Hello again. It is friday evening and I sit here at home in the dark reading posts on this blog. I would like to correct one misconception. I did not tell my son that his cousin was gay to trick him into coming out. His cousin was gay and had finally told his family. He has had a very difficult time with it and ended up on drugs and has been in and out of rehab. In his late twenties he has no idea how to care for himself and he spends much of his time out of his mind. He recently threw a concrete block through his mothers car window. He is now in jail and may spend a couple of years in prison. His trial is coming up. His mother has tried to help him over the years. She paid for him to go to school for specialized training and she has taken him in several times. She bought a business for him and ended up having to sell it because he could not make a go of it. She has finally given up and told him that he cannot stay with her anymore. She is afraid of him because when he is on drugs he is completely out of his mind and get aggressive and abusive to get his way. I had thought for some time that my son was gay and when he finally told me about it I told him I loved him regardless of what he does or how he lives his life. When I bought a house two years ago all I could think about was being able to leave something for him. A place to go. A place to live when he leaves prison. I have never had any doubts that my son is very intelligent. He is making a difference for other people even while in prison. I have known all of his life that he was going to do aomething very important some day. I knew it more than I knew how to breath and he is on his way to doing that even from the depths of hell where he has been for a while now. My son thinks that I wrote something on here and that I tried to hide who I was. After the prison returned my letters and books that I sent I was afraid he would not get what I wrote if they knew it was me. So I wrote enough to let him know that it was me but to assure he would get the post. There were times that he went through traumatic events while being transferred all over the country. I have tried to visit but the officials always tell me no. I am not sure why they will not let me visit. The entire time he has been in for the last charge I have not been allowed to visit. I signed up on a web site where families post information about their own family members that are in prison. I was hoping that someone would help me figure out who to talk to that could help me get a visit.
I am doing well, and hope that very, very soon, you will be doing far better. I think it was far earlier than '87 that I saw you, but my memory from that time is, unfortunately, not the best. Just for the record, I was never with Bobby...hahaha. Just the thought makes me laugh. lolol. I am back in contact with quite a few peeps from back then and didn't realize just how much I missed all of you until I found you all again. I stay in contact with your oldest who, by the way, is the spitting image of you. I just wish he wasn't all the way in Bakersfield. Scot and my son, Kyle get on pretty well. It warms my heart to see them together. I spend time with the Creamers, Mari Lane, of course Delphi, Billy Dyson and a few others. Funny, I ran into Midget of all people and he told me how to reconnect. I would promise to write the old fashioned way, but again, unfortunately, I am not really the pen to paper type. This works better for me. lol. Sending love and support always.
Thanks for writing! I finished the transcription for your post.
Your letter to your son was very moving. You are a great dad and it is clear that you have gained a lot of wisdom over the years. I am a father myself and I believe very strongly that your approach of being open with your kids, allowing them to go through the difficult emotions they are going through, and making clear, like you said, that they can come to you with anything and that you will always respond is so important. It must be incredibly hard to be separated from them, but I also know that you are doing right by them as best as you can.
RSS
Your letter to your son was very moving. You are a great dad and it is clear that you have gained a lot of wisdom over the years. I am a father myself and I believe very strongly that your approach of being open with your kids, allowing them to go through the difficult emotions they are going through, and making clear, like you said, that they can come to you with anything and that you will always respond is so important. It must be incredibly hard to be separated from them, but I also know that you are doing right by them as best as you can.