January 7, 2013

Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. AL 1.40

Greetings, one and all;

First I must say that I am humbly appreciative of the chance to at last share what I feel, and have experienced in my (46) years of life, (27) yrs of which have been spent behind prison walls.

Before I begin the unfolding book of yesterday's revelations, I'd like to share some very positive and quite overwhelming moments which I experienced in the closing days of 2012.

On December 25, 2012 due to the recent introduction of "purchasing our own phone minutes" here at the prison facility I am currently housed at - I was able to purchase (45) minutes of phone time, which costed me something like ($15.00).

On the 25th I called my mother around 10am. And then later that night I called my middle sister Angela whom I hadn't spoke to in person since *1998*, WOW! Awesome it was to speak with her in person instead of a voiceless and faceless letter, oh, but another surprise awaited me as sis said she had someone who wanted to speak with me - wow! Ashley! My niece whom I had not spoken in person with since (2002). So it's safe to say that December 25, 2012 was quite a day for me.

Ah, then comes December 31st, 2012, the last day of another year quickly passed.

At mail call I received a letter from my daughter :); and in it she had given me (2) #s, which I could call in order to hopefully call her. I was one nervous and anxious individual, I must admit; I hadn't spoken verbally with her since 2002; and over the years through our letter exchanges we'd bumped our heads several times. I am quite emotional and temperamental when it comes to family and friends - and my daughter surely exhibits some of my traits. :)

My first try at calling her was met with an answering service, on which I hung up on. Nervous and even more anxious, I waited; then like (30) or so minutes later I try once again and this time she picked up on the second ring - I was so nervous I didn't know what to say at first except Hey and I love you! The sound of her voice immediately invited tears of joy to these tired eyes, let me tell you! She seemed as nervous and excited as myself, and trying to battle tears as well - my precious and beautiful baby girl - awesome! I am so proud of her and am so thankful to have been able to talk with her live - she made my whole year complete with (15) minutes of conversation. I was also blessed to hear and speak with Siara - my oldest granddaughter by my baby girl. Awesome!

Then on January 1st, 2013 I was able to talk with one who made all the previous events possible. My best friend and soul mate - Lauren. I expressed my appreciation for her nearly (7) yrs of devotion and help in every way.

I recently did a stretch of (7) yrs in solitary confine and (3 1/2) years of that was on supermax - a place in which I wasn't allowed to go outside for the entire (3 1/2) years! Quite a rough road, no doubt; however, there are other prisoners and convicts who've had to endure the same; even worse and more than my own personal experience. I am fortunate to have had family and friends on the outside to help me through my ordeal; so guys and women aren't so fortunate, and to those brave and honourable souls my heart and thoughts go out to - much love, peace and respect I freely give!

More I shall share in future updates and responses to any comments which might be presented.

In parting I offer something to ponder over - "That which constitutes man is not the earthly shell, but that Divine light which dwells within the core of every living soul upon this planet."

Thanks for allowing me to share and for your time in reading this - may your every step be met with warm and friendly smiles.

Love is the law, love under will.

Paul E. Bauguess

[drawing of a scarab beetle holding an amulet]