Rhonda Lindial
1401 State School
Gatesville, TX 76599
1584651
July 1, 2011
To prove that even though there is no self-defense law in the state of Texas, that I acted in a state of self-preservation, that there was a direct threat to my well-being, and that my actions were reflective and not planned—there is no easy distinction between a right death and a wrong one. Death was death. Only the circumstances and intent make it different. I realize that I'm not qualified to judge. Not then and not now.
But no one else was there—no one else there to help me, make him stop strangling me. I had to fight back or die. I grabbed the closest thing, I hit him seven inches above his right nipple. I could have aimed for his throat, heart, kidney, but I didn't. I just wanted him to let go due to the fact that he had 1.1 saturation of ethanol and 120 mm of amphetmine in his system. Stated on the autopsy report that he bled to death in ten minutes. I was connected to 911 from my cellphone while all of this was happening. I ran screaming into the street on Christmas Day 2008 for someone to call 911. I did not have on a shirt. I went to the neighbor's door for her to call 911.
I have been incarcerated since Dec. 25th, 2008. I run my hand over my heart, feeling my scars and the scar left by others.
Who am I? Am I a result of what I decide or what's been done to me? There's this little voice inside my head that screams no, you will not take the best of me. If I lost what makes me who and what I am, the things that define me and keep me whole, what would be left? Just a mass of bodily processes and emptiness. Yes, I can place my hands upon my scars, feel and see what is there and what scars have been left there by others. It does not define who I am. I decide, no one else. But the fact of the matter is that there is simply a part of me that refuses. The survivor in me, the piece of me that is my core that refuses to be a victim of life.
I am not half the woman you may think I should be because of what has been done to me. I am twice what anyone else is because I survived.
Memento homo, quia pulvis es, et in dulverem reverteris... Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return...
2018 may 5
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2017 nov 12
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2015 jan 26
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2015 jan 5
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2014 oct 4
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2013 feb 20
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Replies (3)
In situations such as yours, my ire rises all the more, knowing that justice was not served but that crime was permitted to continue under the mask of justice. Society no doubt needs to be educated and made aware of the truth of the (in)justice system. Sadly, most often it is 'just fine' to most people, until they are faced with dealing with the reality of it themselves.
It is my hope that your story and others like it will come to be known by the general public, realized for what they truly are. To realize the implications, meaning and affect of such (in)justices. Without doubt you have been served a great injustice and others in similar situations. The 'world' needs to see and realize such...
Respect ~ Kevin
I have questions and I have a desire to further understand what you want to achieve with your experience.
I would like confirmation from you that you still actively come to this place , if not here, where and if nowhere ,why not? I will then ask questions and perhaps share my thoughts with you and my experience of an abusive relationship!