Jan. 5, 2012

Reality Check

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From Anarchist. TransFeminist. Amazon. by Jennifer Amelia Rose (author's profile)
uploaded Jan. 5, 2012.  Original (PDF)pdf
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Reality Check!

The guard grumbles at me
"Shirt off or no shower!"
Is he for real?
Expose my breasts to all the men?
Including haters and rapists?!
I protest balking, incredulous
I feel humiliated, violated
Flashbacks to past abuse
To parade around topless?
I refuse! I REFUSE!!!
Thus, I'm denied a shower and shave
Deprived of dignity and humanity
Reality check!
I'm a transexual
A woman in a man's body
In a men's prison
Where I'm hated and wronged
I don't belong here
Alone I struggle and cry
I suffer and hope to die
Yet, for my sisters, I stay strong
With hope, I carry on
To open their eyes to the lies
Reality check!

Jennifer Gann © 2011

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OnTimeInCheckCC Posted 12 years, 2 months ago. ✓ Mailed 12 years, 1 month ago     1 Favorite
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I cannot imagine what you face in such a place where you are right, you do not belong! Why transexual females stuck in a mans body (even though they change that body issue!) are still being always treated any different than "other females" is beyond my right mind and common sense/understanding- would they put a natural born female who came out right from the start AS A FEMALE from birth (!!) in a prison shower full of men and tell them to show their body off to make it even worse?? I want you to know this REALITY CHECK really spoke to me in so many ways, and I felt for you and at the same time I felt WITH you. There will always be those who want to bring us down and refuse to understand. Who knows how long people will have to fight to truly be themselves in this FREE world?? You are right about so many things, not only is a severe reality check much needed among those who choose to shut their eyes to who others truly are inside AND out, despite what THEY think they see and nothing beyond that?? One day maybe they shall finally open their eyes to all of the lies, as your beautiful words state so clearly. I know its easy to feel alone when you are struggling, its human and a natural emotion/feeling, because you feel you have no one there to comfort you when you need it the most. As you even said, you are in the midst of a world where you dont belong and where honestly I would be livid myself just as you were/are! However, please never stop fighting for the sisters out there that you so kindly mentioned, and know that no matter how alone it can get and how alone it can at times feel in there surrounded by males and uncaring individuals etc, know that your sisters are fighting for you BACK as well! I promise you that! Much Love CC

Jennifer Amelia Rose Posted 12 years ago.     1 Favorite
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OnTimeInCheckCC Posted 12 years ago. ✓ Mailed 12 years ago     1 Favorite
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Hi Jenn! Thank you for your responses to my comments! (smile) I also want to thank you for your kindness in your other comment when it comes to offering some advice my way. Luckily, things are starting to fall into place alot more by now, but the first few months were rough. I donate/support Just Detention Internation twice a year every year and am familiar with the PREA act from their website. I hate to hear its not being followed though, because I worry for your safety and think the right thing should be done so that you can continue to flourish as your true self inside and out without feeling you may be hurt or being uncomfortable. I send much support your way and will try to write if I can, Id love to, just know I am sending you best wishes each day and will happily join in any ruckus that needs to be made for the places not feeling the need to follow the PREA act for others safety!

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