06-12-12

Howdy!

Well, today is a melancholy kinda day. Today was my anniversary with my former life partner, Ken. The last I heard from him—years ago—he told someone that he still considers us together but, considering the way he's acted, I just don't see it.

Ken and I were both arrested, and he is serving a term of life in prison. The last I heard he was in a federal prison in Arizona, but that may have changed. I never hear from him. In all these years, the only contact we have had is because of my efforts, despite the fact that he has a lot more support. He's never tried to contact me and never done—anything. It's all been up to me.

There is a separation order against us so we can't write directly and can never be in the same prison. Other couples, etc., are allowed to write each other. I think we could possibly get that lifted, but it would take a concerted effort on both our parts to do that and, as I've said, he leaves everything up to me and doesn't show that he cares at all.

It would be so much easier if we would be at the same place and even writing would be nice. Well, I'm not going to do it all by myself. If he loves me so much, he should act like it.

I do miss him and this really sucks. I shouldn't have paid any attention to the date.

I got some more bad news today, no surprises there. I had an appeal in the 8th Circuit Court of Appeals to fight a "shot" (incident report) I received in which I lost 27 days "good time." It was for the "talking in code" on the phone where I was accused of sending a jailhouse attorney some money for legal work. This was based on taped phone calls which they edited to delete any references to ABC Paralegals with whom I was working, so they're (the BOP) saying that any references to an attorney are really an inmate.

The Court of Appeals is ignoring the due process violations in which the BOP won't let me get the phone transcripts and the BOP didn't follow their rules in the Code of Federal Regulations regarding the hearing, and they even filed false documents in the district court. The COA ruled that because there's "some evidence" of guilt (the edited phone transcripts), then that's all that matters. There is no justice in this country.

So get this: in the 8th Circuit, they have ruled that the BOP doesn't have to follow its own rules and regulations, that a prison staff member can write a false incident report and it still counts as "some evidence" (I can supply case references), and now it doesn't even matter if they violate your due process—the BOP can do whatever it wants and the 8th Circuit will uphold it. Those judges are insane and criminal.

06-18-12
Well... let's see. I'm still frustrated as hell over legal work, but I've been taking after my heroine, Scarlett, and putting it off till tomorrow.

A new guy cam elast week from the "Deuce" (the medium-high) and he is "family" (gay) and a Wiccan with many years of experience. We've been hanging out and he's helping me to read my Tarot cards. He's been a big help with that.

On Wednesday is Litha, the Summer Solstice. The magickal time of Midsummer. Plus there's a New Moon tomorrow—a time of new beginnings. I love Midsummer—I just wish I could go outside at night and really enjoy it.

My new friend, Ken, told me briefly about a guy he knew that he had been writing that he met in prison. I guess this guy was on probation and was a sex offender and, due to a number of problems, he was facing return to prison. So this guy killed himself to avoid being sent back to prison. Horrible. I'm trying to get Ken to start writing here 'cause that story should be told properly and it's not my story. I hope he will.

Please don't get confused with the two kens in this letter—they're separate people.

I'm still trying to get Pam to find a store to sell crocheted stuff, but it's hard to get her to follow through. I think she gave up on her website. I did send some things to Black and Pink, but so far no luck there either.

I'm so tired of living.

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