DAILY JOURNAL
December 10-11, 2012

Monday December 10, 2012 6:24am: Just finished cleaning my cage, making my bunk, washing the floor etc. I didn't get up until 10 after 5. I think what woke me up is they came on the floor and yelled breakfast. It's like an oven in here, it's 64 degrees in here, and they have the damn heat on. The nurse just came through the back door. She's really nice. The back door is about 3 foot from where I'm sitting writing here at my desk. I get woke up a lot with that door getting slammed. Last night we didn't have our normal sgt or CO working down here. Well, I need to shave then catch the world news and write a letter and then figure out what to do next. In 36 hours Manny will be dead, by this time they will be pronouncing his death and the witnesses will be leaving from witnessing this crap, and the clean up of the death chamber will begin.
9:04am: I haven't accomplished anything. I started a letter, and didn't get any further than the opening. I was going to work on some more stationery, that didn't last long. I'm still just mentally run down. Maybe it's the holidays combined with Manny's execution tomorrow. We are a really sick people, mentally screwed up! I don't think I could do an execution. Just think about it, you see the victim, talk to them, get to know them, and you understand it's not a monster you're fixing to kill, just a fallible human being that's made some bad mistakes for one reason or another, drugs, mental problems etc. You see the victim's family and witness the interaction and the love between them, and then you have to take this human being, strap him or her to a table, chair, gurney and intentionally kill them. Where they know they're going to die, and for the 30 to 45 days leading up to killing them, they are reminded each and every day of their imminent death. That's sick and f-ing twisted. No serial killer in the history of the world has come close to doing something so demented as this! Nope - I couldn't participate in such a sick and twisted act, putting another human being through that, much less putting that person's family through the horror of such a barbaric and inhuman act. People will say, "but look what he did!" Yeah - so you drop your standards and become what you detest. You become an inhumane barbaric killer, only you hide behind this facade of justice, and commit a far more barbaric act. 'Cause this is the highest form of premeditated killing that there ever will be.
11:00am: I was just writing a blog, "Extermination under the mantle of justice". Just trying to make people think about what we're doing here, killing men and women, exterminating human beings and trying to justify it.
12:29pm: Damn, this is a hell of a way to be feeling all the time. Manny is down to 29 1/2 hours left to live. He's getting his last visit today. His family will leave there in tears, crying their hearts out, sobbing over this last visit before the great state of Florida exterminates their loved one. He will get his last meal today, only because tomorrow will be chaotic. I can see what's going to be happening. Everything's on lockdown. The inmates who work only come out to feed the prisons on lockdown all day. The dinner will be served before 3pm, so they can get those inmates locked back up. All the officers are in class A uniforms, which means long shirts and clip on ties. Yeah - it's one great big production, the legalized extermination of another living human being. Some really sick crap. Humanity my ass! I'd like to be the last person to ever be executed in this country. I know that won't happen, but it sure would be nice.
3:24pm: Just been laying down, here again today, I have not accomplished a thing. Right now it's extremely dark outside. Looks as if there's a bad storm coming. I was just thinking that I hope to get some mail tonight, then I thought, tonight is the last night that Manny will get mail. He's got 26 1/2 hours left to live, wonder what's going through his mind. Wonder what's going through his family's mind. I bet there's a lot of tears being shed, and all because "we seek revenge through a dirty syringe".
4:58pm: I have my dinner heating up in a bag, all it is is beans and rice. I'm fixing to lay back, watch the news and wait on showers. After showers I'm going to bed. They can wake me up if I have any mail. In 25 hours, Manny will be in the death chamber and he will have just minutes to live. Exterminated by his fellow man.

Tuesday December 11, 2012 5:24am: Manny has 12 1/2 hours to live, barring any stays, and I don't see that happening. All I can do is think about his family and what they must be going through. It must be hell on them. I seen a program in the 90s, 20/20, 48 Hours, one of them shows, and when the guy was executed, the mother ran out of her apt., fell down on the grass and began sobbing. It was heartbreaking to see. I think about that mother during every execution. Even if the person the state is exterminating is guilty and that's not always the case, but even if they are it's the family of that person, that is truly being punished. And two wrongs doesn't make it right. All we teach here is violence justifies violence. 'Cause no matter how pretty you try to make these executions, death is always ugly. And violence breeds violence. You without fault, cast the first stone. 'Cause none of us are without fault, it's just some have smaller skeletons in their closets than others. And some have their skeletons buried so deep in their closets that no one knows about them. Maybe one day, this will all come to an end. I need to figure out what all I'm going to do today. I received some comments so I'll reply to them and get them out of here Thursday night, Friday morning when I send this out.
7:00am: Eleven hours to live, this will be the last morning he ever wakes up. The last day of his miserable life. The humane thing to do for the individual and their family is to just kill them and get it over with. When the appeals are over they should just walk up here to the cell front, with the witnesses pull out a gun and shoot me. That's far more humane than making an individual, a human f-ing being, and their loved ones count down the last 30 to 45 days of their lives. You have to be a real idiot not to see that this crap is not just cruel and unusual punishment for the human being that you're exterminating from this world, but it's cruel and unusual punishment on that person's loved ones. 'Cause this isn't like you notify the loved ones of a death. No! They have to sit there helplessly and count down the remaining days and hours of their loved one. You're torturing the hell out of family members who are innocent victims who happen to have a loved one who may or may not have made a bad mistake. 'Cause again, not everyone who gets this needle shoved in their arm is guilty! Society is sick and twisted, and justices like that sick ass Clarence Thomas, Uncle Tom FM, is the major part of the problem. Personally he can take my appeals, and his sorry ass judicial opinions, which are biased, and he can shove them up his ass! I do get mad about this crap, 'cause it's all a fraud. Oh well, America will keep murdering its citizens, inflicting heartache and pain on families, 'cause that's the American way, seeking revenge through this dirty ass syringe.
7:55am: The officers are pulling recreation right now. And as we all know, I can't go 'cause former warder Barry V. Reddish was an unethical criminal jackass! Manny is down to ten hours left to live. His family is probably awake by now. They're probably extremely stressed out knowing their father, son, brother etc is going to be killed in ten hours. Just imagine what Manny's family is going through. How sick they must feel. That's no doubt a sick helpless feeling... knowing your loved one is fixing to die, and there's not a damn thing that you can do to prevent it, you just have to sit and count down the hours and let them pass and allow your loved one to be exterminated by the great state of FLA. We are one sick nation. Humanity! Where?! 'Cause all I see is the lack of humanity, a very barbaric unforgiving nation.
10:25am: Manny is down to 7 1/2 hours. I was just sitting here reading and replying to comments and I ran across one from John who's talking about his addiction to painkillers. People are reading comments, they do it all the time, I've seen people comment on comments. This cat's telling everyone he's got a problem, and not one soul has commented and offered some type of assistance, some type of advice on what he should do. I'm none too happy about this, 'cause that's the problem right there. This is John's cry for help. He's telling everyone on the Internet of his problem. Where the hell is the compassion. Why hasn't someone reached out and offered some advice... tell him where he should go, give him a phone number to call, a website to visit, SOMETHING! Come on, damn, are we not human? I'll be sending this out tonight. Normally I don't send this out until Thursday night. But I want to get John some help, so I need this posted ASAP. This burns my ass, 'cause I know someone has read his comment and yet no help.
11:04am: They're bringing the guys back in from recreation. In seven hours Manny will be in the death chamber, laying there, witnesses looking at him, the deadly cocktail will be flowing into his body and he will be moments away from death. Family will be standing in the parking lot sobbing their hearts out. Yeah - one big mess.
11.48am: I'm on PBS5.2 and there's a cabinet meeting and Pam Bondi the Attorney General and Governor Rick Scott is there taking care of business, as Manny's poor family is out there crying their eyes out. Bondi and Scott haven't given them a second thought. Scott probably gets off on the power he has to kill people. 'Cause he holds life and death in his hands, yes, today December 11, 2012 Governor Rick Scott gets to play God. The ultimate power to take a human life. My, my, my, how sick are we.
12:32pm: In 5 1/2 hours Manny will be in the death chamber. Right now he's on Q-Wing First Floor, the left side in one of three cells that's just feet away from the big gray sliding steel door, that on the other side is Florida's death chamber, and its machinery of death. He's probably spending time now with his spiritual advisor. I don't know if I'd even have one of them. Actually I will, just to make sure my last blogs make it out and get posted. I'll then want a witness who can put on my blog how the execution went and what they seen. I've selected the electric chair over lethal injection.
4:13pm: Two more hours and Manny will be laying there unconscious, just moments away from death. Shove a needle in his arm and kill him, that's a real intelligent solution, just exterminate a man or woman.
5:47pm: I was just watching the news and they said that the execution is set for 6pm. They showed some of those bloodthirsty vultures who set outside ESP and support and desire these murders. Bet if it was their loved one being exterminated by the state they'd have a change of heart. But those sick twisted individuals just want someone to die. That's just the sick ass mentality of some inhuman beings. Manny is no doubt in the execution chamber. Staff are minutes away from pulling the curtain open, they will then read the death warrant, ask Manny if he has any last words and then they will begin the killing.
6:05pm: Sick situation - murdering under the mantle of justice. What really gets to me is the bloodthirsty vengeful vultures sitting out there cheering on death. That's real humane of them.
6:45pm: Guess it's over, another human being exterminated by America.