Ronald W. Clark
April 12, 2013

Compassion
Mercy
Love.

We as human's often lack compassion mercy and love. And who am I to tell other's we should show this toward's our fellow man. When I'm filled with hate toward's the former warden Barry V. Reddish. I've never hated anyone as much as him. It's one of my many fault's. When I feel that I've been victimized, it's just natural for me to hate rather than to forgive. But when I see a friend suffer, it hurt's my heart. Last night I received a letter from one of my Christian friends who got some hateful comments on the blog because of comment's she left. I haven't read the comment's. They usually take a couple of week's to reach me. But I think we should show some compassion mercy and love in our comments. Agree to disagree, but please don't be hateful toward's one another. We're all fallible human being's caught up in this life that we don't undertand, and we grab at different thing's to help us survive. Mine is Prozac. haha. But other's need their religious faith's. I lost my faith, and I showed you why. Which I'm regreting doing. I tried to stay away from that.

I have a lot of issue's, you see just some of what I've had to deal with in life in my essay's. a lot of guilt a lot of regret. and what that Christian school did to me, was nothing short of child abuse. I remember it like it was yesterday. Just thinking about my Bigma suffering made rage boil up. Cause no child should have to picture their loved one in hell worm's coming out of their flesh, skin melting from the heat. That was just not appropreated to show children. Not at all! It effected me differently as a child; cause instead of wanting to escape hell and go to heaven, I wanted to harm God, who was torturing my Bigma. so I walked out of there with pure hate towards God, and I cussed him for everything a little ten year old boy could.

Fallible human's did that, and we all make mistakes. To those who have no faith, please be kind to those who have faith. Most of us just want to be loved, we need love, we need to be shown compassion and mercy. I lack faith as most of us do, cause most people who claim to have faith lie. they say they do, to be part of a group. they want to be accepted and loved, and they find that within that group of faith based people.

Tuesday April 9, one of the Christian volunteer's came through. I talk with them, and they know I don't have faith and why I don't. But he asked to pray with me. I could have been rude and said "Get out of here." But I had compassion for him and if it helped him, I figured "Why not?" It didn't hurt anything, and I said sure you can pray for me, but you know I don't have faith. He prayed that God would show himself to me as was the case with Paul.

All I'm saying is be more compassionated toward's one another. ya'll have seen alot of negative comment's here. I try not to write back insulting people. I've been dead wrong in the way I handled Warden Reddish. I let hate over ride not just compassion mercy love and understanding for my fellow man, I let it over ride common sense. When I heard the rumor's the officer's were spreading, I seen a chance to go after and verbally attack a man that has complete controll of my life. my life was in his hand's and I hated him so much that I spit in the face of death and went after him. And look at the price I paid, and the people I love paid.

When I was talking with Warden Reddish in June 2011 at medical, and he told me he was a Christian, I judged him, and I laughed at him. He said "What's so funny you don't believe me?" I laughed and said "No." That wasn't smart. Yes I know the biblical text, and the true qualities Christians are to have. He was agreeing to completely restore my contact visit's, but my hate toward's him over road everything, and its still eating at me.

Look, please just agree to disagree and be more loving compassionate and merciful toward's one another. For we are all fallible human being's, and love conquers all. Take care and be good to one another.

In Peace and Love
Ronnie [smiley face]