March 23, 2019

Everything Good Or Bad Starts With Spark....

by Sarah Luedecke (author's profile)


It's crazy how everything good or bad starts with a spark, yet in some places the sparks lead to great fire which can destroy the entire world.

With me, my spark is driven by the everyday emotions of my everyday living routines. And yet, this time, it seems it has sparked a flame that refuses to go out in any type of great way. The fire only seems to grow hotter and hotter until the whole forest of my past is alight with it, and I can no longer remember who that person is or was because I am not any longer even a fragmented piece of that person. I can't make sense of why God allows and does the things that he does, but I have never been more grateful to the tragedies of my lifeā€”or the losses I should say.

I have never known in my whole the love without a single ounce of some type of chaos, yet here I sit and now know it. But will I speak or comment on the details? Not a chance. I hold these things closer still to my very soul. I am protective, fiercely so, of them and hope like hell for once they are in fact mine to hold onto and care for.

I have proven in this regard that I am quite capable of caring for them. Now it has to be for the sake of these things that I do what I do. I am so affected by my past and those monsters who have been a part of it, yet they don't as in any real way bother me where they are the cause of base and tormenting bad dreams anymore.

"Will you go to hell for me...?" I asked her. Without hesitation, she asked me and did not even falter in this response.

"In every way, without question... for YOU would I go!"

Madness, I thought to myself. And yet how could it be madness when in fact it would have been my own response had she asked me.

Her long black hair fell elegantly around her face. She, unlike any of the ones before her time, was much younger. Yet she carried herself as a member of the household she was a part of. She was simply my princess in more than just her own station she was born into...


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