May 1, 2012

Edan's Fall - Chapter 4

by Sarah Luedecke (author's profile)

Transcription

I've been working on Eden's Fall for a while now. To me it's my greatest creation. I will put little pieces of my chapters in this blog in the hope someone finds them and it peaks their interest. My greatest ambition is to be a published author but this may not happen to long as I am where I am. My hopes and dreams are beyond this place. I am currently in school for writing for children and teenagers works. But this book is not that type of work. It has its darker points. It's got a little bit of everything so I don't really know which genre to classify it in. If anyone has any ideas let me know.

SECTION FROM "Eden's Fall"
Part of Chapter 4

I was completly still as I continued to listen to my maker's voice, but how could any words or actions atone for my own actions?

"But your actions can not go unpunished. Nor you can you be allowed to remain in heaven."

"Father," Gabriel asked, "is it possible to not punish Eden as severely as Lucifer and his abilities or emotions in which he was created with still remain intact? Let his beauty remain to a point but transform him into something else?"

"Although Gabriel, you are too young to fully understand what it is you have asked it will be done according to your request. Eden your name will no longer be as such but instead Nephilim Fallun. You will no longer see the sunshine or feel the warmth of it but instead live for eternity at night, in darkness and cold.

"You will be a desolate wanderer and to survive you will feed off my greatest creation – mankind. Their blood will sustain your life, for without it you will surely die. You will be known as a vampire. Your beauty will be your greatest enemy as it draws the humans to you but once they look upon you it will be the last thing they see with their eyes. Your hunger will overpower you causing you to feed upon them and their very life blood. This is your punishment. Upon your own shoulders alone shall you endure it. Until eternity is no more to the Earth I cast you."

I feel unbearable pain come from within myself. The pain inside me made my earlier agony seem almost nonexistant. I looked at my maker with pleasing eyes and then to Gabriel. I saw Gabriel's mouth move.

"I'm sorry," was the only words I saw uttered from Gabriel's mouth before everything went black.

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Replies (4) Replies feed

LisaHeard Posted 12 years, 6 months ago. ✓ Mailed 11 years, 7 months ago   Favorite
Thanks for writing! I finished the transcription for your post.

This definitely comes under the fantasy genre by the way.

Sarah Luedecke Posted 12 years, 5 months ago.   Favorite
(scanned reply – view as blog post)

LisaHeard Posted 12 years, 5 months ago. ✓ Mailed 11 years, 7 months ago   Favorite
Actually I happen to proofread/copy-edit voluntarily sometimes so I could possibly have a look. Sorry, can't help you with publishers though.

Sarah Luedecke Posted 12 years, 3 months ago.   Favorite
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