Dec. 12, 2019

Put On Some Armor

by Kelly Jones (author's profile)


Photo of the author dated 10 13 2019. He is dressed in a loose sweater and has a goofy smile on his face.

"Put on some armor. Just remember what's armor and what's you, so when it's time to take it off, you can."
—Brent walks, The Blinding Knife

Tues. 11-05-19
1:42 PM

Dear Readers,
Howdy! I hope everyone is having a great Fall!

We're currently in our cells (unlocked, so far) after they were late calling the afternoon work call. That's when I go into the library for the afternoon shift, which is supposed to be at 12:40 PM. If they call it at 2 PM, I'll have to rush off.

Anyway, it appears that something is going on—possible someone "fell out" again.

They were supposed to have a memorial service in the chapel for Evan AKA Farmer who committed suicide in the SHU recently. I was seeing him last New Years. It's a shock to hear that he killed himself. He was very handsome and charming. Only had a short time to go. We had talked before he went to the SHU at the library a couple times, and I would've liked to have seen him again. I hope he finds peace.

The Samhain (Halloween) service was pretty cool. I was planning on working out all that day, but a good client talked me into coming in from 7:40 AM to 9 AM. At 10 AM we had a meditation in the chapel—or you had the choice of watching informational video. I did the meditation.

After that we had our ritual meal for the year. We had pork, fried chicken, French onion soup, fried bread, mashed potatoes, peach cobbler, and maybe a couple of other veggies that I ignored. I was stuffed after we ate—they let us get two trays.


Wed. 11-06-19
7:54 PM

According to, there was a fight on the rec yard and six guys went to the hole, so we're locked in our cells today.

"Cruel Summer' by Bananarama has just ended, and I fast-forward to "Live Your Life" by Pee Wee on C3PO.

Back to Samhain.

We went to the chapel and early dinner that evening and then back to the outdoor ritual that night. I actually talked Nathan into going and he hung out with Junior, whom I'm trying to hook him up with.

Sister April, our outside volunteer, drove in and we had a real nice ritual with a lot of good energy. They had a separate attached circle to the Shadow Realm, and I went in. I spoke to both my parents, but it felt like my dad appeared. We got to have our late count at the chapel like last year, so we can came back late again. That's always different.

I was looking at what remained of my notes about previous posts. Previous notes were lost. I could have sworn I wrote about this, but it could have been in the letters which were lost.

Anyway, a couple months ago, a new guy here came up to me and it turns out that I used to hang out with his mom and aunt when I was in high school! I've been to his grandmother's place several times. My male cousin was also a part of that group and he mainly brought up Nathan (now Alex) as a father figure. So, I called Alex 'cuy. HE looks like his mom's side of the family.

I was born in Corpus Christi, Texas, and that will always be my home. But just before my tenth birthday, we moved to Marionville, Missouri when my dad retired from his job as a welder at the naval base in Corpus Christi.

Marionville, at that time, had just over 1,200 people in it. It's grown a little since then. It's the home of the white squirrels. I'm sure you can google white squirrels Marionville, Misouri and read about it.

So, Nathan/Alex's mom lived in Billings, the next town over. We may have started hanging out when I was a sophomore, but for sure when I was a junior and senior in high school. We hung out every Saturday night with a big group at Goof Off and go to amusement parks and concerts and plays and such, both locally and further away in Kansas City and St. Louis.

I was closer friends with his aunt Lynne who visited me when I lived in Austin, Texas and during a brief layover in Houston, Texas.


Fri. 11/15/19
12:49 PM

Hello... Currently I'm locked in Club 16—blessedly alone—as it appears something may have happened. They made an announcement earlier that education would be closed, but this current early lockdown doesn't seem to be connected to that.

I'm sitting here at the desk drinking coffee with cinnamon which was smuggled from the kitchen, listening to Prince singing "Controversy" on C3PO.

I'm alone 'cause my cellie Nathan moved out this past Tuesday into another cell. He was really a filthy person. He rarely washed his clothes. I never once saw him change his sheets and he rarely showered. Ugh. I could end up getting someone worse, but I don't miss him.

He may have moved out 'cause I had an... uh... incident this past Friday—a week ago. To be precise, I fell out on K2 (Deuce) and apparently kinda attacked him. Once again I hit my fucking head and bled everywhere. After the CO's came and marched me away, I was taken to medical and hen the Lt.'s office. Luckily I was released back to the unit after that.

This is the fourth fucking time I've fallen out since May. This shit is getting ridiculous.

Yeah, I haven't exactly been forthright lately, and I thought I should come clean.

This past May(?) when I went to the SHU? I fell the fuck out. It was scandalous. They had to carry me down the stairs with cuffs on my wrists and ankles as I was screaming out of my mind. And this past August? When I went to the SHU again? Yep, then too. Hit my head and there was blood everywhere.

There was actually another time too between these two when I fell out, but it was handled without the po-po getting involved, so I was lucky.

This this past Friday I've been a total train wreck lately. I still get to work and do my job fine (when I'm not in the hole), but I seriously need to straighten out. I can't keep doing this. I've become a joke and it's my own fault.


Wed. 11/20/19
9:46 PM

"Nutbush City Limits" just came on C3PO and Tina Turner belts out as I sit at my desk in a cell by myself still (so far).

And oh my fucking God do I have news! The prison here has the actual accreditation people here visiting and guess who sent them a letter prior to their visit and guess who met with them tonight—by their request! Now there was a major problem 'cause when the CO unlocked my cell just after count and told me to go to the Lt.'s office, I never thought it would be them and didn't have any of my emails that I'd printed out with me. So, the guys said that he'd meet with me tomorrow.

Crazy, huh? I sent them a three page letter, and I'm gonna let this place have it!

I was charged #2 by medical for this past time that I fell out. I mailed them that they aren't allowed to charge me for what they called an emergency visit. They still refused to refund my $2. I printed out this email and will be bringing it with me.

Stay tuned...


Sat. 11-23-19
4:39 PM

"Love's Been A Little Hard on Me" by Juice Newton ends on C3PO and "Shout" by Sheena Easton comes on, on this rainy afternoon. I sit blessedly still alone with Charlie the Giraffe laying in the window with his ass in the air.

It was the theme for the weekend. I've been a mess as usual. But alone in that respect too, unfortunately.

Okay, so the meeting with the ACA guy went fairly well. I wish he'd quit telling me what they would or wouldn't do and let me add on a few things I forgot about. I did bring the email from the health department (medical) about their charging me when they aren't supposed to, and he made a copy of it.

Fuck these people. They certainly fuck with us.

Oh, I mentioned that it was rainy, and I want you to know that I got my wall drainage system put up yesterday after the inspection crap. Thank Goddess I took care of that!

I haven't mentioned that they've put up some metal detector crap on rec—mainly 'cause I've been a total sissy and a house mouse and refuse to go out in the cold—so I haven't experienced it yet. I heard it was a total fuck up.


Thurs. 11/28/19
9:03 AM

It is a total fuck up.

But anyway, Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I am certainly grateful for all of my readers and always enjoy hearing from you. If you ever have any comments or questions, please feel free.

So far I'm still alone! Yeah! It's a sleepy morning as I sit here at the desk. "Cherish" by Madonna has just ended and "Wanted" by Hunter Hayes comes on C3PO.

I get to sleep in—which for me is only 8-8:30 AM, but it's so rare that I get to do that. I was busier than shit at the library the past couple of days—I went in both nights to work on staff.

We'll have our big lunch in a few hours and get a boxed meal for dinner as we usually do on holidays. I'll probably have the slight chill and go out to the rec yard, which I haven't done much. My public needs me, and I've got to get some flirting on. It's been slow lately. Most of the hot little drug hustlers have left, and they haven't been replaced. It sucks!

There was one cute little psycho-Christian boy who was going wild for Deuce recently, but he ended up going to the hole and "found Jesus" all over again before I could get together with him, damn it.

Oh, so I made it out to rec three (?) nights ago and was planning on leaving at 7 PM. But then some huge drama happened and they had us standing outside lining the fence. To leave we not only had to go through the metal detector, but they had about seven-eight CO's putting us down after that. It was a real pain in the butt, and I never saw any reason for it.

Anyway, I hope everyone has a great holiday and until next time. Oh! I almost forgot! I got a picture taken last month which I'm including, so you can see what I currently look like. I sure wish I could go back to being young and cute!

Love and blessings,


Replies (3) Replies feed

Rita Posted 3 months, 3 weeks ago. ✓ Mailed 3 months, 1 week ago   Favorite
hey hey hey Kelly, Sometimes I couldn't read too well your writing.You used to write neater,you know.Indeed I haven't been here for a while.
You fell out... How do I understand this better?Do you take drugs or so?I should read other notes to see what happened with your friend? It seems hard to maintain a friendship in a prison?
Anyway,I guess you can explain me better in a letter,eh.Still doing your writing job?I saw your new picture; did you loose a little weight?Or were you always that thin perhaps? Let me talk about my side of the world.Did you get the letter I sent you from my hotel in America not too long ago?I had a pleasant staying there!And brought 14 visits of 6 hours every time!Till now I STILL haven't received any news about the Paroling!Why taking so much time to do so!??It's waiting for ever,so it seems. :(If only the news will be positive.WE hope.T taught George French.He thinks it's a romantic language and he loves to study it.I gave French lessons while visiting.With writing with crayons on white paper;this is meant to draw for children when visiting somebody.We had plain fun! We had lots of talks about music!He' s such a musical mind.He lately typed a LOT of songs for me!When they would release him- he has a very good chance this time!- I'll travel for a 'short' 3 months to Chicago.He will need help!:o Later AGAIN about 3 months more. That is the maximum time I can stay in the US.Like a small 6 months per year that is.My ex, will buy an apartment where I live,to avoid the high taxes they raise in Argentina!He can avoid these by living MORE than 6 months is BE.Well, he can live in my apartment,while I cross the Atlantic ocean.That would be the very same period of time.:)I swim in cold water in the pond here in the park nearby.I am thus a so called 'polar bear'.It's fantastic,I love it!I care on some Saturdays for a child,just 3yrs, Alice with my healthcare organization.She is retarded.And has a piece too much on chromosome 15!She can't walk,nor speak.Also has autistic traits.But by now she fixes me and made a lot of improvement!
She's a real darling!Her mom is sick most of the time.I take on me the role of a mom right now.:)This coming Saturday I will take a Dance Theater workshop.Georgina had an injury,and we get a man,22 who won a few choreography prizes!Wonder...
Kelly,take care,I care!Keep up the good spirit!A saying for you:'Out of the dark a light broke through and it illuminated my path'.- Khalil Gibran.Know him?

Kelly Jones Posted 2 months, 2 weeks ago.   Favorite
(scanned reply – view as blog post)

Rita Posted 1 month, 2 weeks ago. ✓ Mailed 3 weeks, 2 days ago   Favorite
hi Kelly,

I never knew you smoked drugs?When you know the consequences!...You used to type writing a lot and kept so busy, so why doing it?Isn't doing yoga not a lot lot better, Kelly? Relationships,it might be difficult in a prison,I presume? But in there are people you can depend on, I guess? I hope you find such a friend.You must be out of the hole by now? Was it a month? How crazy this is!It is late here. We had a fierce wind lately! and it's starting all over again! :(We are not used to have them!
Lately I started a new course:in 4 sessions. One more Friday follows.Diary scetches.Drawing. We did some blind drawing.I'll explain:you draw the face from another person,but not looking at the paper,only to the face of that person.One has a type of Picasso's drawing.Goele,our young teacher showed a lot of original and interesting ways of making art!Now she tells us to find sentences you hear,or pictures or words that kept your attention,so,I'm curious what she plans to do with them? We wrote with our left hand,we wrote upside down,we wrote from the end of a word forwards,etc We had to find a text out of a magazine and only keeping the words beginning with the same particular letter,we chose.Making an odd poem in that way.Then also out of a text keeping the words you liked,and swiping the others.Words that touch you.In groups of 3 people,you read your words,and the 2 other people make drawings, blindly on paper.Intuitively,and you change turns reading and drawing.Then you get the drawings from your own story from both people.You put them with colored pens on a plastic sheet.You cut out the different shapes out of the plastic sheet.We then all(many participants)placed them later on several white sheets of paper.Then we placed the shapes on one page seeing the same colors.For example: all the greens together,etc.The bigger shapes together,the smaller ones,etc Connecting the lines,...We painted once on a large paper put over a broad table.Working with 2 people at the other side and exchanging places.A duo work. Then we all tore the paper in pieces.Making art with designs and paper pieces together.We had beautiful results! I will travel to America pretty soon.Visiting Leslie and her family and than George next.He isn't free,he came one vote short!:(( He has a new chance in October or November.Let us hope he finally is a free man!Kelly,I will write a letter with some other news.Keep safe,don't use drugs.You know better! A warm hug from Rita,who cares.:))

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