Daniel Gwynn Blog Update
Date: 4/12/16
Subject: "The Pain Of The Day"

I haven't felt like writing much these past few weeks, or maybe it has been a bit longer. I've been so angry, frustrated & disappointed these days that i was afraid to speak and say the wrong thing. We've all said things in the heat of the moment that we've regretted the next day. so instead of making that mistake, I've remained silent.
I'm still angry because my days are still filled with the non-sense of my conviction & incarceration. Everyday I wake up to the absurdity of how I got here, and the uncertainty of whether I'll survive this. In some respects, it's pretty much the same as out there, but with the exception of the right to choose. I have no choice in the dictation of the day, and I almost went to the "Hole" a couple of time because of it. I don't like being told what to do or accused of any wrong doing if I've done nothing wrong. I've been accused of being disrespectful to an officer when I've spoken my mind in defense of their accusations, and even when I've remained silent. I'm a grown man and not some child that needs handling or admonishing for some despotic misconception. I do tend to get a little "excited" or "passionate" in my knee-jerk my head own, but they still find fault in my conduct. I cant win no matter what i do.
Upon reflection, I don't think they were trying to needle me--not to say that they don't. But I've been feeling very unsettled lately when being questioned or dictated to by anyone. I think that the knowledge of knowing that I don't belong here has made me very sensitive to criticism. Time is just ticking away while i rot in here. It feels like no one cares that i am an innocent man unjustly facing a sentence of death. I could die from this incarceration, or by the malevolent hands of the State. I don't know what more I can do to get out of this mess. There's only so much I can leave up to God, because God helps those who help themselves. I know I shouldn't let the bad element get to me, but it does.