6/12/2011
Missing Persons

There are certain people missing from my life today due to my choices. Some people are missing because life, at times, is funny that way. Others choose for themselves, for their own reasons to be missing persons in my life. Yet my heart aches for them like crazy.

I've got two older brothers whom, by all that is holy, mean the world to me. One I haven't seen since I was 17. Roger is the essence of good and beautiful. My lifelong dream is to one day be hugged by my brother again. Robert Nick, the exact opposite of my brother Roger, the essence of my life within his veins, hasn't spoken to me since 2003 or 2004. Man, a girl always needs her older brothers, even when she says she doesn't need anyone.

(Forgive my mistakes, this is not coming easy for me.)

I have two younger sisters I haven't seen since I was 15 and went on vacation to spend two weeks with them, Margret Jean and Amanda. Trying to locate my sisters has proved difficult since I only have the old address in Fr. Collins, Colorado. However, I refuse to lose hope. I'll find them one day.

My two older sisters, Selina and Gina, are beautiful, smart, and truthfully guarded. I last spoke to Gina the night my (our) mother passed away. Selina, I write to but I haven't the faintest clue whether she reads my mail or not. Maybe one day God will straighten it all out.

My Uncle Jerry and Aunt Cindy Lofrin are supposedly in the Midland/Odessa region. I'm sniffing at trails, trying to locate them. My family, so scattered.

This is probably why I long for family and a sense of belonging. The missing persons in my life all have left marks on my heart and soul. A void must be filled.

My second mom, Lori Crawford-Rounsavall, is who I wish I was seeing right at this very moment. She'd wipe the tears from my eyes. She'd hold me. She always made me feel safe and loved. Damn, I miss her.

If you have people you love missing from your life, I urge you to reach out to them. Try to make amends and heal your relationships. If you never try, then you'll never know.

❤+

====

6/28/11
Happy Birthday

Theyprecious - Just wanted you to know that you are very much thought about. I pray that you have a very wonderful and blessed birthday. I know your birthday is not until the 3rd, but I'm used to being early and not late. LOL

No, this shoutout isn't long. But it's the context that matters. I love you. Happy birthday, Precious!

❤ Nichole
:P