Oct. 14, 2012

Write Or Die

From Write or Die by Byron Wilson (author's profile)

Transcription

WRITE OR DIE

Papyrus Collective
California Death Row

deathrowinmate.org

South Chicago ABC
Zine Distro
P.O. Box 721
Homewood, IL 60430

PapyrusCollective
WRITE OR DIE

Introduction

Several months ago, the Brothers at the San Quentin SHU/Deathrow contacted me about collaborating on a zine project as part of an educational outreach networking project they were developing. This included social networking with email, Facebook, Twitter, a website and so forth.

This was right around the time that the first of two waves of hunger strikes, spearheaded by the SHU prisoners over at Pelican Bay was getting ready to become a very important reality. I was part of the support group, working behind the scenes, for that seminal series of actions. I knew these Brothers at San Quentin would involve themselves with that struggle, as they are victims of clinical state torture, too.

So, we all had a "lot on our plates" mentally at that time. But, I KNEW this would prove to be a very fruitful and productive collaboration, once we had the time to focus on it. I immediately told them I was down for the zine aspect of their initiative, which will actually flower into a series of zines. After all, that's what I do - collaborate with conscious prisoners on zines and make them available to whoever wants to learn from them - not least of who is myself! I got into this whole zine distro thing in the first place because I wanted to learn and (hopefully) become comrades with those brilliant thinkers on the frontline trenches - the brilliant prisoners who have not only attained consciousness under brutal conditions but who also have the courage to share their wisdom with their fellow captives.

I'm a prison abolitionist because I detest crime. This may sound odd. You may say, "People are in prison because they have committed crimes!" I do not condone criminal behavior, whether perpetrated by an individual or carried out by bureaucrats following the orders and laws of a criminal state. Incarceration is composed of kidnapping and imprisoning, in this society under brutal and seemingly endless conditions. It "solves" NOTHING! It is mass criminality, on a daily basis by the state, protected by "law".

You don't pour gas on a fire and you don't rehabilitate people by torturing them and brutalizing them - and then spitting them back into society with little or no options to fashion a legitimate life.

As for death row, this is the ugly bed sore of a diseased society. How the hell does this society claim the right to slowly torture people - and then put them to death??? Oh yeah, I forgot - the Constitution says so. Well, to this day, the Constitution still insists that prisoners are nothing more than legal slaves! Read the 13th Amendment - and then read what these articulate Brothers write.

- Anthony Rayson -

TABLE OF CONTENTS

1.) Carry on Tradition 3-7
2.) The Road to Solidarity 8-9
3.) Guilty 10-11
4.) Through Your Eyes 12
5.) Request Denied 13
6.) New Generation, Part 1 & 2 14-18
7.) New Generation, Part 3 (Community Letter) 19-24
8.) Memo To: Prison Industry Captives 25
9.) Request Denied (cont'd) 26
10.) At Golgotha: The Place of the Skull 27-33
11.) Reaching Out 34-35
12.) The Ninth Ground 36-38

Papyrus Collective

Agitation Education

Prisoners
Anarchism
Abolitionism
Feminism

Write or Die is FREE to all prisoners through South Chicago ABC Zine Distro. You can locate titles of hundreds of prisoner zines, resource guides, information and education for the incarcerated. Request your catalog today.

Write to: Anthony Rayson, S. Chicago ABC Zine Distro, P.O. Box 721, Homeland, IL. 60430. (anthonyrayson@hotmail.com)

While the materials you select are free, do your best to pledge the postage to cover your requests. Every Stamp Counts!

Learn the explosive truth from the gulags, both inside & out! ZINES

Much like Ajamu, there are many other positive examples behind these myriad walls, but none have captured the minds, hearts, and interest of the outside world quite the way he did. Not long before Ajamu's passing, he tendered an endorsement which confirmed that he recognized the potential in the growing number of new generation prison youth. He acknowledged this in a local public interview and radio broadcast. There are indeed others here like himself.

It came as no surprise to us who "overstand" the nature and intent of the system when his appeals for clemency were denied. In spite of what good he had accomplished and could've continued to do, Ajamu's life was not spared. We're talking about a man who had changed his life so dramatically, that he had been nominated for The Nobel Peace Prize. Why?

As a prerequisite to granting clemency, the "then" state governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, stated that prisoners must not only confess to crimes but in Ajamu's case, it was openly expressed not only by the governor but by prison officials, that the state's version of change or redemption, included a relentless and degrading campaign, one that attempted to force Ajamu to "debrief" - in other words; become a prison snitch.

I don't know much about other prisons, but the snitch culture is very much alive and well, thriving even here on death row. When Ajamu focused his energy on helping my generation to develop this positive and progressive mentality, all the state wanted to do, was break and dishonor him; to have him implicate others in illicit activity. True to form, they'd have been far more satisfied with a lie than any efforts to prevent our youth from coming to prison to die.

Further significant in this final struggle of Ajamu's, was the unmitigated double standard and bigotry of the standing governor/state that was exposed in their condemning the references of admiration expressed by Ajamu in his book, to: Malcolm X, George Jackson, Geronimo (Jijaga) Pratt, and Assata Shakur. The governor further justifies his denial of Ajamu's clemency to the public through the villainous epithet of these venerated leaders of the civil rights and black liberation movement of the 60's and 70's, individuals who've inspired hope and COURAGE in a generation to fight for dignity; the dignity and freedom of EVERY human being.

The very fact that these leaders, held in such regard in the history of most African-Americans, were assassinated, imprisoned, and/or driven into exile for speaking out against racism, classism, unjust wars, and the social and economic injustices of their era, I expected some kind of response from self-appointed leaders like Al Sharpton, the NAACP, etc to the offensive remarks made by the governor. Sadly, it seems to have went over OUR heads, or was simply ignored.

However, in an article published in The San Francisco Bay View Newspaper after Ajamu's execution, I was delighted to find an address to the community, authored by one of Ajamu's close comrades, Ajani. It included a swift response to the governor's ignorant remarks.

(Ajani)

"This pattern of criminalization and vilifying black leaders and personages is an old one... The retaliatory targeting of prison writes has a clear objective: to intimidate and discourage those voices willing to expose violations of basic human rights, and the degrading conditions in prison."

It is relevant to mention that this subsequent article was one of a series of published articles he has co-authored in response to the ongoing harassment by prison officials, aimed at disrupting their writing projects. Not only had he and several other individuals been isolated in the Adjustment Center at San Quentin (death row's Security Housing Unit - SHU) just days prior to the December 13th, 2005 execution of Ajamu, but over the past six years they've (prison officials) kept them there. On the allegation of conspiracy to assault staff in retaliation to the execution, staff continues their protracted targeting of these men. For what? For expressing themselves with the same truth and courage as our late ancestors did. They face threats of "gang validation", long-term isolation, disruption of their mail, cancellation of visits, cell searches, and confiscation of personal property.

For decades, prison officials have exercised the arbitrary and illegal use of practices like indeterminate solitary confinement in Security Housing Units (SHU's), physical and psychological torture, "jacketing", character assassination, informants (snitches) and the above-listed threats of "gang validation" as repressive strategies to bridle outspoken activism and the influence of potential leaders. Unity and solidarity amongst prisoners puts prison officials on edge, and an increase in politically-conscious prisoner movements certainly place the whole damn system "on notice".

State and prison authorities know that just beneath the surface of the criminalization, gangsterism, chaos, and violence, lies a collective consciousness and a history of revolutionary struggle against this prison system that has yet to be forgotten. A potential Malcolm X, George Jackson, and the likes: a spirit that is still very much alive today.

Recent work strikes of Georgia State Prisoners and the hunger strikes of California's Pelican Bay State Prison SHU prisoners, is a significant example reminiscent of organized counter strategy. Every race and affiliation were able to unite and participate in these demonstrations. In most cases, prison activists outside, as well as friends and family of the incarcerated, caught prison officials completely off guard, organizing rallies along with solidarity-based hunger strikes and in Georgia, prisoners used mobile phones to coordinate their activities from prison to prison and throughout the state. At an Ohio State Prison, death row inmates protesting the cruel and inhumane conditions of their confinement in isolation, were able to communicate and organize nationwide support. They took to social media websites like Facebook and Twitter along with emails, letters, and articles posted on prisoner support organization bulletin boards.

40 years ago, organized resistance of California prisoners against a racist prison system, and the historic rebellion at Attica Prison in New York, inspired the growth of the early prisoners' rights movement. As part of a nationwide offensive by Federal & State law enforcement and prison officials, measures were taken to stifle prison activism, targeting prisoners' social and political involvements, ideological beliefs and applications to the black liberation movement. Much of our generation, those of us born in the 60's and 70's, are the immediate result of the same repressive measures that targeted the prisoners' rights movement and black liberation movement, respectively. Those of us who're familiar with the history of COINTELPRO, and the discriminatory profiling, "gang" validation, injunctions, and enhancement of law, can see how similar methods are being used to criminalize a new generation - young and old.

We need not look back to the 60's and 70's to find a cause or the motivation to become "political" or more conscious about who we are and where we're at. It's going down right now! Awake or sleep on it, we're in this. Those of us who're still preoccupied with the "back in the day" way of things and those out-moded ways of thinking. Watching the game change but not seeing it. We can romanticize the idea of revolution, the words of revolutionaries, their sacrifices and that warrior ethos, but if we lack the heart and mind to do today what they did yesterday, to at least educate others and set an example, then that knowledge is of no use.

In war and in struggle (as in life) it's necessary to change tactics in order to achieve our objectives; in order to not repeat the mistakes of the past, and so that history may be a guide for a new future. I believe that now is a time for the kind of quality self-leadership, vision, and sacrifice that inspires those around us, to really begin thinking in a new way.

This first issue of WOD is dedicated to the living memory of Troy Davis (whose life was taken as I wrote this piece), and the late Ajamu.

I extend my respect and gratitude to those who're a part of this collective effort, especially those "young elders" (5-20 years my senior) here on the row for your confidence and contributions to this project. You've encouraged others through your positive examples --- including me. Carry On Tradition.

Piankhi

References:

* The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness, by: Michelle Alexander

* Blue Rage, Black Redemption, by Stanley "Tookie" Williams

* Writing Under Fire: Resisting The Regime, by Anthony Ross (Ajani) (article - SFBAYVIEW)

* Another Definition of a Soldier, by S.K.S. Tabanei (article - Anti-Racist Action/LA)

[drawing of Ancient Egyptians in front of the scales of justice]

The title of the design, Awake and Rise Up, is from a passage in Ancient Egyptian text "The book of coming forth by day" called "The Awakening" in it, it describes the dead's conscious departure from this life to the afterlife.

The idea of this design is that, for many of us, death is a state of mind as well. A condition - miseducation, self destructive ignorance and behaviour and hopelessness. The setting is the prison system and environment (CDC - California Department of Corrections) in a country that leads the world in prison population, with disproportionate number of young black men locked down (1 in 9 between the age of 20-34). It represents the mental awakening and liberation achieved through true knowledge of self, history and reality, breaking the chains of our conditioning, and giving us the potential and power to transcend into a state of consciousness - "Life".

KemetInk

"The Road to Solidarity"

The Death Row Inmate Project is an evolving workstation which continues to blossom out of the calls for solidarity.

Many people have said that capital punishment is ultimately caused by a storm of vengeful racism and the killing of poor people, U.S.-led capitalism on a whole different level, a legacy of slavery and servitude which affects the disproportionately impoverished.

Reading this, I'm guessing that the assertions may seem at the outset, outrageous.

Listen when I tell you, they are not. I am condemned to death by lethal injection for a crime unfamiliar to me on so many levels. The platform at DRI, is a way for marginalized voices like mine to be heard. Spencer and I have found a way to lend an ear to the men and women of death rows around the world, to share the images of destruction with our readers, images that have cut into the meat of our hearts --- inspiring stories of resistance and hope combined with visions of survival.

We've met incredible people who have told us about their families and their lives, stories of tragedy and what their loved-ones mean to them --- people who through their personal stories, have helped us understand the depth and breadth of this and other atrocities.

So too, we've been blessed to collaborate with some quality like-minded agencies and their incredible committed activists, folks with energy and skills who aside from their "normal 9 to 5" share immense creativity and even bigger hearts. People who stand in solidarity.

We want to say that we're not writing this as if we've got it all figured out, because we don't. We definitely have our work cut out for us as we continue to find our way through the maze of power, wealth, and privilege which keeps this machinery of vengeance up and running. Speaking from our very own perspectives enjoined by over 40% of the globe's population in vehement opposition to the death penalty, our analysis and first hand experiences have helped us develop this framework. We need to put this on the table, because we believe it's important for our readers to identify with our struggle and those of our friends and neighbors behind these myriad walls.

No matter how well-intentioned, privilege seems to "hijack" solidarity and imperils one's capacity to explore options, even as we mobilize to support the communities and families who wrestle with being afflicted on some level with capital punishment --- blatant criminalization and legalized terror at tremendous costs to taxpayers.

There's a meaningful distinction (at least for us) in maintaining the heartbeat of DRI's evolution and how it is that we've found a niche to educate and inform the public by sharing critical resources with those looking to reconnect (or stay connected) with humanity. Sad to say, there's a justifiable component in confronting the greed and tyranny of prison interest lobbies, politicians, and those who continue to build magnificent careers upon the brittle bones of the condemned across the globe.

Often unconscious and insidious, the media portrayals of guys like us leave much to be desired. But for the media, society wouldn't know to make these kinds of good guy/bad guy distinctions. Standing beside either or both of us at your local bus stop in the late night fog wouldn't cost you your life. Spencer and I are not on death row as child predators or serial killers. Society has found comfort in accepting that which is shared through various forms of media, disabling one's ability to discern for themselves, who they trust and with whom they'll interact. The public is responsible for the level(s) of mistrust that is hatefully spewed from your TV's and internet. This tech-culture is incredibly dangerous, especially when one sits on the fence as it relates to nourishing their minds with quality information. We dare to sound contradictory. The real truth lies in the one answer that only you can decide for yourself --- is the penalty of death for crime, a study in contradiction and unbefitting the societies we live in?

Our deep desire to take action against what is clearly injustice, stems from a goal to reshape community through education, not looking for a hand up or hand out, merely hoping to assemble accountable folks who can join hands with DRI in "solidarity", people willing to help us deal with the issues deserving of resources and relief. One must make themselves "accountable" to humanity, devoid of unconscious arrogance. We have got to see beyond ourselves. Self-determination and leadership are the keys to the power of change, becoming role models in the actions we MUST take.

Solidarity is about feeling good, assuaging guilt and doing something about the status quo which in this case, is about life and living, oppression and liberation, acknowledgment of common ground with others, and lastly, about activism and doing what is right. Solidarity requires us to take critical looks at bigger pictures and obligates us to consider our roles in relation to that acknowledgment. Solidarity forces us to identify with how privilege and power play their roles in our lives and requires us to wrestle with our prejudices, inclinations, and interactions with society --- overhauling assumptions and profoundly changing how we look at becoming accountable.

Spencer and I still have a number of questions about what being "in" solidarity might really mean. It compels each of us to reckon with our own challenges in this horrible journey which affects every single person we know and love and in stark contrast, those who still love us.

The best way for us to remain accountable, is to continue pushing for reform and abolition through the many voices in this online workshop, a place where secrets remain self-serving and justice is an obvious thing of the past.

Categorically, the death penalty forces us to ask ourselves what we're doing today to help keep the flames of adversity lit in our hearts so that alongside communities affected by these plights, we can lead "our" movement for radical social change.

We implore you to pledge a token of YOUR solidarity to DRI today, be it in time, postage, or through the purchase of an item from our online store. We need all of the support we can muster in these shared fights ahead.

Should you wish to read up on some of the other projects we are currently engaged in, send a SASE to: The DRI Project/PMB #154, 3298 North Glassford Hill Road #104, Prescott Valley, Arizona 86314, email: thedriproject@gmail.com
Correspondents:
Michael Flinner #V-30064, SQSP San Quentin, Ca. 94964
Spencer Brasure #P-10000, SQSP San Quentin, Ca. 94964

[No Death Penalty symbol]

"Guilty"

As I sit on my bunk, staring at the drab walls in this 4x9 foot cell here on San Quentin State Prison's Death Row, I ponder the course that brought me face-to-face with an imminent demise. I've come to the startling realization that every tribulation I was forced to confront as a little boy, had led me to make the crucial decision to express my inner-pain through violence --- becoming a serial killer.

Ensnared in a vicious cycle of drug addiction and violence; after the euphoria of the high and the hunt wore off, I was left to face off with my inner-most demons --- insecurities, shame, feelings of inferiority, guilt, and self-condemnation --- causing severe depression and in search for a way to escape this wretched state of mind. My life was spiraling out of control sans the tools nor foreknowledge to stop it.

It didn't come as a surprise when I found myself sitting in a cell and charged with multiple murders, confronting Capital Punishment. Being locked in a cell without the ability to escape myself, led to my deliberate engaging in and of gang activity, participating in gang-related riots against both inmates as well as correctional officers.

After numerous gang acts, I was deemed by prison officials as a "threat to the safety and security of the institution" and subsequently "validated" as a prison gang member and thereafter given an indeterminate SHU term (a term of incarceration in a Security Housing Unit --- a super-max facility often referred to as a "prison within a prison" by guards and convicts alike), others call it "The Hole". With far less out-of-cell time than the general population, I found myself alone with my own worst enemy --- my mind. The painful daily anguish led me to carve out another path: one on a way to alleviating my internal state of mind.

Never the oasis of mortality, I turned to modern psychology but found it to be externally oriented, offering only solutions to mental agony through medication.

Vowing never to take any mind-altering substance again, I had no choice but to look elsewhere, and soon discovered the tome that ultimately changed my life --- the foundation to Eastern psychology, in "The Perennial Psychology of the Bhagavad Gita" by Swami Rama.

The primary technique applied to resolve this dismal mental condition was the discipline of mind. I soon ascertained the cause of inner-turmoil resulting in the identification with negative thoughts, suggestions, and emotions. No longer associating myself with such, I instantly felt a knot unravel within my forehead, realizing peace of mind.

I now identify with the root cause and creation of a serial killer yet through the deliberate, negligent media's portrayal of murderers being cold-blooded, ruthless individuals. I can tell you with firsthand certainty, just how totally inaccurate that is. I AM ONE! I killed because within myself, I was weak and by cultivating inner-strength, I'm working daily to resolve the malady that pushed me to kill.

Armed with this tremendous realization, I'm authoring a book entitled, "Guilty: The Evolution of a Confessed Serial Killer", narrating my life experiences that brought about dysphoria, the ramifications thereof, the modus operandi implemented to unfold myself, and the evolutionary state thus attained, finding peace, strength, optimism, and happiness.

Liberation from such a dismal state of being is not afforded in any of the educational programs I am familiar with in today's society.

Offering this forthcoming book to humanity as a means of prevention to the wanton death and destruction of innocents, by giving the would-be perpetrator a roadmap to overcome one's calamitous qualities residing within, can only be a welcomed alternative to that which fails to exist.

With the continued practice of the mental discipline, I soon elevated to the next stage --- witnessing: no longer identifying with the negative (or positive for that matter) within, and therefore becoming non-attached to the many dramas of the external world. This is the state which allows me to pierce through the illusions created with the dual opposites --- good and evil, right and wrong, etc.

I now fully recognize that the death penalty and all forms of punishment are barbaric. It's easy to blame others and lock them up, giving the illusion that the powers that be, are good (since they combat evil) and by isolating the problem within the individual, thus putting them in a place far removed from society, adding to the misconception that the people are safe and their problems are solved, however, it never cuts to the core of the issue which if we're to concentrate on the "reasonings" of criminality and then repair them, we can live in a safer society. I didn't say "better", I said safer.

Understanding myself, I know how I evolved into a career criminal. It is a mental condition. We must mend the mentality that nourished these states, preventing crime rather than having to discipline it, helping blossom into essential stages of civilization.

Speaking in Truth

Kekoa Manibusan SQSP #T-06046 San Quentin, CA 94964-0001 USA

RESOURCES FOR PRISONERS

South Chicago ABC Zine Distro
P.O. Box 721
Homewood, Illinois 60430

PEN Prison Writing Program
588 Broadway, Ste., #301
New York, NY 10012
pen@pen.org

Prison Activist Resource Center
P.O. Box 70447
Oakland, California 94612
(510) 893-4648

Critical Resistance
1904 Franklin Street #504
Oakland, California 94612
(510) 444-0484
www.criticalresistance.org

Cell Door Magazine
12200 Road 41.9
Mancos, Colorado 81328
publisher@celldoor.com

AK Press
674 - A 23rd Street
Oakland, California 94612
akpress@akpress.org

U.I.M. - F.I.R.S.T.
Postfach 1105
67564 Osthofen
Germany

The DRI Project
3298 North Glassford Hill Road
Suite #104/PMB #154
Prescott Valley, Arizona 86314
www.deathrowinmate.org
thedriproject@gmail.com

Justice Now
1332 Webster Street #210
Oakland, California 94612
(510) 839-7654
www.justicenow.org

Nolo Press
950 Parker Street
Berkeley, California 94710

THROUGH YOUR EYES
by
Bandit

I want to thank you for all you've done for me, through your eyes.

I now can clearly see...

You've shown me love that can never be measured, and this short time we've shared I've treasured...

Your Grandparents sent from the heavens above, who have taught me the authentic definition of love...

And although I may not have been raised by you, it's purely a joy to be loved by you...

So as I start this journey anew from the start, you given me strength and a brand new heart... Because through your eyes I can now clearly see, there's still worth and goodness inside of me...

Thank you both!

Through my eyes
Love grow

By: D.H.
2011

Request Denied
By The DRI Project

We are fated to spend our days in an earthly purgatory, exiled from society by our own actions in many cases. It can be fairly said that the population behind the myriad walls and fences of the nation's correctional facilities represents a significant destructive force, that through our deeds, lives have been destroyed and property lost.

At the same time in the greater world, there is an existential crisis for more than a hundred thousand Americans. They cling to life and hope in the face of unspeakable pain and horror, waiting for the gift of a life-saving organ transplant.

The government has an absolute duty to protect its citizenry. That is the rationale for the imprisonment of so many; that, and the concept of repayment of societal debt, rehabilitation, restitution, punishment for transgression, etc. The word penitentiary says it all - a place to learn penitence.

Why is it then, if the government protects its citizenry, and the objective of imprisonment is to shape positive outcomes in the prisoner, that with a population exceeding two million incarcerated, that those in the "free world" awaiting organ donors and tissue transplants, are deprived of willing donors?

That's right! There is for whatever reason -- be it apathy or oversight, or the outright and backward thinking of the eugenic bigot... a complete lack of any program or protocol for the willing incarcerated to donate living vital organs and tissues to those under sentence of death without them. In rare cases it may be possible to do this for a family member, but the bureaucratic impediments are so substantial that people literally die while awaiting the results of the request for the necessary approval.

It is ironic that an entire segment of the population of the country is excluded from the rolls of the willing. The government protecting our society?

Why is it that the state can take life, labor, income and time from the imprisoned, ask of us to "rehabilitate" ourselves, yet deny us the chance to make the ultimate restitution -- literally the gift of life, the only act that can transcend all others? Meanwhile, the sick languish in such numbers that demand far outstrips supply for match-worthy donors and the benevolent state in its infinite wisdom allows this to go unchecked.

What one could rationalize as ignorance or unintentional indifference soon becomes much murkier.

On San Quentin's Death Row, they will move hell and earth to keep alive the sick, elderly, and terminal cases so that they will face an executioner. They will literally stave off death by heart attack or diabetes over the "Do Not Resuscitate" instruction of an inmate, in the name of "justice".

However, when it comes to heroic measures on behalf of its "law abiding" citizenry, there is no such action to keep them alive. Ask yourself, "What is askew with that set of priorities?"

If you believe that I overstate the case, ask yourself this: Why is it that anyone who gets their driver's license, is asked if they wish to donate their organs in the event of death; yet once one leaves the "free world", nowhere in any file or on any form are you able to do this? You may have been an organ donor when you were free, but as soon as you pass into purgatory, your identification is taken and you are issued a prison number with no such provision. How many organs are wasted every year? The numbers are truly astounding.

It is shameful and sick that such an oversight had to come to light in such a place as hopeless as death row before anyone was moved to do anything about it. For all of the "evil" that exists behind prison walls, a greater evil would be letting a single individual perish when there are untold riches in the form of the willing masses who have a number beyond their name. Allow those who wish for the opportunity to make a difference, to better the world, to better the life of someone in need, and to better themselves. To make restitution by giving life. What is justice if it isn't the act of making some good come of something bad? The same logic is true of the opposite, too. To create something bad from good intentions would be an injustice.

It is an issue that doesn't know bipartisanship. Death is the great bipartisan. Get involved. Ask your representatives why a single person would be denied the opportunity to live if there is a chance to save them while more than ample resources exist -- living and deceased.

Certain of these efforts are blossoming online at www.deathrowinmate.org. I hope that you'll become a member in favor of this long overdue agenda.

visit: www.deathrowinmate.org email: thedriproject@gmail.com

A NEW GENERATION
by
Xzyzst

When I first was sent to Death Row, it was like the earth stopped spinning.

I stuck out like a sore thumb - from the way I wore my clothes, to the idea of what I considered to be a quality workout in physical exercise. It was like stepping back into the late 1970's and some dudes were even wearing the bottoms of their pant leg tucked into their socks. LOL - some still do.

In 2011, my observations included that most of us in "our" generation are coming to Death Row after graduating from high school or attending college, whereas most of the older brothaz graduated from high school or are in receipt of their GED from a prison classroom, many haven't finished school at all. I'm sadly reminded of my late father whom ironically enough, was in this same prison in the late 1970's and died last year not knowing how to read.

Most in "our" generation have had long term relationships and were married (or still are) before coming to Death Row, compared to the older brothaz who end up getting married while in prison and/or have never experienced a long term relationship outside of these prison visiting rooms.

"Our" generation are predominantly computer literate and are part of the "hip-hop" culture - a culture known for its DJ'ing, recording music, and performing before live concert audiences. We have grown to move with the culture.

Because time in prison stymies behavioral maturity, it is obvious that the older brothaz are far removed from the serious culture gap with few meaningful encounters with Death Row youth - simply engrossed in societal stigma. It is time to rebuild the bridge.

It hit me one day when prison officials began allowing Death Row inmates to purchase both CD's as well as their respective players. One brotha asked me if he could remove the CD from the player, flip it over, and play the other side. I admit it was funny and yes I laughed but I couldn't help but think, "would this be me in the future?" How many little things have I taken for granted while out in society because I moved in the same direction as the growing culture?

It's becoming noticeable how we gravitate toward one another and we are very meticulous about which older "cats" we associate with. We have zero tolerance for old convict mentalities and misuse of antiquated knowledge generally used to manipulate and navigate through traditional destructive dark values. This is prison, we get it, enough already!

To a greater degree, we are multicultural. It remains a difficult task to complete this topic without offending ideologies, subcultures and values, but as you can tell by my writing, "our" generation here on Death Row are readily intelligent, articulate, and driven with creativity.

The Papyrus Collective sprang from the mind of one of Death Row's wise youngstaz who networked with an older man of another race, and they both chose and reached out to consolidate resources, leading by example with qualified minds to provide this very forum of expression from the inside out. This brand new era - led by the youth and endorsed by the worthy.

We reject the negative portrayals of youth in the eyes of the media around the nation - The Youth of Death Row unit across this nation put the world on notice, provide a concise representation that today's youth are indeed tomorrow's elders and that "without the seed, they can be no crop, no crop, no food, no food, and we all starve."

All but three of the youth on Death Row that I know of, have children living in society with you and over half of the 720+/- men condemned to death here, came while still under the age of 33. How old or young are you? Who's next?

NEW GENERATION: PART II
by
Xzyzst

Welcome to the future, the New Generation of action oriented captives in prison, eager to display, share, learn and teach the necessary adjustments needed to be addressed in order to cause growth and an open path to all forms of freedom to the incarcerated all over the world.

In this article, I want to focus on the world's attention being drawn to observe what youth are "at risk of", we at Papco challenge community leaders all of you, to join us in our campaign to change that focus to what youth are "at risk from".

At risk of is a reactive approach to a situation.
At risk from is preventive in nature to a situation.

At risk of indulging in drug activity, street violence, and self-destructive behavior is a police minded approach to the larger community issue that has already become "out of control".

By redirecting the focus to exactly what the youth are at risk from, we provide for a window of opportunity to gain control before the policy makers force feed our communities the need to rush to the polls and vote in favor of more detention, more corrections, and punishment with language like "War on Crime".

Billions of dollars are allocated for Corrections Departments that affect our youth only after a transition into lifestyles unacceptable to society, and after our youth has become a ward of the State. Mind you, there is still no system set up to protect the hundreds of thousands of falsely accused incarcerated youth in this country, and those youth are so traumatized by that form of child abuse, that to excel in education; and trade skill training, mental and spiritual development in spite of the harsh conditions of confinement is an issue in great need of even more attention, and for those remarkable youth, there should be programs that provide certification for those youth to spearhead efforts to educate their peers conducive to the dynamics of what it really means to be "at risk". Those kids are our next effective leaders if we prepare them now.

The New Generation propose an urgent reallocation of funds already provided to agencies, to be re-directed into new employment creation that targets solutions, and are preventive and action oriented, specifically career training in community development projects. Yes, we are saying train the youth to build the community, and maintain the integrity of the program by training youth to train other youth in areas of proper parenting. We use the word proper as it highlights what is often deficient in inner-cities, and more times than not, can become the igniter to the evolving progress towards the difficult transition into adulthood. Proper parenting is just one of the many issues to be addressed by the youth.

Anyone feel compelled to assist in the drafting of the curriculum of this solution based New Generation community building project designed for youth to lead?

100 Black Men, where are your youth? Urban League, where are your youth? NAACP, where are your youth? I can call hands all day, we want to convey to the world that most youth are experiencing some form of incarceration before they become a ward of the state. Some homes, and over all communities which includes the social fabric, have become prison-like settings for most facilities. For instance, schools are being closed, and the remaining ones are becoming prison-like environments while more prisons are being built and are becoming the new centers for education. I'll repeat this later.

We are no longer interested in the old conspiracy theory that this was all a plan by the system to keep us down. The New Generation don't do conspiracy, we know that every house built derived from minds of architects. Our focus is on the demolition of those structures and creating a new foundation of self-worth and leadership for the next group of talented architects from our communities. Our youth are incredible without instruction, I challenge you to involve in the youth development movement and be amazed at what they can do under the influence of you.

We know for a fact that words shape societies. For example, I love to repeat what the late Stanley "Tookie" Williams told me one day on the yard before his senseless murder, he was explaining how people have been conditioned to say things like:

"If I can just help one person, it would make my efforts worth it."

Tookie said, "If you have only helped one person, you have failed the rest."

The New Generation, like Tookie believe that we must shift away from those traditional ideologies that obviously don't work, and build on the efforts of our predecessors by instilling greater value systems in the minds of the next generation.

At Papco, we refuse to be products of our environment and we encourage the world to end subjecting our youth to this kind of psychological abuse that hinders growth.

Solution, the new saying, and statement that you should be telling our youth is: "your environment should be a product of you."

Whenever we hear or read someone describe a "bad neighborhood", they basically straight up called the people "bad".

Nobody ever called the neighborhood where Phillip and Nancy Guriddo lived a "bad neighborhood" because evidently kidnapping a child off the streets and abusing her for 18 years is not a street crime, drug activity, or gang violence. In fact it's obvious how the parole system does not practice equal justice. Justice has its own issues, but equal justice has never risen to any level of what is truly defined as equal in this country, taking off hoods and sheets, and putting on uniforms has not changed the situation in the inner-city.

For 18 years while Jacee Duggard was being traumatized by a parolee. The same parole agency was too busy being "tough on crime" to the point where the courts installed injunctions against people who was labeled gang members to stay out of even the communities where they have children. Think about that, people was arrested, had their parole conditions violated and thrown back in prison because the parent in them was unable to stay away from their child, while Phillip Guriddo had someone else's child, and targeting other children, documented on video tape in areas he was free to roam without an injunction to keep him away from everyone else's children. They worry more about saggy pants than keeping known child molesters away from our children.

I don't believe in reform, so probation and parole agencies in my opinion are a larger part of the overall destructive failure and disorder in our communities, this cycle is deadly when viewed with a powerful, wider lens.

*****

Close schools, build prisons, the remaining schools become prisons, and prisons become centers for education. The Juvenile Justice System is designed to capitalize and exacerbate the totality of the situation to the point of assuring our youth maintain a 0.0 grade point average in the school of life, only to graduate to adult facilities with dishonors. Prison jobs are ready and available to everyone who couldn't find a job in society. Free education is offered to prisoners that had no idea that a Technical Trade School existed in the area they lived in before incarceration. Prison and parole boards are more interested in producing model prisoners than keeping model youth out of prison. The state has a budget that included funding for the Department of Corrections and its agencies to produce model prisoners, no temp application fee required, no prison experience needed, no portfolios or references required, ironic, sad.

Need a job? Come to prison, they don't even need to advertise. When the opportunity for youth is offered to the youth in its correctional facilities, it becomes displayed proof that the captor of its captives, possess the freedom to offer assistance and positive development programs before incarceration. This epitomizes deprivation.

When we aim to help every child we literally render the judicial system obsolete, so it's no surprise that the Department of Corrections will never address the real issues in our inner cities because the system itself is operating on a life support system that constitutes a high demand for failure in the lives of our young people. When our children fall into the system the village has assisted the captors, and the downfall of our youth provides billions of dollars every year to the agencies that are designed to maintain the cycle.

If it takes a village to raise a child, the village in this country has failed hundreds of thousands of youth who are now prisoners in this country.

Now I know that my writing style is very critical of "The System", it is what it is and I welcome anyone to challenge my disposition. Moreover, I'm as equally radical against the lack of love we as a people display to our youth, in my next article I plan to address my community to raise awareness as to how we as a people misdiagnose our own youth and how we as a people inflame destruction by creating energies through words that create environments for failure. Join me at New Generation Part III.

State Raised

The life of Tecumseh Nehemiah Colbert represents the journey of horror, dehumanization and psychological torture that hundreds and thousands of children in the U.S. pass through each year in youth "correctional" institutions across the nation. His story is the shocking truth of a poor child transformed into a tool of fear for political and economic convenience by the state of California's infamous "YOUTH AUTHORITY". Over the past twenty years the incarceration rate of the nation has increased by 800%, an unprecedented amount of punitive legislation and court rulings that have succeeded in gutting the constitution and given rise to one of the largest industries in the U.S. - prisons. In this book you will feel the reality of life behind bars from a child to a young man. The facts in this story will open your eyes to the truth of what children have had to go through in California's Youth Authorities for years. In an environment where it's predator prey you will learn of the wars, politics, rapes, and games played behind those questionable walls. In a place where only the strong survive, Tecumseh had to fight battles day after day to demand the respect that he so badly strived for. Was it his fault that he had to fight for respect in those institutions better known as "Gladiator school"? You will be able to answer that question for yourself once you get a dose of this reality. The reality of life behind bars, the reality of being STATE RAISED.

6785 Imperial Ave, San Diego, CA 92114
www.stateraised.org

NEW GENERATIONS, PT. 3
by
Xzyzst

Dear Community,

Well, I'm on death row now and I miss you. I know you may be shocked to be receiving a letter from me since I was always the kid that came from a "broken home". I don't know why you described me in that way but I just kept it inside, I didn't know how to tell you to stop saying that and how much it really affected me.

I began to listen to you and even though I was just a kid, somehow I knew inside that the two words broken and home should never be spoken together, one of my teachers would call that a compound word. I guess I learned a few things before I got kicked out of school.

You called me disruptive, someone diagnosed me with having a disorder called ADHD. They gave me medication, but they still called me more names like hyperactive and trouble maker. I always wondered why everyone was saying these things about me and to me, never caring to ask me why I didn't get along with other kids.

I was peerless, the other kids were too slow for me.

I was never asked why I fell asleep in class or became a disruption.

I was bored, I had already done the assignments in my head before the unprepared, unqualified teacher abused me with those boring non-stimulating methods. I loved school, it was being put in the wrong class with students that needed to be taught at a snail's pace. I learned fast. I play fast. I'm young and full of life and excited to learn. But you starved me of life, so I had to wait for the other kids to catch up and you was wasting my time, because I could've been at home developing software, or graphic designs full of art projects in my head. You asked me to write with a pencil when I can write much faster on an electronic gadget device and produce more work than you asked me for.

I never told you this but me and my friends had to deal with two N-words, not just one. But nobody in our community ever did a march or protest for those of us in our own communities that were being ostracized for being a Nerd.

In our Community we had to dumb ourselves down just to fit in, so I acted a fool in class. I did things and dressed in clothes that saved my life on many occasions. Being smart in our community is not cool and is the equivalent of being black, obese, poor, having an alternative sexual orientation, and every other thing we as a community tease, bully, and exploit against each other before I ever got into trouble with the juvenile authorities. Not cool to be smart.

At least the gang set up a family environment that included pride and representation of our community. I never felt like a real member of the community until I made friends that had similar experiences. A broken home is not easy for a teenager to fix, so my first taste of failure came when I took on the task of trying to keep my parents together.

Divorce is not a good word for kids, but kids are expected to just shake it off, get to school, and become amazing. Most of my homies had only one parent for reasons only the parents knew and that made a lot of us angry, because kids are always left out of the real issues that should hold us together as a family.

What did you expect from me? Genius? Interesting. Genius is defined as having tutelary spirit, natural inclinations, a person who influences another for good or evil; a peculiar or distinctive character; strongly marked capacity or aptitude, extraordinary intellectual power. Sounds like most inner city youth to me, and now Juvenile Halls and prisons are overcrowded with our New Generation.

Trouble maker? Problem child? Bad influence? Hyperactive? Look again. How many geniuses did you destroy by misdiagnosing we with psychological disorders and gave us medication to slow our brains down. Really, how valuable is control?

Even after you put us me on drugs, put me in jails and called me all of those trouble names. I still invented Hip Hop, I still learned about all of the world's religions. I still dissected history. I still play chess. I still play piano, I sing, rap, and dance. I still became an intellectual force in order to help other young people develop positive dispositions in life, I still teach pugilism and I'm still a student. I'm still a husband, I'm still a father. I still exist, even on death row I exist. Yes, your youth are now coming to death row.

Now imagine what I would be today if you would've welcomed me into your community. Coming from a broken home was not my problem. My problem was out of everybody in our large community I was the only person that hoped and worked for that one day when we would all be one happy family.

It's too bad you misdiagnosed me early, but I'm glad you did because now I get to do for youth what you failed to do for my generation. Yes, I've got my hands full, but my love for my community will never delude. I forgive you and I love you, but there is a difference this time around. You see, when I was a kid I didn't know what it took to ask you for help to save me from a life of crime and punishment, but now I'm an adult and I've learned how to ask for help to help others. Village, fail no more children. Generation X is defined as Americans born in the 1960's and 70's, you may never develop rehabilitation programs to treat the New Generation; however, the New Generation is up for the challenge to be a community and appeal to all of you to help build the next generation, or maintain the cycle of defeat and destruction. This is what you can do with now:

#1. Stop teaching kids that rich people make us poor. That is a terrible message to deliver to a young mind being reared in a capitalist society.

#2. Stop confusing greed with wealth. Learn the difference, know the difference, design curriculum and teach the difference.

#3. Encourage your youth to watch a program called "Biz Kidz" and have open group discussions with your young children about financial matters. Use candy, use toys, use veggies, use socks, use your creative minds to indulge them into making money, saving money, and spending, and things like compound interest. This should start ASAP at every age.

This solution based idea creates opportunity for your child to become known around the community as a responsible model youth as your child accompanies you to the market, the bank, and every other community associated entity.

Trust me, creditors, and banks will love to see your child applying for employment and when it's time for financial independence.

#4. Create part time pay positions for youth in your community that are peer leaders in the efforts of positive youth development.

Right now the streets and prisons are offering more job opportunities than the community.

#5. Organize your peer group leaders to gather the youth in the community and attend the City Council sessions when the merchants and business owners attend, and when the floor becomes open the youth must address the panel and business owners and put them on the spot. Let them know "we came to get hired, we previously received offers to work on the streets in multiple capacities, but we declined those positions because we value our community and seek employment from those owners in the meeting." Do your homework, know the store, or shops' addresses, know the owner's name, call them out and point out each young person that you brought, present yourselves in a manner that you are responsible, eager, and prepare to work, now.

If nobody gets hired, you walk away knowing that you just planted a very valuable seed in your community, and moreover, they may be prepared to deal with you at the next meeting when you address the floor over and over again until the business owners and politicians figure out that they need new voters and a safer community. So your first shot is a win no matter how it turns out.

#6. Download mock applications from everywhere and teach the youth how to be prepared by having a Q&A session about what is appropriate to put on a job application. I'm talking about employment preparation, free of charge, under sage conditions, and an environment proper to embrace the exchange, and discussion between youth that conveys reasons and questions about choosing to work for less than street money. I would love to see a DVD recording of those exchanges because it's not answers that I look for, I look for the willingness and creative ways youth come up with developing resolve, problem solvers.

Who is responsible for teaching our youth insight and good sense? Who prepares our youth to embrace the word "no" as an opportunity to receive the word "yes" at another date? We don't have a lot of time, so in the mean time our youth can operate an online network shop with its profits going towards all parties involved. Kids can form an investment shop where 5 dollars from one person becomes 5 million dollars when they encourage their peers to invest with them together as a group by earning compound interest.

Kids have so many online friends so their social skills are already intact. I'm talking about creating an inner city youth led investment online enterprise that opens and maintains an online account with Capital One, or Chase, or a bank that offers a package that is designed for group investors.

12 year olds can do this now. How many teenagers do you know that have 5 bucks? A computer? And a need for money? And have a bazillion friends.

The internet has kept a lot of kids out of jail, now teach our youth to use this medium to create capital, and this can be done right now in any neighborhood. The youth can work out the details, I'm just offering an opportunity to those youth that need to trail blaze.

Close friends can come up with a name for the site and who knows what this idea can turn into? This is how the New Generation thinks behind these prison walls, so this letter is not only just to let you know that in spite of, I'm doing fine, I'm letting you know that you are surrounded by the New Generation, and they are looking for what I looked for when I was with you, love, creativity, freedom to change my own mind, new ideas to be heard, cared for and most of all a member of you. You are my community to be a product of me by spending more quality time with our next generation.

Look for me again. Your next leader is the one with the interesting haircut, she has an attitude problem, he always has an angry look on his face, she's chewing gum in class, his cellphone keeps disturbing class, she had another fight, he just cracked a joke, he thinks all of the girls want him, she thinks nobody wants to be her friend.

He just said "you don't know me", she's been too quiet, they are passing notes, he smokes weed and can't stop laughing. She's obese and moody, he's skinny and trying to sag his pants, he's rapping in the cafeteria, there he goes trying to ditch class again. She is very tired and looks exhausted, he's in detention again, all of their handwriting sucks, they called you a bitch, his eyes are glassy, she has birth control pills in her backpack, wow, I hope that's not a gun.

These kids are geniuses waiting to be guided towards greatness, now would be a terrible time to be boring.

Now would be a terrible time to call the police, now would be a terrible time to misdiagnose the symptoms of a true genius.

Now is the perfect time to take them out of that class setting that was not designed for them, you need to challenge the next generation with a setting that is conducive to learning. The word needs to get out, everyone needs to be talking about trying to get closer to where you are. The safest place in the community should be with you.

Have questions, go to papyruscollective@gmail.com and I'll respond as soon as I receive your message, or questions or comments. I'm open to any questions as I'm surrounded by my fellow New Generation team at Papco and it is our honor to become an inside think tank to assist you and all of our youth in creating an open path to progress, and to all forms of freedom to the incarcerated all over the world. If you just read all three New Generation pieces, I wrote this for you.

Love always, Xzyzst

deathrowinmate.org
A Grassroots Anti-Death Penalty Social Network

MEMORANDUM

DATE: SEPTEMBER 15, 2011

FROM: W.O.D. (WRITE OR DIE) @DRI

TO: CAPTIVES OF THE PRISON INDUSTRY COMPLEX

RE: THE DRI PROJECT

There's growing solidarity among captives of our nation's enormous prison system.

DRI is but one little fish in the vast sea of prisoners' rights groups on the ground outside of these walls - providing us with support, information, and various other services.

WWW.DEATHROWINMATE.ORG is a grassroots human rights and anti-death penalty social network designed to give us (death row and lifers in particular) a platform from which to speak.

It's easy to see that there are many "other" websites on the outside who really don't understand or have any personal experience with this inside world. The prison industry has unconsciously opened a door for those who've learned to exploit prisoners - profiting from these emerging environments.

No one can better understand captivity than the captive himself. The heartbeat of DRI's evolution was born in the flames of adversity, the very same adversity we all know so well.

Promoting productive alternatives and positive activities for prisoners and activists alike, DRI offers a very effective penpal service, private inmate art galleries, a publishing platform (papyrus collective), a myriad of socially-conscious and rehabilitative agendas like "Convicts against Cancer" and our Inmate Donor Initiative.

Our Twitter following is gigantic (@deathrowinmates) and our voice is strong. With on-air commercials, a YouTube channel and growing product line, why go anywhere else? Request your inmate service application and information by sending a S.A.S.E. today to:

The DRI Project
3298 North Glassford Hill Road
Suite #104/PMB #154
Prescott Valley, Arizona 86314

Or email us at: thedriproject@gmail.com

Amazon.com Prime

A Portion of Thyself: Essential Reflections From Death Row by Michael Flinner (Paperback - January 30, 2010) $17.99

Michael Flinner's comments on the process of writing this book: "I've found that writing allowed for the confrontation of my rehabilitation and grief head-on."

This insightful compilation of thoughts relate to self worth and various other topics. They stem from self destructive behaviors and imperfect memories.

"I hope you'll pick up a copy and support our continued efforts at abolishing capital punishment." (Michael Flinner)

Visit: deathrowinmate.org

The Sacred Eye of the Falcons: Lessons in Life from Death Row
Price: $16.26
Ships in 3-5 business days

A collection of sayings and aphorisms concerning self-transformation under exceedingly difficult circumstances. The three death-row authors, including the late Stanley Tookie Williams, draw on their combined 70-plus years of experience on death row to formulate first principles for personal growth and social change.

By Anthony Ross, Steve Champion, Stanley Tookie Williams
View this Author's Spotlight
Paperback, 45 pages

Ordering Information: On-line at:

http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/the-sacred-eye-of-the-falcon-lessons-in-life-from-death-row/2197090

Ratings & Reviews
Lulu Sales Rank: 30265

Papyrus Collective

vox populi vox Dei
(the voice of the people is the voice of God)

There exists a documented conversation between men hanging on crosses after being given the death penalty. One of those men is still a major figure in the lives of people all over the world and yet there are now THOUSANDS of people on death row around the world. Go figure.

For far too long the media and other agencies have represented captives on death row from a narrow window, from the outside, and the results are often one-sided, misleading, and straight up false. Papco inspires the world to experience unedited conversations between the souls still hanging on the cross at the place of the skull - Golgotha.

The institutional "Instruction Manual for Legal Murder" has not changed. When the people are forced to focus on the person on the cross, by default the condition itself at the same time forces the people not to focus on the systematic overthrow of the underclass, a scheme to silence the people, hidden in plain sight.

Gone are the days of just executing old child molesters and the serial killer. There now exists a new type of political prisoner being held captive on death row, the "New Generation" of targeted inner city youth accused of committing "street level crimes", who are given death sentences in exchange for the political and capital advancement of corrupt law enforcement agents, attorneys, and judges.

The discussion at Golgotha continues:

DATE: August 7, 11

LOCATION: California Death Row, San Quentin State Prison. Golgotha, The Place of the Skull

QUESTIONS BY: Xzyzst

RESPONSES BY: AI-B

AT GOLGOTHA
by
Xzyzst

XZ: In keeping with the new culture here on Death Row I want to acknowledge you as a true Prince of our people and openly display what an honor it is to be in your presence, New Generation rising, yeah?

AB: New Generation rising for sure. Gone are the days of open contempt displayed amongst our people, real talk.

XZ: As we "technically" hang here on the cross let the people be exposed to this historical moment; where did you grow up?

AB: Well, after my ancestors were dragged to the shores of this country my family somehow migrated to Pittsburg, California.

XZ: How old were you when you were arrested for the case that brought you to death row?

AB: 18 years old.

XZ: Wow! To date this may make you the youngest person on death row in California.

AB: You may be right. I'm 24 now and have been here since 2007 and to my knowledge - yeah, damn, I just might be the youngest, huh?

XZ: Ain't that something! Uhmm, so far has this place been anything like you've imagined or heard it was like when you were in the outer society?

AB: Hell no! One cannot fully explain the death row experience, all I can say is, it's the complete opposite of what one would've thought it to be. For instance, majority of the cases profiled in the media about death row are actually the minority, there are more individuals like myself being sent here.

XZ: When you say individuals like yourself, what do you mean?

AB: Basically, I mean the new generation of politically conscious individuals who've become enlightened after their incarceration, at how they've been bagged and tagged before they knew it from trumped up charges and a long list of enhancements and special circumstance... the Bay Area is one of the most radical spots in the United States, just being interested in the area I am from and studying its history I've learned a lot. But even more than this I say individuals like myself, meaning youngsters who haven't had the chance to experience any real part of life before theirs was taken from them and also referring to the lack of unity up here - it's just sad, man, I can't believe it.

XZ: That's a common theme for the new generation that rolled up here in massive waves from, like, 1995 to now, feel me? So what adjustments are you making to not become connected to the shameful disconnected state of conditions?

AB: Being I came from a community that at the least taught me how I should lead myself, I strive not to be a product of this environment like so many others here. Once again, our new generation is a the minority here and we're refusing to embrace the disappointing direction of the majority, and, real talk, we want this mentality to catch on here so that this environment can begin to become a product of us. Seriously, I ain't never been nowhere like this in all of my life.

XZ: So, did you get a fair trial?

AB: LOL. I knew this question was comin'. Hell no, it's impossible to get a fair trial for a plethora of reasons. But one of the first major reason I noticed was how 9 times out of 10 the jurors were in a hurry to get back to their lives, like it was a payback detail instead of their duty as a citizen.

XZ: Hold up, did you just say you wasn't the only one that didn't want to be there?

AB: But trip how this works, though. The jurors were like why is this taking so long, he was arrested by the police so he must be guilty of something. It's like why even show these people any evidence when they've been conditioned to vote "guilty" before the case even starts, especially when the victim is a cop.

XZ: Somebody needs to write a book on the whole jury selection process, which is a great segue into my next question. Knowing a little bit of your story do you plan to write a book? If so, when can we expect it?

AB: I'll say I've thought about it but I can't give you a date because, seriously, I want to write about unity and a positive story, but so far this hasn't been my experience. Compared with some of the other people who've been here for 20, 30 years I just got here and there's a lot I still need to learn about writing and all of that, but like I said it'll all come.

XZ: I'm now showing you some photos of my two teenage children. As you look at these pictures I want you to imagine yourself speaking to a middle school kid, what would be the one thing you would lace this youngster with to help prevent them from ending up in prison or on death row?

AB: I'd let 'em know this is the closest thing to slavery re-vamped as it gets. Don't ever become a slave to no one because slavery demands a life long commitment; you will live and die a slave to others if you fail to lead yourself.

XZ: Didn't expect that answer, fo'real, fo'real. One of the routine questions we ask comes from the African Proverb "It takes a village to raise a child." With this in mind name one thing you did not get from your village that you wanted as a kid? Mind you, I'm talking about your village outside of your immediate family.

AB: In my case the answer would be football, from the time I was 6 until I got my chance at 15 years old.

XZ: I mean, wasn't football, along with all the other sports, afforded to youth in the inner-cities, how did you get missed?

AB: Well, when I did go out for football, the so-called coach would show up an hour and a half late to every practice and some of the older homies had to take his place until he showed up high on drugs, Man, it was an addict runnin' shit. Oh, and one coach when I was 15 said he had to cut me because he had to pick other kids with more experience, since they'd been playing since they were 8 years old. All he could tell me what I had the weight and good hands and feet but that I was inexperienced at the game, so I got cut because I'd never played. You see, this is what they don't tell people about those community programs, that they're set up to build winning football teams to show success in the community. So some kids don't make the cut because the focus isn't actually on building up the youth in the inner-city but about winning games. After that I was like "whatever", you feel me? Now the only memory I have of my childhood desire to play football, is this nasty chewing tobacco the coach was always spittin' out as he sat back doing nothing, while the more experienced kids ran the drills. It ain't the village, homie, it's the people running the village that failed our youth; winning plus winning equals funding.

XZ: I noticed when we told you this Write or Die project was based on positive youth development your face lit up, what's up with that?

AB: When I was younger I would've liked for someone to have taken the initiative with me and now that I'm here and get to take part in being a part of the solution I stand ready, our generation is on deck now so it's on. When I was coming up there wasn't anything positive comin' out of prison, just the same ol' propaganda designed to herd people back into prison so I never made a prison, positive connection, so you can count me in on stuff like this.

XZ: You're a blessing for that one. It's a trip because all we see in the media is self-hatred and destruction they hardly ever show our generation's true love of our own, as if all just don't want to do nothing but smash each other.

AB: That's why they call it T.V., cable, and satellite "programming", because it's inducing nature conditions people, its viewers, to believe we all can't stand each other and as a result set up subcultures who beef each other off the face of the planet, that's how they see us, man.

XZ: Let's go deeper, yeah? We get questions from our online community at sites like DRI and one visitor asked how do people on death row deal with the loss of a loved one or friend, you're welcome to pass on this if you want to.

AB: It's a trip how that works because I found myself giving others on the outside methods to embrace the vicissitudes of life and it became therapeutic for me in dealing with my own experiences of loss, especially when that person was loved by so many. So for me consoling others and encouraging them to embrace the discomfort and make the necessary adjustments to continue on in life, became the very advice I needed myself; taking one's own advice is not easy, man. But that's how I've dealt with loss.

XZ: As you know last year my father was murdered in the doorway of a market in the hood and as a result I avoided addressing the issue, but now sitting here vibing with you and knowing how my father would want me to face reality head up, it compels me to express the difficulties I had in experiencing every human emotion all at once over his death. However, you are right, because I had to be strong for my family on the outside, helping them to cope, and then going out to the yard to socialize, get some fresh air, and take in the celebrative energy and comments from all of y'all really helped in my recovery. Young Whacc told me that "when you stop thinking of it as a loss of a father in this life and begin to receive it as gaining a known ancestor in the next realm of existence, the inevitable becomes easier to embrace", that was valuable.

AB: My mom just passed over last month and my focus was also on how my family were doing - wait, Whacc said that!?

XZ: Yep. Sharp ass youngsta; he don't say much but when he do it's valuable. So, what do you think about Papco and Write or Die so far?

AB: Yeah, man, I didn't think it was going to be like this, the intent and social dynamic is cool. But back to the question about losing loved ones, that was a loaded one but I think we both handled it better than we thought we would.

XZ: About a week ago I heard you speaking on George Jackson, where were you going with all that?

(both laughing out loud)

AB: Boy, now you going to get us in trouble. LOL; you already know I love reading his work. The thing to me about George Jackson is his position, he wasn't enthralled by the benefits he would reap for laying his life on the line for the much needed change that era needed. He already knew our generation would be born and appreciate his sacrifice and, real talk, I believe that he was writing directly to us. Here is a man writing to us in 2011 from the 1970's as if we were family, at least that's how I see it.

XZ: Personally, I was too mesmerized by the actions of his younger brother Johnathan to focus on all of that, ol' boy was a rider, huh?

(both laughing out loud)

AB: I'm telling you we're already up under the jail, don't get me started, man! To say the least, at bare minimum, what greater love can one brother display for his brother. It's like out of all of them Johnathan saw what the end of those court proceedings were going to be and decided the outcome was his to change. For me Johnathan epitomizes the intellectual capacity of our new generation because we're moving forward in spite of others claiming control, either we win big or die putting the world on notice that some of us ain't with the bullshit. This is where I can relate to George's book titled "Soledad Brothers".

XZ: Permission to encourage you?

AB: Permission granted.

XZ: More of our new generation is on the way here as we speak, they will make observations exactly like we did when we first touched down. Remain the difference, encourage them not to wait for the death squad to come before they start getting serious about fighting their cases, don't look at each other all cockeyed, look to each other with eyes of confidence. Remain the solid example that you already are, divide and conquer must remain a weak and ineffective primitive tactic when used against the new generation, you are the new leadership on death row. And all those continuing to bang on the left must get left as you move forward with all those set on doing this right. Now I end this cipher as it was done at Golgotha: Lord, remember me when you come into your Kingdom...

AB: Today you will be with me in paradise.

Reaching Out
by
Demetrius Howard

Hello

To all of you, it is our sincerest wish here in SQSP (death row) as well many others on death rows across the state fighting for our freedom & life, that you all are doing & feeling well physically, spiritually. And that you are continuing to stand up and fight the injustices that many of us are being forced to endure, being illegally imprisoned. It is our hope that you will not lose faith, nor the will to fight. And that you will not lose faith, nor the will to fight. And that you will not give up the cause of exposing the many unjust convictions that has been obtained as a result of the corruption. Many men & women, such as myself, Troy Davis, Keith Fudge, Darrell Lomax, Kevin Cooper, and Kenneth Claire, Karl Holmes, Byron Wilson, and many many more, are being held behind these walls for decades for crimes the police & the prosecutors know we didn't commit.

For them it is about obtaining convictions, they fail to ensure that justice is sought and the correct individuals are prosecuted & in custody. There's so many, as I have named a handful above. There's Mumia, and countless others who suffer imprisonment for years without any light ever being brought to their wrongful convictions. It is without question a travesty & miscarriage of justice done to us by those who have taken an oath of upholding the law, not breaking the law in order to get a conviction. Since 1992 I have fought for my freedom with passion & determination to free myself from this inhumane & psychological torture, that this place does to the human mind, body, spirit & soul. This place is cruel & can break men & women in every way possible. So it is imperative we hold onto our sanity, our faith, and our will to fight the injustices that so many of us have to endure. The evidence in my case was falsely presented against me supports my innocence, no fingerprints, no DNA, even the state's own eyewitness testified it was not me!

Despite all of this & even the person who also was arrested & admitted to this crime declared that someone else was with him and not me. Here I sit on SQSP death row, falsely imprisoned. Myself as well as many others, are reaching out to all of you for your help in our cause! Many are in this predicament, I don't know all of their names or their situations, but our circumstances are the same, sitting on death rows somewhere clawing & fighting to be heard - and freed, refusing to surrender, we hope that none of you surrender, because we aren't going to win them all just as the fight for Stan Tookie Williams & now Troy Davis, was not won. Their spirit & voice lives on through us. For they are our brother and friend in this struggle. Just as many others' spirit lives on calling for justice, their voices will forever be heard, the bell rings on! We are up against some very zealous & evil, selfish, and corrupt system.

Prosecutors & police officers who know they have absolute immunity from being prosecuted for their wrongdoings, so they continue to be encouraged to lie, cheat & become the worst of the worst simply to win. While bad mouthing the people they are trying to prosecute & convict. Not once ever mentioning all of their underhanded and corrupt acts, fabricating evidence, as well as testimony. Throughout this country there are many of us in need of your help in whichever way you can be of assistance. California may not be murdering anyone at this time, but it's not like they aren't waiting with eagerness to resume this evil process. Troy Davis, an innocent man's life meant nothing to them. He was expendable! Where in California, a young man out enjoying the New Year with friends, Oscar Grant's life meant nothing, murdered without a care by those who so easily are willing to take these men's lives. They mattered!! Life without parole or life is not a replacement for those of us that are innocent. As we extend our hands out to you hoping that you will grab hold, we know you can be instrumental in proving we have been illegally convicted & imprisoned. Uniting as a collective is powerful, power we see is what gets things done. Let's use that power to do some good & right! Do not be defeated or discouraged, we have the strength it takes to overcome any hate & evilness! In solidarity, friendship, thank you for your time & attention. You can read about my case at www.freedemetriushoward.yahoo.com.

***

[page 36 missing]

When on dying ground you have no fear because you are already in hell. With this philosophy you can only go forward. For many prisoners a life or death sentence means: "It's too late to change" or "What's the point? I'm not ever getting out." But survival does not mean merely existing from day to day, going from one hustle to the next. Even the most veteran prisoner will admit that the "Play-it-by-ear" lifestyle gets old. Our life in prison doesn't have to rotate around waking up and hanging out. It should involve the total employment of all of our faculties geared toward enriching our lives. It doesn't matter where we are, be it in prison or free, we should engage life, not retreat from it. Just because we suffer a defeat or come to prison doesn't mean we should give up our aspirations, goals, and the desire to better ourselves.

On the contrary, we should become even more committed to learning, taking the initiative, building resources, and never giving up. A life without purpose and direction is the life of a walking corpse. There is no middle ground when it comes to surviving, so don't settle for easy or comfortable little niches that offer no real substance. The harder you push yourself the more you learn how to put theory into practice; how to learn from your mistakes; and how to take optimal advantage of every opportunity. Everything you do must lead you forward not backward.

"Power is the ability to define your reality and then have others respond to your definition." - Dr Wade Nobles

Imagine standing at the base of a pyramid gazing up at the top. Right away you get a rudimentary sense of the intelligence, the resources, and energy that took to build it. You also understand that the pyramid symbolizes the idea that anything is possible. All one has to do is take initiative. As we're looking up at the pyramid, there comes a point in every prisoner's time when they take a long and honest review of their life, and it is at that moment they realize it is going to require a strong will and sincere effort to rebuild it. This fact often discourages many prisoners and they stagnate themselves with a lack of self-confidence, complacency, and mental inertia even before trying. Old patterns die hard and not every prisoner is willing (or ready) to let go of what they have become accustomed to. We will be the first to admit that transformation is neither a quick or easy process. It calls for the full investment of your mind and body. Anything not congruent with your mission will be a distraction and hindrance toward defining your reality.

"We cannot afford to waste time in dealing with insoluble problems under impossible conditions." - Edward W. Blyden

The will deteriorates when the mind is not focused, and when your mind is not focused then your energy will be drained, and your response to your situation will be ineffective. Don't invest time or energy into people who are unreliable. The revolutionary George Jackson once commented, "When someone does not judiciously [and effectively] execute my affairs then I have every right to remove my bosom interest from their hands." In other words, you should not simply rely on the good intentions and benevolence of others. You should always be working toward self-efficiency. The facts we need to come to terms with when we come to prison include these: people change, people face hardships, and people die. Assessing your own abilities and strengthening them through education and discipline brings you closer to self-reliance. Action produces change, creates results, and eliminates obstacles. Inaction produces passivity, escapism, and excuses. Once you take the position that your life is being threatened, you psychologically prepare yourself to do battle. You get rid of your baggage. You become focused, and you arrive without compromise to accomplish your objectives.

"One who fears tomorrow has already died today." - Ajani Kamara

Prison is not the beginning of the end, but it can be the end of the mentality that got you there. You can build a viable step-by-step plan for success. How you play the endgame is up to you, but the moment you forget or ignore that you are on dying ground, you have already lost. Take your stand now, right where you are, and don't let anything hold you back. Here are five changes you should make that will strengthen your character and resolve:

1) Take initiative. Learn to depend on your own ability and intelligence.
2) Take responsibility for yourself. Become self-reliant.
3) Quit making excuses.
4) Don't assume people owe you something.
5) Stop holding onto the past.

Adaptation and change are inevitable and necessary. In prison we can waste away in the cycle of conflict, boredom, and reminiscing, or we can choose to fight and build.

"We're going to have to fight to win. The logic of procrastination has been destroyed." - George Jackson, Blood in My Eye

Favorite

Replies Replies feed

We will print and mail your reply by . Guidelines

Other posts by this author

Subscribe

Get notifications when new letters or replies are posted!

Posts by Byron Wilson: RSS email me
Comments on “Write Or Die”: RSS email me
Featured posts: RSS email me
All Between the Bars posts: RSS