March 19, 2014

I'm Glad I Have Kids!

From The Novelist Portent by Johnny E. Mahaffey (author's profile)

Transcription

The Novelist Portent

JOHNNY MAHAFFEY SAYS:
"I'm Glad I Have Kids!"

03.08.14

Seriously, my kids are what get me through the day; and I can't imagine a world without them.

Here's a cascade poem I wrote today:

My writer daughter,
she makes me so proud--
my love for her heart

that soars the clouds.
Ellie-Fiona,
my writer daughter,

with stories and poems
to flow like water.
She makes me so proud,

looking beyond circumstance;
for meaningful thoughts from
my love for her heart.

I think I'll call that one, "Angelellie"-- it suits it.

One of the prisons here in S.C. just had its first father daughter dance, and one day this one may to--I hope it does, because that would be very good for the kids, and their fathers. I was told by one of the wardens, that at the other prison, one of the kids--that had the mother's permission--wanted to attend, but couldn't procure a ride, and hitchhiked. I wouldn't want any of my kids to go that far, but still, it's a touching story.

Being a parent is a gift, one many of us squander; myself included. I just hope I can do right by them over time, I'll keep working and perhaps something good will come of it all. I've now founded the "Correctional Writer's Initiative, CWI," (the name could change, it's still in its early stages) and instead of teaching English 101 to pre-GED students as I did in the past, I'm now teaching a Creative Writing course at a college level to high school/GED diploma holders. This gives other inmates incentive to get a GED! My class helps to teach these guys to better articulate themselves, perhaps helping to even the bridge gaps between themselves and their own children.

Those lucky enough to have them.

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Replies (4) Replies feed

Eleanor_Anne Posted 7 years, 8 months ago. ✓ Mailed 7 years, 8 months ago   Favorite
~Johnny
That is a very wonderful poem and I thank you. In all honesty it took me a moment to notice that you wrote of me. Mostly because it's….shocking I guess? er better yet, unexpected rather than shocking. Mom always speaks of you whenever I post/reply to you. She has a real talent on making people feel guilty for something they should not. I speak to you even though I know of your mistakes. I know what your capable of but it does not scare me. I use to have nightmares (ones mom never knew of so shh) In those nightmares you aren't some monster. What I saw never give me fear but sorrow to take it's place. Up until maybe 7 I had a hard time accepting that you wasn't in my life. I would day dream of having a father but when night came and I awoke, again and again, without a father, I'd cry.
I can blame you for many things and I use to. Because you wasn't there for me (nor any of your children) I became cautious, emotionless or even depressed. I could blame you but I don't nor will I. I am in control of my reactions not you. I will say because of your stupidity and unfaithfulness I am smart about trusting guys :) I do admit I have trust issues with…well everyone except one person (I will not include his/her name) I have many flaws and made plenty of mistakes but I'm learning from them.
Sometimes I wish you could just meet me. Not through the mail nor on the internet but face to face. Of course I'm not sure you would like me but I'm sure you'll have fun. I'm…off I guess. I'm nerdy and honest. If you only saw how I spend my Sundays (after cartoons of course) hmm, I feel as if I'm typing to much :/ I forget who I'm talking to sometimes. Oh! hehe I wished to ask you if any of your other children speak to you :) I know it's not any of my business but I'm curious *shrugs* and one last thing. I would like to know if you would want a picture of me and mickie. I know that you probably have no idea as to what me and Mitch looks like so eh, thought I could offer. Assuming it's otay with mom…grr. I wish you could see Connor :) He use to look like me and mom but after he turned 15 his face changed. He looks so much like you now it's scary. Mitch also looks like you but she's always been that way. I'm now the odd ball :l I could pass as a tall, skinny Opal now O_O What has this world come to….


~Eleanor_Anne

#thisgirlcares Posted 7 years, 8 months ago. ✓ Mailed 7 years, 8 months ago   Favorite
The poem about your daughter was beautifully written:) You've found such a creative way to support your children while in prison. Your words, your love, and your example of making the best of a negative situation, are all such strong support beams. Stay Strong!

#thisgirlcares

Johnny E. Mahaffey Posted 7 years, 7 months ago.   Favorite
(scanned reply – view as blog post)

RavenJaws Posted 3 years, 8 months ago. ✓ Mailed 3 years, 8 months ago   Favorite
Hey Johnny, I noticed in many of your past blogs, you typically reply to nearly every person that comments. Ellie commented on this, and you didn't reply. I am willing to bet that it's because it got lost somewhere like you mentioned before. I I have a mighty hope that this gets to you:

~Johnny
That is a very wonderful poem and I thank you. In all honesty it took me a moment to notice that you wrote of me. Mostly because it's….shocking I guess? er better yet, unexpected rather than shocking. Mom always speaks of you whenever I post/reply to you. She has a real talent on making people feel guilty for something they should not. I speak to you even though I know of your mistakes. I know what your capable of but it does not scare me. I use to have nightmares (ones mom never knew of so shh) In those nightmares you aren't some monster. What I saw never give me fear but sorrow to take it's place. Up until maybe 7 I had a hard time accepting that you wasn't in my life. I would day dream of having a father but when night came and I awoke, again and again, without a father, I'd cry.
I can blame you for many things and I use to. Because you wasn't there for me (nor any of your children) I became cautious, emotionless or even depressed. I could blame you but I don't nor will I. I am in control of my reactions not you. I will say because of your stupidity and unfaithfulness I am smart about trusting guys :) I do admit I have trust issues with…well everyone except one person (I will not include his/her name) I have many flaws and made plenty of mistakes but I'm learning from them.
Sometimes I wish you could just meet me. Not through the mail nor on the internet but face to face. Of course I'm not sure you would like me but I'm sure you'll have fun. I'm…off I guess. I'm nerdy and honest. If you only saw how I spend my Sundays (after cartoons of course) hmm, I feel as if I'm typing to much :/ I forget who I'm talking to sometimes. Oh! hehe I wished to ask you if any of your other children speak to you :) I know it's not any of my business but I'm curious *shrugs* and one last thing. I would like to know if you would want a picture of me and mickie. I know that you probably have no idea as to what me and Mitch looks like so eh, thought I could offer. Assuming it's otay with mom…grr. I wish you could see Connor :) He use to look like me and mom but after he turned 15 his face changed. He looks so much like you now it's scary. Mitch also looks like you but she's always been that way. I'm now the odd ball :l I could pass as a tall, skinny Opal now O_O What has this world come to….

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