Daily Journal December 17-20, 2012

Monday December 17, 2012: 5:49am: Got up at 4:20am, cleaned up. Just ate breakfast a few minutes ago. It was 2 pancakes if you can call them that. They were paper thin and tiny. Them guys in the kitchen are just sorry. They're too focused on what they can steal and sell than on cooking. That's what happens when you're relying on slave labor, a stolen product. The media is still all over that school shooting. I wish they would not cover it like this, 'cause I'm afraid this is going to produce copycats. I think the media is a major problem with these shootings. I'd gladly give my life for any one of them kids or women. I glanced up at the TV which is sitting here on my desk and E.T. Entertainment Tonight was showing a commercial on the school shooting. That coverage is screaming look all you nobodies, want to be famous? Want the world to know your name? Well get a gun and start killing people! The media has a responsibility to cover the story, but I think it should be handled differently. I can't even watch the coverage without bursting into tears. I did it yesterday during the NFL when Jane Brown was talking about it during the pre-game show. Just heartbreaking every time I see and hear about it.
10:43am: Just been laying around listening to music. Can't stop thinking about those women and children, and I can't seem to write a letter which I really need to do. I really need to get back on Prozac.
3:47pm: The guys came back in from recreation. I've just been laying around. I fell asleep listening to my music about 2pm. Hasn't been a good day for TV, they keep talking about that school shooting. I can't take it, it's just so damn heartbreaking. They need to do away with guns. Putting a ban on semi automatic weapons, background checks etc is garbage. 'Cause you can buy those guns in the newspaper. Americans are never going to give up their guns. We're too violent over here. And the NRA will spend hundreds of millions of dollars to keep guns in the hands of people. I think police officers and active military should be the only ones to possess guns and those should be kept secured where criminals and the mentally ill cannot get them. Oh well - doesn't matter, it'll never happen.

Tuesday December 18, 2012 5:33am: Just waiting on breakfast which is here right now.
6:03am: Finished eating. I put the potatoes away. I'm going to make me a fish stew later. I really need to do some writing. I need to stay away from the news. First thing that came to my mind this morning as soon as I opened my eyes was those dead kids and the families that are burying them this week. When I hear the preachers, rabbis etc talking, I get angry. And I'm going to leave that alone right now. I've got to stay under my music and stay away from all that 'cause if I'm not mad, I'm in tears. Which just happened only thinking about the crap. Damn! Them guns need to go, all of them! They have a stupid son of a bitch over here in Jacksonville, shot and murdered a 17 year old kid 'cause they were playing their music too loud. Now he's trying to get up under Florida's retarded ass stand your ground law. These guns need to go. And these NRA members who disagree, you walk up to that little 6 year old girl or boy, and say sorry but my gun is more valuable than you living, growing up and having a life. Stupid ass gun nuts, who puts more value on them having a gun than the life of a child.
9:58am: I wrote one letter this morning. Just finished eating a fish stew. It was really good. I was sitting here doodling on this paper. That bird sucks. I just do it sitting here thinking. I was going through my mp3 music catalog of songs that I'd like to get. I'm staying away from the TV today. Just not good for me. I'm going to try to get a couple more letters written. Just pass the day - the best way I can.
2:12pm: Just been wasting time. I need to write a couple of letters. I got a card last night from my attorney asking about coming up to see me. I'm just not interested. She can do what she wants with the case, I just don't care any more. Why should I, I lost the best years of my life in this cage. I'm not interested in growing old in prison. I'm not interested in slave labor. I'm tired of the loneliness, despair and everything else that goes along with this stinking sorry life. Oh well.

Wednesday December 19, 2012 4:12am: Got up at 2:42am, couldn't get back to sleep. I got in bed early yesterday... just down in the dumps. I got to snap out of this. I do feel a bit better this morning. I'm going to try to get some writing done and just see how the day plays out. I spoke with Captain Norman yesterday about 3pm. He said four months, keep it up, speaking of me not having a DR. I like this captain. He seems to be a man of honor and integrity, which is something we really lacked with that other low life corrupt criminal ass administration of Warden Barry V. Reddish. It's nice to see a change in the tide. I've already made my bunk and cleaned the cell, so I'm going to start a letter before breakfast.
6:27am: Just finished shaving and then cleaned the walls, cell bars etc. I started a letter this morning, which I'm fixing to get back to.
2:49pm: I did manage to write a letter this morning. Since then - I've just been laying around. I'm listening to my music and just passing another day away. Tomorrow canteen should be here. One of the canteen men is in quarantine. Actually his whole dorm is quarantined, there's a flu going around. I just hope it doesn't make it over here. And the problem is, is they have officers working in that dorm, then association with other officers and inmates, so in actuality it's a B.S. quarantine.

Thursday December 20, 2012 4:29am: Got up at 3:00am. Just made the bunk, I'll clean the floor after breakfast. Don't have any TV stations coming in so can't watch the news. So I'm sitting here listening to music. I need to write a couple of letters today. We're losing our wing sgt, I hate that. He's a really good sgt. They're moving him to O-Dorm, I'm here in P-Dorm. We may wind up with a real sorry sgt, I hope not. Tonight is the last night for our sgt. Monday Dec 24, we will find out who they assign to us. Hope for the best, expect the worst. Well, today is the last day of the world, and if I believed that mumbo jumbo crap, I wouldn't be writing this. Nope - I'll wake up Saturday morning and continue to write. But I've seen so many people on the news whose been "preparing" for the world to end. If it's going to end, there's no way to prepare. 'Cause it ends. I don't understand people. So quick to grab on to these end of the world prophesies. I'm going to get going.
7:32am: They called yard a few minutes ago and they're pulling guys right now, and as I've told you time and time again I can't go because of former Warden Barry V. Reddish and his unethical dishonorable criminal conduct. The b- should be behind bars, and not in another institution as a warden. But Florida is full of a bunch of idiots who run the F.D.O.C.
9:39am: The plumber just fixed my sink. The hot and cold water both work now. It's taken them 2 months to fix it. I need to do some writing.
10:41am: The guys just came back in from rec. The mp3-man picked up my player at 10:03. I have 3 songs coming and just ordered some more. I know Keefe and the FDCO is making a killing off the mp3 program. It's a great scam they have going. $120.00 for an mp3-player that probably cost $30 if you were to buy it on the street. And then they charge $1.70 a song. They have a captive audience, and price gouging in the FDOC is permitted.
4:58pm: Cant came. I'm fixing me a meal right now. I've got a couple of cards to get out of here. I'm fixing to wrap it up and call it a day. Send these two cards out, eat, wash up and get in bed.

[drawing of a bird]