@Golgotha w/ Prose & Conz
By: Xzyzst

For a few months now, Piankhi has been saying that he wants the Write or Die Zine Project to produce an all poetry issue.

How perfect is it that California death row inmates now have access to a creative writing poetry group that we call a class because we learn so much, and one of the mental health care staff, a sista we all call "Ms. Pam", facilitates the poetry group, literally in a classroom located below the surface of San Quentin State Prison.

For many years, condemned inmates was not allowed to participate in educational programs in the prison, now, a new generation of inner city youth being housed on death row in California have gathered, "in class", in tribute of Ms. Pam, in an effort to say "thank you" for bringing, and returning her poetry sessions to Condemned Row.

Today is also a time to conduct an @Golgotha style session because Ms. Pam is not here, and we have a substitute facilitator who has agreed to allow us to plot this surprise salute to our sista Ms. Pam as we plan to present her with a full autographed copy of the Write or Die Zine Project's "Prose and Cons" issue.

I began the cipher by reading a poem that was composed by one of our own titled "Persevere", I told everyone that I would reveal the name of the author at the end of the session, after my recital of "Persevere", the discussion @Golgotha continued:

Enjoy your reading!

10.31.13

Glen: That's tight, it speaks to like, the heart of what the problem is, especially around this place because it gets real easy to get caught up in negativity, and the thing about this class is we get to vent, and go all over the world with just conversations that inspire all types of poetry and writings and I'm just glad to see you youngsters shine and feel like, a part of the growth.

Piankhi (speaking under his breath): You are a part of it.

Battle: There's a part of that poem about fire, each one of us have a different fire and light that eventually comes out in all of us, probably even more for us on death row or who are in these kinds of situations, but everybody has different ways to express their own individual fire, and as far as this class goes, it's like a safe haven that is set in a different environment and setting where fire can both burn and purify without anybody feeling restrained.

BG: That's why I love to use those terms like fire, burn.

Glen: Purification.

BG: Yeah, exactly, because fire, when used in the right way, can be used to clean certain foods from impurities and all kinds of stuff, both positive and negative, spirituality, your organs and nervous system can all be affected by burning energies, especially when, or for those that hit that abyss, and when it becomes harder to come back out of those states of mind.

Xzyzst: Speak to the energy shift on death row, like, this morning for instance, somebody said something over the wire that was foul, but knowing that I was about to come over here with y'all, I didn't allow for this death row energy to fuck up my...

BG: People come along like Issa, Scheuderie, D. White, Dixon, Zimmerman, Valentine, Cleaves, Corby, Pam and a few others, it's just certain ones that you meet that you know right away that this person is here for the better reasons and are trustworthy and ain't all caught up in the bullshit around here.

Bugg: Yeah, because it's noticeable too. (everybody in agreement)

BG: See, you can take one moment of a person's character and be blinded by negativity because you miss out on your blessings by judgment, don't get me wrong, we all measure and judge, it's in our nature, math, history, you name it, but sometimes when we misjudge people due to small moments of negativity, we can easily miss the blessings of people like Pam who facilitates this poetry class. You see, I'm glad Piankhi is doing this so now Pam, and all of them can see that they are important in more ways than we can express, at least, those of us that do.

Xzyzst: Last week, I noticed that our Jewish bro held off on what you was originally going to say, so, this is for Smith, how important was it for you when the OG was like, "Speak your mind because..."

Glen: I felt it was important for you to know that we're all one up in here and...

Xzyzst: Exactly, and I'm glad you did speak out. My question is do you feel, because of your racial diversity that you are like...

Smith: No, I thought it was important, see, to me, it doesn't matter because I don't look at race, we're all the same to me, I like it in here, but when I speak my mind, I get into trouble sometimes, so I...

Glen: I wasn't going to let you just not, do you, man, you can help me save my life, or lace my kids just by what you say, we help ourselves and each other when we speak our minds, so I'm glad you decided to say what you wanted to say because you gave us more insight into the reality of the situation.

Bugg: I also wanted to say something about the quality of the conversations in this class, you know, while the guys was talking, I was sitting here, and I just wrote this: reciting:

"Accusations by society...
Can be unfounded,
In honor of Ms. Pam
Our facilitator
Who helps us stay grounded."

(group applause)

People have heard about this class, and in a good way, people are talking about it, an' BG, you know how it can be, because we was celled next door to each other, how sometimes people can look at the mental health program in a...

BG: Stigmatizing way...

Bugg: Or however it plays out in their minds, like, making comments.

BG: Oh yeah, especially when they call it out over the unit P.A. system, you hear all of that, staying in what they know, in a state of ignorance, scared of embracing change, they don't realize that change will smack your ass in the face, so when me and you would talk to each other, others in the area would rather we talk about all of the negative bullshit that's going on, or the negativity that they be putting out there, man, we don't want to sit up and talk about bullshit all day, and for people like Piankhi, Wrinkles, Johnny Blaze and Banks, who was all in this class from day one, we all carry the positive energies with us...

Xzyzst: Instead of walking around here all miserable. Piankhi is sitting right here, so let me ask you about your mind state when you decided to do an all poetry zine?

Piankhi: Man, I'm just a fly on the wall, y'all pretty much got this covered, but what I will say is that, now that I've been in here, I've learned that Ms. Pam is not how I had perceived her to be before when I saw her in passing, in the unit, I see her totally different now.

Xzyzst: Now, I'm going to tell y'all who wrote "Persevere", Wrinkles wrote this piece, and it's a good thing that he and Pam both are not here today because I want him to receive his surprise blessing as his work was for us and this @Golgotha cipher.

(Entire class applauding the work of Wrinkles.)

Piankhi: Yeah, I wanted to put "Persevere" in WOD issue #4, but I'm glad it was done like this now that I can see how this turned out.

Xzyzst: As soon as I read it I automatically knew, that what greater way can we hold up our sista Pam, the facilitator of our poetry class, than to do it @Golgotha, while highlighting the work of one of her own poets. I've learned a lot about myself and others just by being in this class and supporting your ideas about the WOD zine project, from my own work, to guys like Battle, who sent me a piece he wrote about his daughter, I had no idea the level of...

Glen: Heat?

Xzyzst: Yeah, the level of heat he was coming with...

BG: Can't nobody say Piankhi ain't doing nothing, or being productive, a lot of youngsters don't realize the freedom of creative writing like this, perseverance, aspirations, inspiration, the vision of positivity, all that comes with the developmental process of mental stability in places like this, Piankhi understood early.

Xzyzst: The mental health program is no longer operating on the 1980s model, this is a new generation all the way around, it takes a strong solid mind to take advantage of every opportunity to rise above any fall. Nobody can deliver a worthy critique of something they have not experienced, and most often, experience can be our greatest teacher. Thanks, Pam, for this experience, we dedicate this issue to you.