Hey Man, Zap has been my "moniker" as you call it since 1977. It is from when the arcades first came out and you could only use three letters in your high score name on games. And I've stuck with it ever since. Pretty funny shit I guess. I have had a great life as far as my kid's are concerned, other than not having a great education and having to do construction for 23 years. But the kids are alright as the Who would say. Denna graduated High School in 2009 and is now a piercing artist, but she is so artistic that she may do many thing's. Rick Jr. is in High School and a certified genius. So he loves school and always has and is doing great. He has been honor his whole life, other than a couple semesters. And Tina has been in retail, Walmart for the last 8 years and before that she was with the union working at Albertson's. I just got back actually from riding a bus from here in Southern Cal. to Mich. and then I drove back solo, it was a blast! She is doing ok, but almost 70 years old a little overweight and because of the weight has diabetes. I am trying to bring her back here to live and help me start a little second hand furniture and vintage toy store. Right now I am working from home and sell old 60's and 70's Hot Wheels and any old toys or whatever. I may go back to doing sheet metal if the store doesn't work out though. I found you because I had a newspaper clipping of you from when you were in court and stabbed your attorney I believe, that was hanging up and on top of the fridge, etc... and I would see it and wonder what happened after that day. So when I started using the computer, after a couple years I started to search for you and finally found you. How close are you to Riverside? Can you have visitors? I will write more soon, now that I think I can figure out how to do it. Take care man and tell me a little about your sentence next time. And I did look at a lot of your writings and correspondence, sounds like you are a good man. Good luck brother and remember that Tina and I still love you and hope for the best for you and your loved ones. Rik... Zap, bitch!
Hi Nicholas - play through the pain :) Glad to hear you've been able to play so much good stuff and that you have got your chapel privileges back. You being banned from it sounds like a strange situation? It must have been terrible when your friend/acquaintance died like that, and I'm guessing emotions were running high for a lot of people. I hope things stay more positive!
Hi Shawn - thanks for sharing your essay; I found it very interesting. I'm not super familiar with the 12 steps, so I'm curious as to why you say, "forgiveness is NOT an option, not now, not ever, and is something to be avoided at all costs". Is it because the person working the steps should not EXPECT forgiveness, or because you think the family members could never forgive the person? Or maybe a third meaning? Just curious. Of course we have no control over someone else's forgiveness, we can only do our part to make amends. But in the long run I think forgiving someone who has wronged you is something you do for yourself more so than the other person - and if you don't do it you are hurting yourself the most. So I like to think it's always a possibility...
Thanks for writing! I worked on the transcription for your post.
Haven't finished transcribing. You made this one really hard :-( it's so long, and has so many documents cited on it, numbers and all. You don't need all that, you're not in court, your readers are not looking for proof of what you say. We know the justice system sells prisons as places meant for correction, but deep inside everyone's head, it's a revenge thing. You messed up with us, so nowyou'll be deprived of your freedom. Don't feel too bad though, you get some art supplies, three meals a day and a place to live, I know people who can't afford half those things. I have a hard time affording them, I work every day for far too many hours and sometimes I can't buy enough food fro three meals a day, my molar broke and I can't afford a dentist, so there's daily pain one has to get used to, and I have never even copied in a school test. I know it's not the same thing, my point is freedom, in or out, is rarely ever about what you're able to do, what you have or what you lack, it's merely a mental states. :) Have a nice day!
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Hope to read more of your story, you give an interesting insight :).
So you were in the military. I was as well. The navy, that is. Well, Good Luck to you.
Haven't finished transcribing. You made this one really hard :-( it's so long, and has so many documents cited on it, numbers and all. You don't need all that, you're not in court, your readers are not looking for proof of what you say. We know the justice system sells prisons as places meant for correction, but deep inside everyone's head, it's a revenge thing. You messed up with us, so nowyou'll be deprived of your freedom.
Don't feel too bad though, you get some art supplies, three meals a day and a place to live, I know people who can't afford half those things. I have a hard time affording them, I work every day for far too many hours and sometimes I can't buy enough food fro three meals a day, my molar broke and I can't afford a dentist, so there's daily pain one has to get used to, and I have never even copied in a school test. I know it's not the same thing, my point is freedom, in or out, is rarely ever about what you're able to do, what you have or what you lack, it's merely a mental states. :)
Have a nice day!