THE NORFOLK CHRONICLES
by Timothy J. Muise
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-MILK & COPPER WIRE MISSING IN PLYMOUTH COUNTY/ FLEECE SUSPECTED

It had been reported to Free Speech Central that Plymouth County House of Correction was missing several hundred gallons of milk used for diabetic meals as well as several hundred yards of copper wire being used to wire some security cells at the prison. Suspect list as he was doing some journeyman work down in the old Country of the Pilgrims. Now it was been further reported that ole Miles Standish is rolling in his grave after seeing how The Fleece turns a two hour job into a week long venture and the old Indian Chief King Phillio would like to come back from the dead to scalp The Fleece like the Fleece scalps the state each year with his hatred filled electrical follies. We have also learnedd that large spool of copper wire was sold for $400.00 in one dollar bills and that those bills somehow ended up in the hands of Chippendales Dancers who were working at The Plymouth Pride Plantation dance club. The Staties are dusting the bills for prints.

-HALLOWEEN WILL BE REAL SCARY THIS YEAR / CHICKENHEAD RETIRING

Free Speech Central had learned that out Illustrious Food Services Director, The Green ChickenHead, will be retiring on Halloween of 2017. Our information has it that he will dress up presented a plaque by the surviving members of The Village People. Many down in the mainline kitchen, known as "Rodent Central" for its two legged and four legged rats, wonder who will take over to serve out dated food, violated CMR menu regulations, and to eat the hot dogs with out chewing them? The Head will sing a rendition of "In The Navy" and "Y.M.C.A." with the Indian and Construction worker while balancing a Hala Mean on his squid Hat. The Keynote address at the event will be given by Nathan "Chrysler" LeBron who will circumcise The Head and feed him kosher figs with his feet. A good time to he had by all. We say good riddance to bad garbage.

-GUEST NAZI SPEAKS TO LGI / "NO GUESTS FOR YOU! TWO YEARS"

The good news is that Governor Michael S. Dukakis and his wife Kitty wanted to come in and meet with The lifers' Group here at WallyWorld to work toward some solutions in public safety shortcoming's. The bad news is that the powers-that-be are scared shitless and have stalled the efforts; they know The Warrior will expose them. It reminds me of the old Seinfeld "Soup Nazi " episode: Tommy T. wants us to stand in the line, quiet, not making waves, and when we don't he screams- "No Gests for you! Two Years! " When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time! I see you Tommy T.!!!

More To Come...