an end. And I don't encourage suicide. Anyone who is thinking about it, they should go get some help. My life existence is different. I'm going to die in here one way or another. Death chamber, life without parole or suicide. I'm sure your situation can't be on the level of this. And just like today, had I not dug down deep and fought to stay above the temptation I wouldn't have realised that the situation was going to get better. Nothing lasts forever. So especially if you're young, fight to push through the hard moments, because they don't last forever. I'm going to lay back and relax, call it a day. And it's been one hell of a day.

Saturday October 6, 2012, 7.04am. I've been up since 4am. Washed clothes, made my bunk and been sitting here, tearing up old grievances and stuff I don't need. Which I'm going to be spending the day doing. I have to make sure everything in this cell fits into my locker, so I'm just listening to music and working. I drank too much coffee yesterday, so I'm only working on about 3 1/2 hours' sleep. 'Cause I didn't get to bed until about 12:30, I haven't even eaten breakfast. I've got it in a bowl. Soon as I eat, which is going to be shortly, I'm going to get back to work on throwing a lot of this stuff out. So let me eat and get to it.

5:14pm. I've been cleaning my lockers out all day. Just throwing away a lot of old grievances from from 3-4 years ago and other paper work that I don't need. Right now I'm watching the Florida Gator's [?] and Oklahoma Texas Tech. It's half time so I'm listening to music. I'm extremely tired. I'm ready for bed but I want to stay up and watch Miami and N.D. at 7.30pm. Don't know if I'll make it. I may have another cup of coffee and see if that will help. Coffee is the reason I couldn't get to sleep last night. It's nice having my fan back. Our new warden came through this morning with an assistant warden and a captain. I didn't talk to her. I'm trying to fly under the radar. She was asking guys how they were doing. Seem's nice enough. Well, I'm fixing to lay back down, watch the games, have a cup of coffee and see if I can stay awake.

Sunday October 7 2012 6:17am. I've been up since 4am, trying to figure out what I'm going to do. I've got a couple of letters to write. I'll watch some football later today. I just glanced down at my date book that I have here in front of me and that I just got back with my property Friday, and it was turned to the week of May 6-12, and I was just thinking of everything I went through. Pisses me off to even think about it. I was noticing - or thinking - about all the property these unlawful correction officers stole from me. But I've just got to walk away from this - leave it alone. No matter how much I want to fight to change this corrupt system, I'm just not going to continue to suffer alone. I wish the FDOCs would take the T.Vs, canteen and visits. Then these sorry ass inmates would get off their stinking sorry asses and write and fight for the change we need. But that's not going to happen. I hate it - but I can't do anything about it.

4:54pm. Just been watching football. I got to see the Dolphins play. We got dinner, I didn't eat. I was still full from the meal I made earlier. I'm just listening to some music. I've got some writing to do, but I may wait until tomorrow. I just cleaned the floor. I think I'm going to wash up, get in bed and call it a day. I am extremely tired. I feel worn out. I'm going to call it a day.

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arcadiaego Posted 11 years, 4 months ago. ✓ Mailed 11 years, 4 months ago   Favorite
Hi Ronald - sounds like you are the victim of some drama at the moment. I'm new to this site so I'm not in the know about your previous letters and diaries - what is happening with the administration at your jail? It sounds pretty shoddy.

You have some very good advice about keeping going through the bad times. I've had some problems with depression myself, but I don't know how you manage in your situation. Hope you are doing well at the moment.

Best wishes,

Elizabeth-Anne.

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