Nov. 28, 2013

A Brief History Of Shirleyworld-The Madness Journals

by Timothy J. Muise (author's profile)


Chapter XXVI

We had our second annual "Toys For Tots" Walk-A-Thon here at the prison and as the event coordinator, I must say that it was a great success even against great opposition. That's right: there is OPPOSITION to the Toys For Tots Walk here and you know where it comes from: The SCUM in the guard's union. You Sgt. Bitch (a real mental defective) and Coach Woodhead (that's right, they still waste your money on "Recreation Officers" in this system - real super do nothings) are such self-loathing, hatred filled vacant souls that they tried to stop the service team from setting up and worked to have the event stopped an hour early. I am so happy to report that we - the motivated prisoners involved with the effort - thwarted them at every turn. You should have seen the look of hatred on their faces when we prevailed against them. Now Deacon Artful Dodger has to be given some credit as he actually listened to the prisoners that day. Getting him to seek resolution from higher powers is like trying to get a house cat to take a bath, but on this day The Artful Dodger got it right. He called Captain Sherbert and Captain Cowardly and they put Sgt. Bitch and Coach Woodhead (his head is made of wood, it seems, as he ain't too bright. He also used to be a guard but he could not take the heat so he got out of the kitchen and it has left him with a bad taste in his mouth. On this day that taste was "ass" as that is what we handed him!) in check as both of these $100,000.00 per year captains fear their boss The Boot. The Boot knows the walk-a-thon is good PR, but trust me when I tell this event was planned, run, facilitated and completed by PRISONERS! The suits and screws had no part in it. We are approaching $750.00 raised. Wonder what the guards union donated? Oh ya, it was the big goose egg = ZERO!

They have a lifers block here at the prison. I call it the morgue as it is just full of men waiting to die. There was a great incident in that block this past week which brought a smile to my face. There are two TVs in that block - large screen/flat screen LGs - that we pay for with the portion of our phone fees and canteen purchases that goes into the "inmate benefit account" (which the DOC regularly steals from). These are OUR TVs and they are for our use. The cops that work on the Morgue block put the TVs on after the men there lock in for the night - like they are their own personal TVs - and they treat them like crap. The cons see this and shut them off, but after the doors are locked and there is not much you can do - we are locked in cages like animals and the cops have full access to OUR TVs. The night of the first game of the World Series a prisoner unplugged, switched off, and took the batteries out of the remote of the TVs. The cops were furious. After count a few more cops from other blocks left their posts (a very regular occurrence) to go to the Morgue Block and watch the game, but when they got there the layabouts that work in the morgue could not get them on. They opened one of the prisoner workers' doors and asked him to turn them on: he refused - God Bless Him! They were super pissed (the layabouts) to the point where one oxygen waster, CO No-Mind, wrote this prisoner who refused to turn them on a D-Report! He charged him with "refusing a direct order" - unbelievable, but the good news is the next day when Captain Cowardly saw the D-Report (which he must endorse) he knew that this ticket could come back to haunt him in the form of an investigation into why the cops are watching the cons' TVs at night when they are supposed to be watching the gulag. This cop - CO No-Mind, is none too bright - he basically told on himself, but by job description a guard is a rat - a freakin' cheese eatin' rodent - and this one even tells on himself.

The latest issue of Mass Prison Voice is out and boy, is it causing a stir here at ShirleyWorld and I could not be happier! I am so proud that a couple of my humble articles are included and they spotlight Deputy Denied-Oh, Capt. Cowardly, Lt. Whirlwind (who I will have "Breaking News" about later) and the clowns that are these guards. My dearest friends also have pieces in the issue and the hard fighting cons of ShirleyWorld are super represented. You should see the looks on the faces of these human rats as I walk by. They whisper about the articles but say nothing to me. They don't know that I have been doing this for years and it makes my time easier. Sgt. Messy-Her made copies of the newsletter and circulated to guards around the camp with the message: "These guys get nothing!" What a fool he is: I would NEVER want anything from him. I would not want to interrupt his ID patrol, scarf stakeout or blue shirt checkpoints. I will use my Free Speech rights and put their shit on the street each and every week. These guards are dirty and they are creating crime. I HATE their prison - and there is NO good prison - and they cannot intimidate me with threats of "transfer" or "the hole" as I could do the rest of my time (about four years) in the box. I could use the prayer and writing time. To get your subscription to the Mass Prison Voice and find out what all the buzz is about, please write to;

Mass Prison Voice
P.O. Box 441825
Somerville, MA

$4.00 to $10.00 (Sliding Scale) for non prisoners [4 Issues]
FREE to prisoners!

BREAKING NEWS!!! Lt. Whirlwind is now known as Lt. Urine!! The men of ShirleyWorld almost without exception call her Lt. Urine and as a representative of the prisoner population I must listen to their wishes. So from here on in Lt. Whirlwind will be known as Lt. Urine: and I must say the name is quite fitting as she has an acidic personality, a cowardly yellow streak, and her attitude stinks. She shares so many characteristics with piss that I must say I should have thought of this moniker sooner, but the fact remains that the masses here at ShirleyWorld have spoken and Lt. Whirlwind will from here on in be known as Lt. Urine! It was so funny as one con called her Lt. Urine to her face and she said, "Did you just call me Lt. Urine?" He said, "No". But you could tell from the look on her hateful mug that she knew he said urine. At that point she was not aware that the whole camp - the whole asylum - calls her Lt. Urine. She knows now and it could not fit her better! (-;

Our new organization "Bread & Water" is taking shape. Our platform will focus on holding the DOC accountable for their failure to adhere to the rehabilitative mandate for G.L. c. 124, 1(e) while specifically focusing on the need for compassionate release legislation, commutation reform, parole reform, proper medical care, and being the true voice of the prisoner here in the commonwealth. Our outside board should be filing articles of organization with the Secretary of State in the very near future and we will work to become a 501(c)(3) non-profit corporation. We plan acts of civil disobedience in the free world and will be a presence at the state house: both inside and out. The movement is building and we are ready to make some real changes. We must work to reallocate all the wasted money spent on guard salaries - the "overstaffing" problem - and redirect it to efforts of real rehabilitation and true public safety. Viva La Revolucione! Viva Bread & Water!!

These oxygen wasters had another "Wellness" day here. For their "Wellness" they ate popcorn, fatty hot dogs and pastries made by cons. The problem is that when they have these "Wellness" events they lock us all in our cages. They take away from our regular law library, school, programming, Church and recreational activities to do more laying about. I am going to contact the commissioner and see if they had the authorization to lock us in early and I will also file a grievance. I'll keep you posted but rest assured I care little about the "Wellness" of these abusers. I will fight for the WELLNESS of the motivated prisoner!

More To Come...







Replies (1) Replies feed

Paul Posted 6 years, 10 months ago. ✓ Mailed 6 years, 9 months ago   Favorite
Best of luck with 'Bread & Water'. What Einstein thought that one up? Let me guess!

Civil disobedience the Occupy Prisons debacle. I suppose it is feasible to have a presence inside and outside the State House but won't they miss each other?

No matter how much you hate.......come the night the doors are locked and you are incapable of anything but raging against the world.

I wonder how long after release your recidivism theory and your institutionalization will invoke your inevitable return to 'Shirleyworld' A year would be a result. I just pray that it won't involve the murder of another innocent.


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