May 16, 2017

What is Friendship?

From L.A.O.S. (Live As One Strong) by Souvannaseng Boriboune (author's profile)


What Is Friendship?

I sit here in the depths of my consciousness trying to understand "friend" or "friendship" and the responsibilities such labels might carry. Often I ponder the meaning of these words. It seems such an obvious thing, "friendship", and yet it becomes so very complicated. So here I am navigating through the ocean of understanding and hopefully I don't crash on an island of vagueness.

We all have people in our lives hat we call friends, but how many of us can really say that we know our friends? Maybe with the tongue only, but internally, I don't know.

We think we understand those around us. The people we have come to know reveal patterns of behavior and as our expectations of that behavior are fulfilled time and again, we begin to believe that we know the person's heart and soul. I consider that to be an arrogant perception, for one cannot truly understand the heart and soul of another. But this is where the beauty arises in a friendship. As crazy as this may sound, it leads us to the word we call "trust." Even though we do not know their heart and soul, we trust them with ours and they trust us with theirs. With this trust, we are giving someone the ability to destroy us, but hoping they don't. That is why trust is so important in the realms of friendship. So if you are willing to give someone this trust and the ability of knowing the consequences that can manifest from it, then you can truly say that person is your friend. Hope becomes your pillow of faith, so you rest without worries.

Indeed, trust is a key component. But respect is a fundamental part in friendship. Respect is allowing your friends to be their own individuals and allowing the me to have their own conscious. See, by allowing them to be their own person, their own mind, views and thinking, you develop a fond respect for their uniqueness because it lies within their very own individuality. If you cannot respect their individuality, then you are not a friend but an enemy to their personality.

We also must understand that there is a fine line in friendship and, when that line is crossed, the result is often disastrous. Sometimes, the friends become more like a parent and, when that happens, your friendship is reduced to a totalitarian one. Freedom is ignored because parents are the dictator in a child's life. And if you treat your friends like a child, they will no longer respect you nor trust you with their thoughts, opinions, and views because they are fearful of your judgments of them. Don't be a parent to your friends, be a friend that they can trust and turn to, not turn away. There is no respect for judgmental people. You can warn without jumping and uplift without belittling.

With this said, I came to the conclusion that those I call friends are ones I trust with the ability that they have, and with the hope that I truly know that their heart and soul are genuine. And I know that they respect my views, mind, thoughts, and opinions, and they allow me to be my own individual without questioning it. This is the essence of friendship, trust and respect, which turns the friendship to genuine and unbiased love.

I hope that I shed some light on friendship and helped you navigate through the ocean of understanding. These are my views and they are subjective, but I hope you respect it. I can be mistaken, but we are creatures of flaws and sometimes things can be hypocritical, but life is hypocritical. Your views from last year could be different today and tomorrow. But knowledge helps you navigate through those storms and when the storm clears. The knowledge I acquire through life shaped my views on friendship. So I rest my head on this pillow of faith with no worries or cares 'cause I trust and respect my friends.



Replies (1) Replies feed

Jaewrites Posted 5 years, 1 month ago. ✓ Mailed 5 years ago   Favorite
I agree with you on the basis of a friendship. Trust and respect are important in any kind of relationship. If you don't trust your friends, family, co-workers, boss, then you don't have respect for them. If I don't trust someone to be honest with me, I usually just avoid getting in too deep with them.

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