M812
6/15/20 Personal Journal

Some fishing, visiting Jennier's lighthouse sail out to sea. No matter how bad it is (the aloneness) I'll never lose hope, never gave up. We'll dance again someday out of there prison cells out on the dance floor. With tired eyes I've painted the old places I've come from with buget alone I don't remember seeing in my youth. head a poem you like out loud, perferally one of mine. The words and images will soothe your heart. I grab a pencil sometimes and sketch, doodle something peaceful and/or funny such as a caricature of my friend and love ones. It doesn't have to be perfect, just something you like that makes people smile own laugh.
I saw the Dermatologist this week- he said I have Basal Cell Caranoma (skin cancer BCC) he's having a biopsy sone then he'll call me back to check for any more sites- then they'll operate :) He gave me a stack of paperwork- all the meds I'm taking and a lot of follow up appointments with a lot of specialists. I will see the R.N. in a day or two- hopefully she'll be able to explain it all to me.
6/10/20 Wed- I was going to write something down here this morning but my mind keeps wondering not staying on one subject or in one place for to long. I'm looking for something here but I'm not sure what it is. I have butterflies in my stomach but I'm not sure why. The sun has already hit my window almost blinding me. Where do I go from here. I'm painting another boat I've painted befor- I'm just having trouble finding anything that catched my eye lately. It's like my poetry, one line I write I love you on the next line I'm writing on the bottom.
6/11/20 I had a hard time getting up this moving, night sweats + chills, stomack's upset so I'm coming down with something- I just had something over the last weekend. I'm wearing this heavy long sleeve shirt out putting it on and taking it off. I would like to say it's the food but I rarely eat any of the food here you wouldn't either if you saw the place it was prepared in and how it's prepared :) Saw the R.N. yesterday she tried to explain what's going on- she's going to bring me in to see the doctor as soon as the paperwork from the Dermatologist get here he has to be the one to order the biopsy the put me back in to see the Dermatologist. I need for this shut down to ends so I can get outside and exercise more but we're being told that's not going to happen until the end of the year or later.
6/12/20 I want to say Happy Birthday to my Stevie, Carol & John. The years pass by so fast. I will see you all someday in a better place I promise I will be a better father.