June 13, 2019

Realizing a fear

by Douglas Blaine Matthews (author's profile)



Dear Reader,
Hey, I hope you're doing well!

Alright, today's story is about me realizing a fear for the first time and my reasons for it. Let's hope I can convey the humor in it! :)

I can't remember the year, but it was after 2003 and before 200...?

Some friends and I came down to Florida for some fun. It was the first trip I'd taken with these two, so I didn't know how it was going to go. One of them (we'll call him Spider) couldn't contain himself when he drank. He tried to fight everyone—until he tried to fight me. I didn't want to hit him because he was drunk. But he kept pushing and pushing (verbally). Then the S.O.B. kicked me in the chest!

What! Yup! He got his foot up to my chest, and I didn't see it coming. So... yeah—I punched him. Knocked him out and he stayed in bed till the next afternoon.

He didn't remember any of it. And when we recounted the night to him, his response was, "Yeah, I deserved that! Ha ha!"

The other guy was a party animal, but he knew his limit.

Anyways, on our first day on the beach, we kicked around the sand and made a bet. Last one out to the breaker and back spends all day (dinner and drinks). All agreed, and we took off racing for the water.

We splashed in and were off to the races! I'm swimming hard. I've always been a good swimmer, but I didn't know how well they swam. So, I held nothing back. I hit the breaker first and looked back. I was well in the lead, but Spider was gaining quick.

Then I had a thought. I'm waaaay out in the water. I can barely see the beach. So, it must be really deep right here. I bet a hige fish could swim underneath my feet, and I wouldn't even know it.

More importantly—a huge shark!

One big enough to bite my torso and chop me clean in half with its machine-like jaws. With rows of razor sharp teeth! Fear jumped in, adrenaline flooded my body, and I snapped to!


And off I went like I had a twin turbo motor in my legs! I didn't look back, and my arms and legs churned until my hands scooped up sand!

Back on non-shark infested territory. Shoo—!

My arms felt like bags of sand hanging off my shoulders, and my best burned as I sucked in much needed oxygen. I looked out into the water. Spider and Chevy (not his real name) are waaay out there. They must have taken a break at the buoy.

A few minutes later, when they—well, Spider—made it in, he said, "That wasn't fair, dude. You never told us you swam like that! But it's all good 'cause I ain't last! Ha!"
I said, "Sharks..."
He said, "What! There's sharks out there now!?"
"I don't know. But when the thought hit me and I realized how big one of them could have been lickin' its chops on my legs, y'all ain't stand a chance in hell! Haha!"

Chevy lost. We all ate lobster! :P

I eventually reasoned with my fear of that kind of vulnerability, but that first thought was a doosy! Ha!

Until next time!

Yours truly,


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