Reply ID: Blog4HR
#110

Dear Readers of Prometheus Writes!
Created 1 Jan. 2013 by Nate A. Lindell

Greetings mes amies, my mates, my peeps, my hecklers, + my little monsters too!

First... I was gonna try to come up with some witty New Year's quip. But all I can think of is try not to do or get done in a mass shooting. Odds are ya won't, but... damn, like Lurch said in a recent letter: "Not the kids". And Taylor, don't be torturing Sean's toddlers (more on that at the end).

Second, cool that you're all reading, but why has only Silent Ghost read + commented on my earlier posts? #10 was a finalist in P.E.N.'s prisoner essay contest, + two committee members wrote me to say it should've won a prize. I assure you, my early posts are good reads. if ya like 'em, transcribe 'em + tell me! :)

*Benj* THANKS! Finished The Mind's I, at pg. 71 of The Society of Mind. Each is saturated with my scribbled criticisms, inspirations, etc. My only concern is that I don't know where tech is currently at, nor cogni' philosophy, so I might come up with stuff that's PASSE. The accompanying cogni'-sci' post is but the beginning. Please let the nerd mafia know. :) Seems a worthwhile challenge, aside from my multiple pending lawsuits, artistic endeavors, history + sociological studies, + efforts to dig myself out of this hole... or to Australia. :)

Please provide explicit info on your "community standards", because mine are along the lines of: attack me, it's time for war crimes. My blog is meant for mature minds only, which, as SAH + Taylor have shown, excludes some adults (+ may include some children).

Thanks for clarifying what Sean + I can post. Yeah, few judges write well; when they do, it tends to be because they're dumping on a convict or defendant (in one case, a death penalty case, a judge quoted Shakespeare's "To be, or not to be" soliloquy, then upheld the d.p. - but THAT'S not psychopathic...)

At least 2,000 people saw my ad on writeaprisoner.com, which tells 'em to see my blog. I'm on 'til Sept. 2014. That's just 5 months. It behooves Sean to pimp my blog, so he does. I'm mainly telling activists, artists + litigators... Later, my best.

*Quiet Ghost* Thanks for your pledge of support. You're the first who's offered to help my broke butt with postage + Net fairy duty (see post #40 "Will You Be My Internet Fairy?", the rest of you readers). You're also the first to go back + read my early posts. I hope YOU stick around + holler if *I* can help you in any way.

The economy's changing, shrinking, due to CAFTA, NAFTA, Neo-Cons + Neo-Coms (New Communists), and some readers have kids, bills, etc. BUT, if someone wants to + can be charitable, I dare to say I'm deserving: NOBODY in WI has fought the D.O.C. harder in court; I've fought with my hands, feet + fermented urine + feces too; I've got several guys out of this joint who were illegally here; don't do dope nor drink; study my ass off; try to help straighten up young convicts who are getting out - what I get as far as support goes to litigation + writing.

If you're Bill Gates - hey, call these people + verify my debts (608) 375-5656 (around 11,000$ now), + write off what you make in an hour in interest.

If you're poor - postage-embossed envelopes are only a couple bucks. See my profile page for how to order them (this is NOT meant for any single mothers, who better not buy me anything - take care of your kids!). Single moms... transcribe a post + help with internet-fairy work, costs nothing. :)

Help a Honkie out! Because I'm white + competent + have a long history of being a White Nationalist affiliated with the Aryan Circle, but NOT a hater, just a lover of my culture + race, most prisoner-activists scorn me (explained a bit in posts #49 + 36), while citing MY winning cases in their legal papers :). What seems even more pathetic to me is how those who've hijacked the reins to the A.C. have used + then discarded some of the best of us, guys + gals any of you could trust your kids or spouse with, selfless true blue heroes, and drug it down into the gutter with other organizations that prey on rather than build up my people. But that's another story...

Sorry for my digression. Pissed off. It's a complex subject I WILL discuss soon. In the meantime, reserve your assumptions, please...

Greed is a major reason the system is as heartless as it is. That's my point. I dare to say I'm not greedy, but am needy. Fear is another reason - I lack fear 'cause I have so nothing to lose. The individual is afraid of what the system will do to them, so they remain... silent ghosts. Comprehendez vous?

Anyhoo, Silent Ghost, if you go back to the beginning of my blog + post a comment on each separate post that has not already been commented on, so that I can verify what all I've posted, this alone would be great. Transcribe what you will, inform other websites I indicate for specific posts about them (as well as those you think might be interested). Post my profile page (+#44, "Social Networking Profile...") where you will.

Send me a pic' of your loved one or you or whoever, + I'll draw you up a cool portrait - my way of thanking you! :) Let me know if I can post it here too, + of any changes (additions or subtractions) you want me to make in what I draw.

You're right - "...it's almost like the qualities that make one human are being squashed out". How about this:

"What Prison Is"
Each petal of my soul
Plucked slowly.

But few people want to feel such pain, so they pretend it's a game when we claim to feel it; otherwise they'd feel impelled to help ease it, look for answers. Excuses are easier, less painful. A la the Good Samaritan story - those who passed by had excuses.

Yet, as someone I really admire said: "The heart feels best when it beats for others", or something like that, said by Pat Craig, the founder + director of thewildanimalsanctuary.com, wildanimalsanctuary.org, possibly one of MY favorite groups of people + a hero. Too bad people seem to lack the concern for those of their own species that they can show for animals of other species: NO prisoner activists are as dedicated as they are!

URGENT! Forget me for now. Please look at my 77th post, the crazed comments to it, + my + Sean Riker's replies (posts #100 + 102 + 106). PLEASE help those kids. Tell Pat Craig, to help those people cubs (they live in Fort Collins, CO, not far from Pat), + everyone else (e.g. Americanhumane.org - they're outta CO too + help peepimals too, particular abused kids) you can enlist. This ain't about Sean, but the kids. Please post a comment about what ya did/do + then read on...

Okay, thanks! Still ain't heard from you 'though, nor received envelopes. Tell ya when I do. :)

So, yeah - once the Prison Industrial Government or Prison-Industry Goons (P.I.G. :) ) has torn all the petals from prisoners (many of whom, like those poor kids above, had some petals already torn from them or stunted by sick adults), then, when what remains is... ugly, then the "good people", the "beautiful people" (as M.M. called them), throw up their hands, say "What can be done - we tried our best", and bury 'em in a supermax, put 'em on death row, or otherwise hide the evidence of their own wickedness + hypocrisy. The peon guards + other lower-ranking P.I.G. parts play along, saying - "I'm just doing my job... boy, I hope I can get some more overtime!"

Well, I've decided recently, "I'm just doing my job", as hard as I can. And I was already goin' hard! :) Everything else I never had or they took it away... except my brain. :)

You'll have noticed from watching that Nat'Geo documentary + Rolling Stone article (please print off + send me a copy of that, with the author's name + contact info, snail mail, so I can reply to it!) that a lot of prisoners are already broken; they were "rescued" rather than "arrested". Calling most of the guys around me "supercriminals" would be ridiculous; they are actually crazier than guys I met at the state's mental hospitals (+ I've been to both... another story). One guy here does EVERYTHING possible with his poop - paints with it, eats it, wraps it up like a baby + coddles it, squatted in front of me, pooped in his hand... and THEY say he's "playing" crazy!

Dude blew MY mind + that ain't easy. If he's "playing" crazy, give him a f-ing Emmy!

Even me, I assure you - some of my marbles are lost + I can't see 'em rolling back in my bag... My problem is I'm smart, funny, + been through much worse than these jokers can dish out. About the worst they can do is leave me in a cold cell, naked, with only a vulcanized rubber mat for three days, which they've done twice in about as many months.

We get used to the shit, so they try + make it stinkier, + we get more calloused, or finally break + go crazy, or cope by becoming psychopathic/emotionless. Part of me is still desperately reaching out; the rest gave up + went psychopathic/emotionless a couple years ago. C'est la vie.

It's been nice to meet all you people 'though. But you're too few. They're too many. C'est la morte.

The people running the P.I.G. are ruthless hypocrites, often "good Christians", who might as well be robots... programmed in violation of Asimov's laws of robotics (i.e. not to hurt people), but not deserving of the term artificial intelligence (although they are artificial...) Racist - ha! Classist - ya! They'll use whoever they can.

The hacks/screws/guards often are as broken as the mass of prisoners. Generally, they're either desperate for work, or are sadists, or are religious extremists, or are sexual predators (homo + hetero, male + female). They break their own laws all the time. E.G. Bieber v. W.D.O.C., 62 Fed. Appx. 714 (7th Cir. 2003). (Despite being excused by the W.S.P.F. doctor from having to kneel because of a painfully shifting/catching knee, when Bieber refused to kneel to be unshackled, guards T. Belz and W. Brown choked Bieber, pulled his feet in the air by his shackles, causing Bieber's wrist to be broken because it was secured to the cell door by another manacle - in ths unpublished opinion, the court upheld the dismissal of Bieber's 8th Amendment excessive force claim because Bieber failed to prove his claim, then upheld the lower court's decision to deny Bieber appointment of the attorney he needed to prove his claim); Keller v. Trefz, 66 Fed. Appx. 44 (7th Cir. 2003) (similar case, guy with H.I.V. got his wrist broke for no reason). Sometimes a judge will say something like,

...we must express our frustration with the way some employees of the Department [of Corrections] continue to ignore the Department's own rules. 1... our reading of Anderson-E1 indicates to us that the Supreme Court [of Wisconsin] is similarly frustrated... The laxity evident in some of the Department's employees causes an understaffed and underfunded attorney general's office to spend countless hours defending these employees' actions and wastes precious judicial resources... Taxpayer dollars are needlessly expended... [What about YEARS spent in this supermax due to such antics?]

State ex rel. Anderson v. Gamble, 647 N.W. 2d 402, 404 (Wis. Appt 2002), or,

...The federal and state case law surrounding this issue proves voluminous and the Court puzzles over the Respondent's [sic - the W.DO.C.] refusal to accept the decisions of the United States Supreme Court regarding this matter.

State ex rel. Daniel Harr v. Gerald Berge [former W.S.P.F. warden], Dane County Circuit Court, Branch 17, Case No. 02-CV-1131, page 1 of memorandum + order dated 7 October 2002.

Those judges were trying to be nice, because they look at the W.D.O.C. as their relative, a little brother... the retarded one who huffs gas + jerks off in public.

Like I explained in p. 11 of my 13th post, "Fraud + Fiscal Profligacy within the Wisconsin Department of Corrections...", prison staff + officials don't pay for the suits we file + win against them. So why should they care?

Joe Citizen has more pressing concerns than what goes on in the belly of the Beast. The P.I.G. makes sure of that. Industrial propaganda by Our Ford (read Aldous Huxley's Brave New World...) keeps the voters occupied working more hours, so they can buy shinier shit than the Joneses, which consumes their attention just maintaining all their things, costs more money to upkeep, meaning they gotta work more hours... sorta like that 80s anti-cocaine commercial ("I gotta work more hours, so I can buy more cocaine, so I can work more hours...); if it's things, it's okay, I guess.

This is WAY longer than I intended. But, good, right?

Oh, please don't think me an innocent or an angel. I'm just trying to have the courage to do what I believe is right. And, after a few weeks shy of 12 years in solitary confinement, told I'll never leave; I'm at total war with the P.I.G. It will get ugly. No way I can live on my knees.

Look forward to your letter. Thank you for caring. Happy Yule + New Years to you + your loved ones.

*EPOO* Thanks for your transcription! See my earlier posts, + welcome aboard!

*arcadiaego* Thank you too for your transcriptions.

See #17, part of a morbid musical I never finished. Imagine my 6'3" skinny self high-stepping + singing that! I did for Dr. Cavegirl, a shrink here, had her DYING!

Re: the weird visuals I see post sleep. If I'm "seeing" the back of my retina, then WHAT is seeing it, given that it's our retinas that allow us to see with our brains (specifically the occipital lobe). "See" how this raises the question of who "I" is, what a "self" is? Because it's the self that's ultimately "seeing" the patterns.

Another post will get into what I believe our selves consist of/are. As for the visuals my self sees, I suspect it's the part of my brain that interprets the nerve impulses sent from my optical nerves (i.e. the occipital lobe), which I suspect is either: a) bored from lack of stimuli to process, thus is "doodling", or; b) the rods + cones at the back of my retina are, for whatever reason, hypersensitive + firing off nerve impulses to my occipital lobe, which my occipital lobe sees as those weird/cool designs.

The eye is a wondrous organ, but what our brains do with our eyes...

I thought also that POSSIBLY, but unlikely: Is this my mind's eye at play? Is my mind's eye merely the creation of my occipital lobe, or the product of my whole brain working with its various parts? Could what I'm seeing be the "language" of my brain? Could I create a computer or human language using such symbols, which vary in their design like snowflakes; and how would it work? See, computers "think with two symbols, "O" or "I", "on" or "off" - what if humans (some anyway) "think" with endlessly complex patterns, that are always being modified, added to, subtracted from, in NUMEROUS dimensions (e.g. color, size, length, directionality, tone...); if so, how the f' could we hope to create human-like intelligence with computers that only use "O" + "I"; HOW can we make computers with such a complex symbolic language as our brains MIGHT use?

I shouldn't say "might". According to Douglas B. Hofstadter (see http://prelectur.stanford/edu/lecturers/hofstadter/analogy/html, which Benj @ BtB kindly provided me with :) ), human cognition is purely analogy making. In other words, we're born with, more or less (see my post #99, "The Ingredients to Our Personalities", for clarification), a blank mind; as we live, we experience things that register in our brain, creating our mind. For example, one of our first experiences is "mom", or, earlier yet, "womb", which we don't know as a word but as a collection of experiences: warmth, comfort, nourishment, etc. Experiences that follow build upon "womb", "mom". So, "dad", if we had a dad in our lives, would be "mom": but with, e.g., a prickly face (beard stubble), a deeper voice, harder flesh, stronger hands, bigger hands, etc. The more a human grows, the more complex a person's analogies CAN become, if their brain's capable of it + they aren't mentally oppressed.

What does this have to do with those weird visuals I see? Well, they're like the analogies that constitute our minds, as well as the neurons that connect with each other in myriad ways (+ modify their connections with each other) in order to "absorb" the experiences we have that create those analogies.

I'm not saying I'm seeing those neuronal connections, but I sure have been thinking about them, + consciousness/cognition in general! Somehow, these endlessly complex neuronal connections (+ each neuron possesses multiple dimensions, MORE than the dozen or so each of the patterns I see possess) create the endlessly complex analogies that constitute a mind.

There seems to be a... connection.

Anyhoo, do not hesitate to share your thoughts. This goes for all of you readers. If I disagree, don't take it personal, as I'm told women tend to do. And likewise for me if you find + point out a flaw in my reasoning or conclusions. Fearless, bold thinking + debate are needed for US to discover deeper truths, which is the core purpose of Prometheus Writes!

*Nicki* Almost last, but not least. :) Sean got your letter + X-mas card, says thanks, but he can't afford postage to reply. Says he may soon be back on BtB + will holler then. Instead of writing him long letters or even sending cards, he hopes you will actively try + help his kids by telling the media etc. about what's going on. This may not satisfy YOUR emotional needs to express your care, but, as with Sean's imprisonment, your needs take aback seat to the kids' needs.

I don't know how women might receive this plea, because I'm a man. And I'm, according to prison shrinks, "highly psychopathic". But I'm not good at wrapping such an important concern/request in fancy lace + bows. If you care, help the f-ing kids!

Me, loved the card. Your taste is... complex, good. :) I can appreciate such things as I have no kids being cut with razors or living with yet another ex-con bum (not that all ex-cons are bums! :) ). Forgot to tell ya before, you have a really cool smile too - f-ing huge + lopsided!

Dr. Cavegirl up here has such a smile, with heavy teeth too. Some lame said "her teeth are too big", but I like 'em, told her not to let anyone hate on her grill (smile). And I do recall several times being attracted to women my friends found boring. So, yeah, who each of us finds beautiful is... unpredictable.

I've had ugly girls turned off by me + stunning ones turned on.

And, my question's been answered anyway. I changed the wording of my ad on writeaprisoner.com + the next day received an e-mail. Guess it wasn't my photo scaring off people. The new ad starts: "SLIGHTLY EVIL GENIUS SEEKS FRIENDS AND HENCHPEOPLE"... :) - Story time!

When I was around 6 or 7 years young, I got a candy-apple red wagon, brand new, for my b-day or something. I was so happy, showed it off around the 'hood in Duluth, Minnesota (kinda a big city, full of working class), with my bros. + sis' tagging along. Then, some bigger, ruthless kid came up, busted my nose, took my wagon, never to be seen again. More encounters with, what was to me SHOCKING violence (at the time), led to me learning that peacemongers fare poorly; I became more violent, if I thought it was necessary. As a teen, *I* protected my older bro, even though he was an inch or two + twenty or more pounds heavier than I was. He's free, a computer whiz, and I'm not.

In my case, the ability to shut off cognitive dissonance (caused by the idealistic religious tales I was taught were reality, or natural instincts to be peaceful - the latter is doubtful, as we humans have close-set eyes etc, like ALL predatory animals, allowing us to gauge the distance of prey + chase them down) I DID feel when I became violent was learned. Each future act of violence was easier, caused less dissonance, than the past. But is that true for everyone? If so, then, yes, psych help is appropriate for the sadistic maintenance worker noted in "Building a Better Prison Cell", post #109.

But what if they don't want the help, are so programmed for sadistry (e.g. from religious or political indoctrination) that they look at the help as evil, brainwashing? F.Y.I., that's how I view the program here, because experience (see posts #22, e.g.) has shown me its purpose is to degrade me, enslave me, not help me, empower me.

The maintenance worker - along with the upper-crust of the crud constituting the P.I.G. - is too staunchly indoctrinated in his sadistry, I believe, to consider that he might be wrong or need help. At that point, the only option I've found to be left is to coerce a person to respect me as a human being, "unleash the hounds". It has often worked, even if not wiping out the causative indoctrination, especially on cowards.

How can those being oppressed by a system (run, if not ENTIRELY composed of, by people deeply indoctrinated in sadistic + destructive ideologies) make the oppression stop, if not get the constituents of the system to realize their wrongs?

Violence, or the threat of violence, has been the historic method of adjusting the attitude of oppressive systems. Revolution, war, terrorism. Sad but true.

But sooner or later, all systems become oppressive.

Jehovah's Witnesses are content to wait for Jesus to come back + remove all evil, which should mean them too (the ones I studied with for FIVE years up here look at oppression as an effective means of pushing victims toward Jehovah as their last resort), + certainly me! As the great contemporary philosopher Lars Ulrich sang, ""Am I evil? Yes I am, I am man!" No human lacks all evil, is perfect, nor could be. EVIL helps us do good: survive, solve problems, fight off greater "evil". (More on this...)

My experience has been that pacifism towards the P.I.G. + other oppressors only leads to more oppression; they think, "Well, we already got away with... might as well..."

We could make oppression illegal, but it already is, e.g. Wisconsin Statute 302.08 Humane treatment and punishment, has long said

The wardens and the superintendents and all prison officials shall uniformly treat the inmates with KINDNESS. There shall be no corporal or other painful and unusual punishment inflicted upon inmates. (emphasis added)

But you'll never see WI courts acknowledge this law! Google it + see. International treaties, the 8th Amendment - the judges just ignore them, as I pointed out earlier.

Ever see Braveheart? It's one of my FAVORITE movies. Long live Mel Gibson's crazy butt! :) Hey, he's from Australia, right? :) (or, one of your smiles) :D, ha!

By the way, kiwis are my favorite fruit! :) Thought you should know. Really!

PINK granite - you bloody tease! If I ever bust out...

Take care. Still awaiting a bigger pic so I can draw ya. I'll do your kids too, if ya want. Just tell me if ya want anything special done. :)

* Taylor aka whoeveryouwantmetobe aka Azazel-Iblis* Talk about a society of minds! I guess you're the devil in mine?

Listen, you did not refute Sean's claim that you cut his son with razors etc. (see post #102 + #106,readers). Why you were allowed to retain their custody blows my mind. You did not dispute having married your 3rd ex-con, in for heroin + firearms violations. After 1st claiming Sean's a monster, on par with Hannibal Lecter, you now call him a "little girl" + say he's a "known snitch"! YOU are a known snitch, the worst kind, the lying kind. Under the "convict code", you should have killed Sean for abusing those kids, but you called the cops instead.

Who "caught" Sean trying to have sex with his stepdaughter? Why do the expert reports say all the kids' hymens were intact + there was no other scars or evidence of the daily brutality you charged happened? Why'd you try to frame Sean for downloading child porn + now that he's suing you for that slander, dodge service/receipt of his discovery requests, which I help write, along with the suit? :) (Sean has a prison T.V., not a "personal" one; I have neither).

Please release those kids from your custody into a loving, healthy home. Your abuse of them evokes anger from me. Please stop impersonating barely literate Black Panthers, a boring + wrong stereotype.

I urge you to get some help. Although, I doubt there is any that can change your warped mind. Why Sean mated with you in the first place... but, spilt milk... (That Crazy-Town comment was funny).

Are you sure YOU weren't the one who stole those Christmas bonus checks, etc.? Seems right up your alley. You've sent me no documents refuting Sean's specific accusations.

See how nice I was, Benj? :) Taylor, tell Mark Jordan to look up Mike Lewis, "Bones", of the Circ + I'll listen to what Bones has to say. But you, your words don't count.