March 4, 2021

Personal journal 1/7 to 2/20; Poetry; Love Note

by Steve J. Burkett (author's profile)



Personal Journal

1-7-2021 Sunday
There is a smile on my face this morning I'm feeling better. I had a couple of weeks where I was feeling in bad shape. Upset stomach, bone & muscles all hurting, I could have used some oxygen more than once. Yesterday morning I lost my breath. I'm going to take things real easy today. Yard was canceled in the morning so I tried a little painting I'm working a lot of detail in the indian I've been working on for 3 or 4 months. Line - finger doesn't seem to want to push the brush in the direction I need it to go :) and my eyes are not following :) I'm getting it, slowly, but I'm still enjoying watching it come into being. Back on quarantine starting at noon yesterday. Someone gave a dirty test. We're being tested two, three times a week if we're not giving a bad test for 3 week then someone's test is dirty where the hell did he get it? A guard, a nurse, a false positive. We were told when we first went on lockdown last March we would most likely be down until the end of the year maybe the end of '21 :)
1-11-2021 Thursday
I received a birthday card from my Jeannie today. The post-mark on it was dated Dec. 18th :). My celly got a couple of X-mas cards date Dec. 17th. The whole idea behind Pony Express was to get mail delivered within 30 days. I've been trying to call you. I'm signed up for 6:30 tonight. They're signing us p for phones right now trying to get everyone a chance to call home -time slots-. Being locked up all the time I'm finding very little to write about. I need to be out and about doing things to stimulate my mind - excite my brain. MY mind is turned off so much I even have trouble articulating a love note or expressing myself in a poem. It should be easy to put my love into words - to give clear and effective my thought of my feeling of you. One day this Covid will be over and we will find ourselves walking together on a riverbank with a summer wind blowing at our back listening to the sounds of love.
2/13/2021 Saturday
The rain has slowed almost to a stop this morning. I went out to see the skin cancer doctor all the way down to Handford. It rained most of the way down there and back I love riding in the rain - the lecter was on working well, classic rock on the radio. The only sound were the radio the sounds of the rain hitting the van and the tires on the highway. There are eight seats in the back of the van but I'm always the only one in it. I enjoyed old memories of riding in the rain my Jeannie beside me, arm lightly around my neck - there may have been tears 2/13/2021 of happiness - for sure there were tears. We were running late so we didn't get to go too far off the track - the guards told me that maybe next time we'll get in some sightseeing. We did go through Rockford even stopped for gas.
2/15/2021 Monday morning :) The rain's coming down hard. I've been sleeping in a lot the last few months. I woke up early today smiling. I'm not tired and I feel good. I sit here until 5 o'clock watching the rain coming down - hitting my window and running down. Then I washed up brushed my teeth, made a cup of coffee got my writing :) stuff out. I happy I was able to talk to my love for V-day, just thinking about her makes me happy. I'm having a little trouble with my writing brain's not working with my hands they hurt a little bit but not enough to keep me from writing :) Our mail is running about 6 to 8 weeks behind here because of a shortage of staff due to Covid, everything here is due to Covid:_. Right now I'm rewriting everything. I'm going to stop and enjoy the rain and the smile I see on your face, Old & Lost...
2/17/2021 I went out yesterday morning to Stockton for my throat. I'm still having a lot of trouble - choking on my food even with the diet I mostly just eat oatmeal in the mornings, apple sauce, pudding, jello, and a lot of boost - the stuff they mix in for me taste worse than it looks and it's running all over everyone else's food :) Looks clear outside right now. It was foggy on the drive yesterday it didn't take long for the van to warm up. No matter what the weather like I think I would enjoy the ride - a taste of freedom. It cleared p by noon and we took back roads back - this one road about 10 or 15 miles long had about 20 wineries along it. I couldn't get the guards to make any stops for looking :) :) a lot of nice ranches hidden on these back-country roads. I also got my second shot. The Moderna vaccination. Hopefully, now I don't come down with the Covid - fever and fewer people seem to be getting it. With all the people who've come down with it (most not even getting sick and all the people who have had the vaccination we should be getting close to going back to normal.)
2/21/21 I'm running out of words so I'm going to get this in the mail and start anew. I want to thank everyone for the work they're doing here keep yourself healthy. My love, I will try to call again soon. I have been feeling not too badly lately. The sky is clear and daylight is near.

Love Note
My Dearest Love:
2/20/2021 You are the one that warms my heart on these cold winter days. There is a storm blowing in from the east, carrying in heavy rains with strong winds blowing in all directions freezing snow high in the mountains. There was a time I worried about the storms knocking me to my knees. Now I have you enduring the storms with me. On a fast ride moving down the freeway in the rain holding on to one another going nowhere, nowhere is where we wanted to be with the wind blowing the rain hard against our windshield, windshield wipers moving to the beat of some oldie song you were singing, hot air blowing from the car's heater, cool air and a little rain blowing in from a broken wing window reminding me of an old Ford we had when we were always going somewhere, my love. As long as we are moving together with love in our hearts and the same song on our lips. As long as we are moving together we're moving the right way and someday we'll get to where we're going together in one another's arms wherever it is we'll be there together. There is no greater love than carrying the same dreams.
I'll Love you always
Forever & Ever
Your Steve


They wore strips
in the old days
not just on their clothes

Dee Willie
was in prison then
my brother Tim and I
Share a cell once

Willie and I
share a cell
in old Folsom
Joey was in Folsom with me

Allen and I rode the bus together
more than once
Little Allen was here
with me for a while

Grampa Jackson did time in MO
with Frank James
it's nice to have family
to talk to. 2/16/21
Steve Burkett


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