False Prophet Smile
4-13-12

Harsh whispers
Soft lips
Last night's dreams
Seeping away
as I eat cold cereal
Days bleed into months
years flake away
like dead skin.

====

Never Know
4-13-08
When I am finally dead
cut me open
look around inside
I am telling you
God left something important out.

====

Paper
7-18-13
Published in Down in the Dirt

Discarded over the years
So many paper-thin layers of my soul
becoming a stranger
to the stranger I was.

====

Misty, I Was Wrong
4-28-13

My son and daughter
played in the background
of the phone
as she said "Come back to me"
help me raise these babies we created.
I couldn't look past her transgressions
even though I broke her heart first.

====

Faith
1-16-13

Every tear
that slowly
drips down
my face
I imagine
its an
angel kissing
away my
pain.

====

Mirror Fragments
6-4-13

I was never comfortable
as a young man
age now wears me down
I hardly recognize myself
the wrinkles hide
the boy I never knew.

====

Karma
6-3-13

I often wonder
after I die
will I experience
all of the pain
I've caused others

====

Window Paste
6-4-13

I caught
and trained
a cricket
morse code
I hope he finds you shadow wife
I've been craving to say
I love you
to our daughters.

====

Thank You
3-30-15

My first steps were taken on
booze-stained carpets
My first words were uttered through
second-hand smoke

====

Mocking Bird
3-4-17

Breaking life into ghosts
I become as God
disappointed in my creations.

====

Shadows
3-4-13

I'm forced to find shadows
in a shadows of my mind

====

Purge
9-17-06

I vomit
my soul
at your feet
only to watch
you walk away.

====

Dead Beat
10-27-12

I walk through life
with the weight of my children's grief
upon my shoulders.

====

Acceptance
2-27-13

One day
I'll walk down the corridor of self
I will acknowledge
every man I used to be.

=====

??
10-28-12

I don't know
who I am
the shadow
or the man
casting the shadow

====

Abortion
7-15-06

We chose not to name you
know your sex
Drugged out death-giving children
It's too late to welcome you
hope to see you soon.

====

Senseless
11-17-12

I live in a world
made of braille
without fingers

====

Mirror Mirror
3-19-13

One day
As you stare at your reflection
and notice your faded beauty
that time has begun to ravish your mind
that smile you see belongs to me.

====

Free Ride
1-25-07

In the toxic wasteland
I've caught my soul
on the side of the road
with its thumb in the air
trying to catch a ride
out of this hell I've created.

====

Ravens and Crows
11-25-13

I am the shadow
of the flying bird
forever grounded
between two worlds.

====

Reminisce
10-27-12

Liquid fire
tumbles from the corners of my eyes
burning into tiny cold kisses
that slowly drip off my chin.

====

Not Enough
2-13-17

Every tear you have shed
suffocated me in sorrow
Your love allowed me
to swim towards the light
and saved me from my darkness.

====

Wet Trees
1-5-12

Sour sweat
Stale smoker's breath
Moonlight tans
Sunken cheeks
Sick and dying
Lost in a needle love affair.

====

Futile
8-21-12

Holding a disconnected phone
Waiting for you to call.

====

Madness

Thank you
I told the smiling lady
as she handed me
a stack of papers
curiosity crowded my mind
A few words into madness
love committed suicide
my wife no longer loves me
it's right here in black and white

====

Mother's Last Breath
6-21-14

As you slowly die
Selfishly you deny us
the decency of mutual forgiveness
As in life and in your death
I'll never feel good enough to be your son
So I'll be stuck
with a chest full of disgrace.

====

Coward's Dilemma
6-22-14

Find courage
to cry
when it's not raining.

====

No Thanks to N.A.
3-29-08

Kicked my drinking habit
Shooting drug fetish
Still addicted to her.
There's no three a day chip
for a broken heart.

====

Hope
10-1-13
Published in Down in the Dirt

I whispered
I love you
into the wind
Has it reached you yet?

====

Birth Rite
5-1-07

It was passed down to him
he passed it down to me.
I passed it down to him
who one day
will pass it down to his own son
a tiny drop of poison
that will slowly spread to everyone we love.

====

Come Back
7-4-12

Five agonizing years
my wife's disappearance haunted me
She left with our two daughters
came back with a son and three daughters.
I remember looking upon her son and daughter
trying to imagine the man she loved.

====

Half Truths
4-28-12

I am crazy with a dose of sanity
a born again pervert
Grown up boy in a perfect man's body
A dead beat daddy
who drinks his coffee
out of a #1 Dad coffee mug
I bought.

====

Abyss
4-14-12

There's an emptiness inside of me
I've tried to fill with
Love and drugs
Hate and sex
books and writing
They have made me feel more empty.

====

Abandonment
8-25-12

I hear my children laughing and playing in the silence
I taste their tears through my own tears
I dream of all the lost moments
I should have shared with them
As wrinkles spread across the flesh
I grow more ashamed of my past
this hell I suffer is self-imposed
my children have suffered because of me.

====

Old Lady, New Lies
9-4-13

She told me she was lonely
that's why she was with him.
I wish I could tell her
being loved by her
is about as much fun
as playing with a bag of dead kittens.

====

Labyrinth of Self
8-16-12

Somewhere
behind the veil of pain and confusion
I watch myself
stumbling around in blind terror
trying to find a way out.

====

Little Prince
8-2-13

Pregnant with death
all the suffering torments
the imaginings
and remembering
one day will end
sweet cold relief.

====

Lost and Found
8-22-12

She lies and I believe
collecting dust and despair
waiting for her to come back
and use me.
Only love I get
is when someone picks me up
to dust beneath me.

====

Time Stolen
12-10-14

They dig through the sands of time
finding little pretty shells
to put upon their shelves
to be forgotten.

====

Iterate
7-11-14

I remember saying
I love you
and watched those feeble words
take flight
only to crumble from the sky
like dead butterflies
before they reached you.

====

Fatigue
7-22-14

In vain
I claim to be a resurrection man
Every dead thing
I've said or done
stays that way.

====

I.O.U.
6-30-14

My silly putty heart
takes impressions
from those around me.