Reply ID: 7m8b
March 9, 2017

Dear TranscriptLion,
I just wanted to take a moment to say thanks to you, and everyone else involved in this project, for taking time out of your day to upload all of the writings generated by me and others in my situation. Sadly, mine are far from the best or even ideal. But over time, I've learned the true meaning of the Serenity Prayer and, just as importantly, patience.

This blog and comments left by those who've uploaded my posts, as well as those who've read them, have helped me through a difficult time. I've even been found by two different people from my past, one of which was a very dear friend of mine that I lost contact with shortly after beginning my term. Perhaps most touching of all though is the fact that I was recently contacted by someone who wanted to apologize for their part in having falsely accused me. While this does nothing to open the bars that have wrongfully imprisoned me for more than 14 years, it has helped me sleep a little easier at night.

As far as my "beautiful words" are concerned, any time someone takes time out of their day to respond to something I wrote acts as a major self-esteem boost. But when someone says something as nice as what you've said, well, let's just say that it takes my self-esteem to whole new heights. It was greatly appreciated. Thank you.

In regards to "better situations," when I wrote this, it was in 2005. I was in Corcoran dealing with some of the most corrupt prison guards you can possibly imagine. They were routinely tearing up my outgoing and incoming mail. It was their way of retaliating against me for having stood up for those in my housing unit who were too mentally disabled to stand up for themselves. As a result of their mail interference, and a number of other things they did to me, I lost contact with just about everyone I ever knew.

To make matters worse, they intentionally destroyed the contact information for everyone I knew during a cell search, further isolating me. Complaining was futile, though I tried anyway. In the end, I was so depressed and despondent that I tried to end my life.

It was shortly afterwards that I wrote part of this blog post, putting it into a folder and forgetting about it until the other day when a pen pal started talking to me about depression. I dug it out to share with them, mainly to show them that i understood. Then I thought it might be a good idea to share it with the world via my blog. After reading your kind response, I was glad I did.

On a side note, there's no denying the fact that prisons are filled with some truly deplorable people. But they're also filled with plenty of decent people who made some mistakes—admittedly, some more often than others. At the end of the day, the vast majority of us will be getting out sooner or later. Most of us later than sooner.

Prisons aren't meant to be 5-star resorts, but making them Hell-on-Earth serves no purpose other than worsening whatever disorders that caused our downfall. If you treat someone like an animal long enough, it's only a matter of time before they start acting like an animal. This has been proven time and time again. And yet, somehow, we seem to ignore these studies and insist on treating our prisoners as if they're not worthy of basic human decency. This only helps to perpetuate the cycle.

But this doesn't mean this is how it has to be.

If you're reading this, then you can make a difference in more ways than you could possibly imagine. Simply extend your hand in friendship to someone who's incarcerated. It might seem like a trivial thing to you, but I assure you—in here, it's not. Your action has a ripple effect, touching the person you write and everyone that person deals with. Not just then and there, but later on in life too, when they return to society. Your act of friendship might not change the world, but it can start the ball rolling in the right direction.

It's difficult to say how, or more importantly, why such a seemingly small thing like this could have such a tremendous impact—but it does. I think it has something to do with the fact that it's so different to make a genuine friend in here. For reasons too many to count.

You can't allow others get to know the "real you" in here. In prison, kindness is viewed as a weakness, which means that people rarely—if ever—display acts of kindness towards their fellow inmates. If they do, then you can rest assured that it comes with a price. With pen pals, however, you're given a chance to be yourself. To react with friendship and kindness, to develop the skills you need to make it out in free society.

As opposed to being kept in a cage and treated like an animal until the day you're released to society foaming at the mouth and barking at the slightest movement.

Either way, if you're reading this, then you might want to think about extending your hand in friendship to someone while they're still serving their sentence. You'd be surprise. Not just by the impact you can make in their life, but how much of an impact they can make in yours.

Should this be something you're genuinely interested in but have reservations, then by all means—share them with me. I have no problem whatsoever with showing you how to extend friendship to someone in here without being taken advantage by an unscrupulous person. After all, while there are many genuinely decent people in here, there are just as many people in here who simply aren't ready to change. At least, not yet.

Shawn L. Perrot CDCR V-42461
MCSP Cell # C-13-229L
P.O. Box 409060
Ione, CA 95640