June 14, 2012

I Wrote This Years Ago

by Cody Robinson

At night I can sit with my head on the bars
My face to the window as I look to the stars
I turn the light off and I hope no one sees
A trembling of eyelids and these tears that I bleed

Just one of so many with so many alone
Concrete and steel, we call insanity home
Our tongues become whips and our fingers are fists
Longing for love where it can never exist

I search for an answer in the blackness of night
A fragment of peace on the edge of my life
A star is an angel shooting 'cross the skies
If only for a moment, 'til it crashes and dies

If you could go back, what would you change
If you could retract all of your biggest mistakes
And put it all back in its original place
And not interact with this whole vision of hate

If you could start over with a smile in your heart
And go back to the day when it all split apart
Began to unravel as it fell to the floor
Until you didn't even know who you were anymore

A day and a night, a stain is my life
Passing me by just like a bullet in flight
All I ever wanted was some place to be mine
A moment of triumph in these anguishing times

All I have left for myself is my pride
And I'll carry that inside until the day that I die
Driven by the guilt and the fear that I hide
I just hope someday I can die dignified

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Replies (10) Replies feed

Mesoforney Posted 11 years, 10 months ago.   Favorite
Beautiful

Cody Robinson Posted 11 years, 10 months ago.   Favorite
Thank you. I give my best every time I write.

Steffee Posted 11 years, 7 months ago.   Favorite
Your words are powerful....they say so much in just a few words.I am not sure what to ask you.What is your day like?

Cody Robinson Posted 11 years, 7 months ago.   Favorite
Actually, Steffee, I got released from federal prison a few months ago. Now I'm just another joe slogging it through the daily grind in another small city. I've been meaning to post some blogs about life after prison, but things are so hectic when you're fresh out of the joint that you can barely keep your head on straight.

I'd be happy to talk to you about what life was like while I was in, though. There's so much to say that it wouldn't be prudent to discuss it here. Feel free to email me if you wish. smalltownbassist@gmail.com

I'm also open to texting if you're located in the United States. Just let me know when and if you decide to email me.

Thank you so much for your kind words. It's comments like yours that make me want to keep going.

Nicki Posted 11 years, 7 months ago.   Favorite
Cody, are YOU trying to pick up women on this site!? ;D

Cody Robinson Posted 11 years, 7 months ago.   Favorite
What!? I don't need to pick up women ANYWHERE! I got one already. :P

j.torsrud Posted 11 years ago.   Favorite
Cody,
I enjoyed your beautiful and powerful poem. It brought tears to my eyes. My son is serving a life sentence in Wisconsin for a crime he committed when he was 16. He is able to survive by writing blogs and books. When (if he is releases) after serving at least 35 years, he will have no family or friends left to help him. This is a very cruel justice system, the worst in the "civilized world." I publish his blogs on the internet. He has written a lot about prisons and the political justice system. I'm sure he would like it if you were interested in reading his work. Could I send you e-mails with the links to his published work? I have, smalltownbassist@gmail.com. is that right.
I hope you are doing well on the outside. You have a very good mind. I wish you the best of luck.

Nicki Posted 11 years ago.   Favorite
J Torsrud, although your message was directed to Cody, I would be very interested to read your son's blog. I am a student in Australia and use these wonderful resources whenever I can in my studies. I also have a very close friend serving a JLWOP sentence in Arizona. I have found in my studies that the voices of those incarcerated are what is missing in the big picture of the criminal justice system and I'm very interested to hear your son's perspective.

Nicki

j.torsrud Posted 11 years ago.   Favorite
Thank you for your message. My son's name is Phillip Torsrud. One of his most popular blogs is Prison PTSD
www.healthmad.com/mental-health/prison-PTSD.106218
Hope you find it interesting. He will be very happy to receive any comments from you. Let me know if you would be interested in corresponding with him.

Cody Robinson Posted 10 years, 7 months ago.   Favorite
I was laying in bed last night when I suddenly realized I hadn't even THOUGHT of BTB in months. J Torsrud,I would be happy to correspond with your son, at least for awhile. If you still can, please contact me at smalltownbassist@gmail.com so we can set something up. And don't ever give up. Never.

Cody

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