THE NORFOLK CHRONICLES
by Timothy J. Muise
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- ADOLPH COORS MAKES BID TO PRIVATIZE NORFOLKWORLD / SEES "BIG BUCKS"

As always here at Free Speech Central we do our best to bring you "Breaking News" and all "The news that is fit to print" (even "Fake News" from time to time) to keep you informed about this circus that is WallyWorld/NorfolkWorld. Well the latest scuttlebutt around the blocks is that Beer Mogul, Adolph Coors, has made a bid with our Governor - the young Nazi - Charlie Baker, to "privatize" the prison. Mr. Coors is rumoured to have offered "Check Em' In Charlie" a real deal to foot the cost of running the gulag; all he asks for in return is to be able to take over the lucrative "Home Brew" business that is currently run at the prison. Adolph Coors plans to team with Sunkist Oranges in working to produce a "brew" that mixes well with suboxone and K-2 synthetic marijuana. Deputy Tee-Bone was heard gasping at the thought of the elixir of the Gods being poured down the throat of every P-1 recycle victim, 8-2 PES casualty, and RB dirty pee-pee corpse. I guess the plan is to have Scary Sherry dress up as The Saint Pauli Girl while The Green ChickenHead dons a pair of lederhosen, and then convert the Probation Unit into an Octoberfest Style Beer Hall fully equipped with kegs of fermented fruit beverage and day old Bavarian pretzels. Mr. Coors is also in negotiations with executives at Pfizer Drugs. Inc. to have drive thru pharmacy kiosks surrounding the Inner Quad for easy suboxone distribution. You stroll by in your state bo-bo's, slap 5 books of Forever Stamps on the kiosk counter, and a badge brandishing labcoat wearing technition will hand over a quarter strip and a spoon full of Norfolk Treatment Plant water for quick and effective snorting. You can then float down to the Bavarian Beer Hall and grab a cold brewski and soft pretzel. Now that is rehabilitation! Where do we sign up? The sad truth is that Norfolk is done; stick a fork in her. The fat lady has sung, the sun has gone below the horizon, and this gulag's corpse has gasped its last gasp. The "salary thieves" have destroyed any hope for real rehabilitation. The "Idle Inmate Population", as the oxygen wasting suits like to call them, live only for the next 1/16 of a suboxone strip, or the tiny square of K-2, or a soda bottle full of fermented fruit. No more seeking to get a college degree, or starting your own small business or learning a viable trade. All that is left is madness and the creation of future murderers. The "above-the-law" staff at NorfolkWorld are absolutely creating crime. They are the real threat to public safety and the public just does not get exposed to the truth. We will all sing a song of lament for what once was and we all laugh when these jackbooted suits refer to NorfolkWorld as a "Community Prison". It is a graveyard full of Zombies who just don't know there dead yet. Raise a glass of fermented fruit to salute a quick and painless death. Abandon all hope yee who enter the dirty wall of the Norfolk gulag. Agitate, Disrupt, Resist! It is the only way!!!

More To Come...