Suzie

Suzie, I just got your Jpay today. And please let me start by saying I'm sorry because I know a lot of this is going to hurt you and that's something I really don't want to do. But I promise it is all the truth...

First you say you devoted eight years of your life trying to help me get my act together. Well, please tell me when that was. Was it when you wanted me to buy ex pills or when we was doing meth, coke or weed together???? And you say you are unaware of any other female that spent that much time and effort as you did on me. Well, all I can say to that is that I didn't know I was a charity case. Oh, and you say I was happy enough to toss you aside multiple times. Please tell me how can I do that when I was the one on the side for you????? And two, you never belonged to me anyways from what you told me a lot of times. Are was supposed to stay around after you had a threesome with my ex and my ex best friend? Or how about when you started writing another guy that's locked up with me sex letters. And you get mad at me when me and the guy get into a fight...... OH, and as for what you said about if I spent as much time trying to better myself as I did trying to con people then I could fix myself... Well, Suzie, I'll be the first one to tell everyone that I have done some f'ed up stuff in my life. I have never denied that. But I don't know if it's that you don't want to see it or what. But for the past five and a half years I have been trying to change. Because I didn't like who I have become... But I had to become that way after I left LA. Or I would have ended up getting hurt again... And I know you don't understand that. But you don't know what it's like to have to leave everything and everybody you care for in a blink of an eye. I do, I had to do it and it hurts like hell... But that's a different story I don't wish to tell. And I'm not trying to con anyone. I don't want money from anyone, I don't want a girlfriend even. All I want is some friends I can write and talk about anything with and draw for that will write me back and maybe send me some pictures. And I really wish I could get back in touch with one of my best friends, she would kill me right now because I can't remember her name right now, I always called her my lil freak, LOL. CORINA knows her, she kissed her at the strawberry festival the day we met :) :) :) but if you want to be friends we can be. But you have to understand I want to write people without you getting all messed up about it, if you can do that then cool, if not I don't know. And you have to get over me wanting to talk to CORINA, hell, you talk to her, why can't I??????????????????????????????????????? And who knows, maybe later on we might find a way to get back together but for now I just friends... But it's all up to you.

JOE