JT

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  • A very wise client of mine, from a few years ago, once said of her 'incident' (that put her in prison) - that she had to remind herself everyday that she had already forgiven herself for what happened. And then she moved on with her day. I think that, over ...
    on Comment Response by Tracy L. Judy July 3, 2013
  • Then don't be embittered! (I'm not suggesting that you are - just responding to what someone can do when they are caught up in the system). I've worked in prison as a counselor. I know how bad the system can be - but I have to say that I cared ...
    on Comment Response by Johnny E. Mahaffey July 4, 2013
  • Some prisons let the inmates have ipods (they purchase them off of the canteen). I know that the prison here in Florida let the women borrow small radios (only, they said, so they could listen to a local religious program -- the reception was so bad that was *almost* all ...
    on Look Who's Back by Michael Lloyd Young July 11, 2013
  • Do you write to them? I have read through your posts several times and I wanted to write how impressed I am by the hard work that you are doing. You face your past with real bravery. Most people are unable to do this. You take responsibility not just for ...
    on Untitled by Daniel Womack July 12, 2013
  • This statement ("Incest usually occurs among the poorest and least educated members of society") has no basis in fact. Incest happens in families from all socioeconomic backgrounds. So does sexual abuse. It has nothing to do with money or intellect. I read this following statement as equally problematic: "So you ...
    on Father-Daughter Sex by Kyle De Wolf July 14, 2013
  • Sure, there is always some argument about the 18 year old and the 16 year old. But that's not what I'm talking about. You will have to explore this issue more fully (and read up on the literature) in order to get some perspective about what happens to these kids ...
    on Father-Daughter Sex by Kyle De Wolf July 14, 2013
  • Congratulations on being out!! Take very good care. It's hard to put things together 'out here.' Go slow and get as much support as you need. Good luck! I hope you check in to say how you are doing, JT
    on Wind Tunnel by Brandon Green July 24, 2013
  • You want to know if you should sign away your parental rights? What does she want you to sign? I guess part of the question is, do you have a choice? Personally, I think that it's always best to have an open arrangement. You should request that you can have ...
    on To; Women Who Can Appreciate a Real Man! by Hakeem D. Holley July 26, 2013
  • In my experience, it's so hard to tell about medical care in prisons. They often do offer adequate (and sometimes even good) care. But, when they don't, there is no way to tell. There is no accountability in the system because it is so closed. You'd be surprised how common/how ...
    on A Brief History of Shirleyworld - The Madness Journals - Chapter III by Timothy J. Muise Aug. 5, 2013
  • Just give them your love 'in the here and now' - even if it isn't what you want (that it's not enough). Because it IS enough. When you give all that you have, that's love. j
    on Father's Day by William McKenzie Aug. 11, 2013
  • You will always be their Dad. In the age of the internet, it's so much easier to reach out. Just offer what you can - even if it's just what you say in these posts. When you offer what you can - it's enough - because it's all that you ...
    on Hello: My Name Should Be Dad by Johnny E. Mahaffey Aug. 12, 2013
  • I signed the petition that went to the Gov. supporting the strike. I also follow this story on the news everyday. I'm worried for the strikers - and impressed by their resolve. I wish there was more that I could do. It's a terrible situation - and a terrible system. ...
    on Tune of Injustice by Richard Garcia Aug. 18, 2013
  • I think there was obvious racism in the way that TM was profiled. And, Zimmerman probably scared him. And, Zimmerman shouldn't have had a gun. And, he didn't need to get out of the car. That said, I don't know that TM didn't turn around and jump Zimmerman. If he ...
    on My View of the George Zimmerman Murder Case by Richard Stevenson Aug. 22, 2013
  • I know. I look up the news everyday (online) and the misinformation is disturbing. There have been a few 'good' stories - factual ones - but they are few and far between. I've signed the petition going to the Gov and send my support!
    on Mass Starvation by Bobby Villado Aug. 23, 2013
  • Those programs are free. Write to a local buddhist group and see if they would come out to your prison. Is there a group coming out now? I've run a Buddhist program in the past :).
    on A Mindful Approach to Prison Reform by Daniel Labbe Aug. 24, 2013
  • When you write to the counselor, let her know that you want to offer what you can through letters. If the state has custody, then they can decide if you having some contact will be of help. The truth of a 16 year old is that they probably won't be ...
    on Sunday August 5, 2013: 3:45pm - Listening to "My Immortal", by Evanescence by Robert Pezzeca Sept. 2, 2013
  • Well, just my opinion then, but no - of course not. Why should you give up your parental rights? If there was a good reason....well, then she'd need to come up with it. And then you could think about it carefully. But if there isn't.....naw - he's your son. He ...
    on Comment Response by Hakeem D. Holley Sept. 6, 2013
  • It will be permanent, but like all things - it is up to you to make the best of it. I don't mean that lightly. When you finally leave prison, you will have a lot of adjusting to do. But over time, as you make you way in the world ...
    on Journal Entry # 594 - Kidding I Don't Know What Number It Is by Heather Alyce Dison Sept. 16, 2013
  • I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. Have they sent you out to the Doctor (or are they treating it 'in house?' Find out all you can if they send you out. What 'stage' is it? What treatment are they offering. Do you have any support outside prison ...
    on News Front by James Collins Sept. 16, 2013
  • I think that there might be some change in California - I've been following what has happened in the last few months there. I have hope that the hearings will lead somewhere (something has to change). j
    on Look Who's Back by Michael Lloyd Young Sept. 16, 2013
  • Daniel: These are very good goals. Make sure that you have lots of support and a good transition plan. It's hard once you get back out there - stay focused. There will be lots of things that will try to pull you back (you already know this) and lots of ...
    on An Apology And A Promise by Daniel Labbe Sept. 21, 2013
  • There are a lot of strong feelings about gay men in prison, I know. I also know that some of the gay men can be pretty out there with their sexuality - and few readers of these forums would not understand how hard it is to try to avoid their ...
    on The Gay Issue by Nathaniel Lindell Sept. 23, 2013
  • David, Are you in solitary now? What state are you in? What can you do to get out of solitary? Is there anything?
    on Comment Response by David Troupe Sept. 25, 2013
  • Marcus: Do you have a religious tradition that's important to you? I ask because if you do - you could write to the temple, church (what-have-you) and they usually have someone who could help serve in this capacity. I think your idea is great and one that most folks need ...
    on Still Seeking Mentors by Marcus T. Rogers Jr Sept. 27, 2013
  • I don't know whether you'll get what you want from admin. Frankly, from some of the press they put out I doubt it. But I do believe that some change is coming. The hearings will help. And there is legal pressure from the courts. It's a terrible thing that you ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña Sept. 27, 2013
  • I wanted to add that you should write about SHU's - exactly how big the cell is and how often you get outside to the, um, yard. When was the last time you saw the grass, sun. Have you walked outside in the last few years? Folks here on this ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña Sept. 27, 2013
  • Yes, I followed the story on the internet. I have a great deal of respect for what those men did. It's really amazing, when you think about it, they organized that from inside a supermax. I don't know what will happen once the hearings start, but it's a *start* and ...
    on Dear Citizens by Bobby Villado Sept. 29, 2013
  • No, I disagree. MC needs to take responsibility for her behavior. She did what she did (mimic porn and present it on TV) and she is responsible: if she's mimicking porn, then she's a porn 'actress'. That's what she is. She can't just say - it's not me, it's society. ...
    on What's the Ruckus? by Bobby Villado Sept. 29, 2013
  • I emailed a link of this page to a writer at the Globe. I hope they find it interesting. I think that someone needs to run the numbers on Josh Wall. There was considerable press when he was being considered for the job. Lots of protests. Someone needs to 'run ...
    on Good Men Are Dying In Prison Does This Serve The Welfare Of Society by Timothy J. Muise Oct. 3, 2013
  • The MMPI is indeed a discredited piece of psychobabble. But, it is a validated psychometric instrument that psychologists love - it's in all the text books. I am sorry to say, it's not going anywhere. Anyway, I just wanted to add my 2cents - since I've written a psychometric instrument ...
    on In Memory of It All by Chuck Thompson Oct. 5, 2013
  • I understand where you are coming from, in terms of your ability to make decisions as a teen regarding sex. But the thing is, if a 14 year old came up to you - now - would you be interested in protecting his welfare? As adults, we all have that ...
    on Needs to Analyze Situation Carefully by Jennifer Johnson Oct. 7, 2013
  • Actually, the appointment of Josh Wall was political. Have you read up on his appointment? There are many advocacy groups in MASS that do not agree with his appointment and his decisions -- and want his ouster. I think it's entirely within reason to call for change. Whether it comes, ...
    on Denial Of Parolee W/ (5) year "Set Back" - Frank Soffen by Timothy J. Muise Oct. 10, 2013
  • You are in a reasonably good position - though there will be lots of other factors that will play into the decision. Some good (reasonable) some are just idiosyncratic - and may be related to who knows what. But what is good is that the GAL and the therapist/counselor at ...
    on Sunday August 5, 2013: 3:45pm - Listening to "My Immortal", by Evanescence by Robert Pezzeca Oct. 13, 2013
  • I'm glad you saw that as support :). You ask if people can change and the answer is of course they can. They do all the time. And of course violent offenders change. So can non-violent offenders. I've seen it happen many times :). I think most people deserve second ...
    on An Apology And A Promise by Daniel Labbe Nov. 6, 2013
  • They posted some of the hearings on youtube and it was really impressive to hear people talk about change. Also, the legislators were really supportive. I was surprised at how strongly they worded their comments. Prison officials left the meeting before the families spoke. That was disappointing to see. Keep ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña Nov. 10, 2013
  • They can produce all of this paperwork to justify the SHU's - make them seem pretty, important - even necessary. It's all a whitewash. Just plain nonsense. No one deserves what you are living through. Did you read the proposal in California - architects will not participate in the construction ...
    on Pelican Bay(shu) Photograph, Canteen List And Menu by Pablo Piña Dec. 2, 2013
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. JT
    on Saddest Day Of My Life by Pablo Piña Dec. 2, 2013
  • I totally agree. She's young and has a lot of growing up to do. It's hard enough finding yourself - but she is doing that with a team of handlers and fans who are hanging on every word. It's real (in that it's her real life), but it's not *real*. ...
    on What's the Ruckus? by Bobby Villado Jan. 17, 2014
  • I agree, the press was pretty bad. There were a few in depth stories on the alternative press (and even a few on some mainstream magazines) - but much of it was garbage. The really hopeful thing is that some of the reps. out in California really get it. And ...
    on Dear Citizens by Bobby Villado Jan. 17, 2014
  • I think the next hearings are soon (I have to check the internet to see if they have been published). It is a long time coming....and (you already know this!) when the change comes it will be another step down program. (Unless there is a court remedy). (That's my take ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña Jan. 17, 2014
  • If you have family that can be a support - a visiting resource - that might be enough. She will receive some support after she turns 18. In most states - If she is in school and wants to take college classes, for instance, she will get support. She will ...
    on Sunday August 5, 2013: 3:45pm - Listening to "My Immortal", by Evanescence by Robert Pezzeca Jan. 19, 2014
  • There is a lot that you have written and I've been thinking about how to respond. I'm pretty sure I can't do a good job of this - you have written so much - and there would be so much to write back. But I want to try - you'll ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña March 3, 2014
  • I think there IS honor in putting it all down, too. I guess I'm just looking from the outside - and I see honor in what you are doing - the things that are good, caring (of your family and friends) - and positive. Urging kids to make good decisions ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña March 3, 2014
  • I am not someone given to fighting - so I don't know what it feels like to have all of that energy in life. But I DO know what it's like to be angry and feel like you are right. I can feel very angry and very self righteous! And ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña March 3, 2014
  • The first thing I thought of when I read your post was when to put things down. I kind of remembered the example of Chief Joseph (perhaps you remember the movie: From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more). The thing is, he never stopped fighting. He ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña March 3, 2014
  • Anyway, it occurs to me that there is great honor in making this decision. If he had continued to fight - continued to be the warrior that he was for all of his life - what would he have contributed to our evolving respect for native american culture? He would ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña March 3, 2014
  • There is only so much you can do. Besides, it's ok to be angry and hurt. The truth is - there is much to be angry and hurt about. The problem is getting stuck in it - you know - really stuck. And you don't know that this will happen. ...
    on Sunday August 5, 2013: 3:45pm - Listening to "My Immortal", by Evanescence by Robert Pezzeca March 6, 2014
  • Bethanie11 Yes, things happen in prison and it can be dangerous. But most men I know (I worked with folks in prison) learned ways to avoid problems. Especially as they got older. Or they didn't. It's true that you can't control anyone else. But you can control yourself and there ...
    on Update by Ronald W. Clark, Jr March 15, 2014
  • A copy of the posting guidelines is here: https://betweenthebars.org/about/guidelines/
    on The Verdict by Derrick Tucker April 14, 2014
  • I think you have moved? I looked up your name online and it looks like you are at another prison? I'm glad of that. I wasn't sure how quickly things would change - or even if they would. I hope that you are close to your family, that would be ...
    on The Pelican Bay SHU Hunger Strike Has Officially Ended by Pablo Piña May 19, 2014
  • Those are so complicated! I see myself as a feminist (I remember when it was a good way to describe yourself!). And I know that lots of people say that women who do stuff like that are really being feminists - but I've worked with lots of folks who did ...
    on What's the Ruckus? by Bobby Villado May 19, 2014
  • This is in reference to the post above. Below, I am linking to the community guidelines. In it, it asks that people who post refrain from "personal attacks" and "hate speech." It sounds like you have strong opinions against someone else who has posted. It seems to me that you ...
    on PA Budget Woes by Robert Pezzeca July 21, 2014
  • I'm so sorry to hear this. I had hoped that you would do well. If you want an opinion, though, I have to say that they should have given you more support (did they give you any?). After all those years in solitary, it was bound to be hard. I ...
    on Comment Response by Pablo Piña Aug. 22, 2014
  • I wanted you to know that the strong, courageous young woman who posted to you, left a link to her photo. She is beautiful. She looks eccentric (in an artsy way - just as she described). Almost a bit 'Marilyn Monroe-y' (that's how I see it ;). But much more ...
    on Support The Truth by Daniel Labbe Oct. 14, 2014
  • I'm sorry for the delay. I'm not sure what is happening with the site. It seems as though things are uploaded (your letters) and sent out once every two weeks or so. I know that my response to you waited three weeks to go out - they originally thought that ...
    on Comment Response by Pablo Piña Oct. 19, 2014
  • Your daughter is a teenager. This means that she is struggling with the same things that all teens struggle with. On top of that -- there is a whole lot more, of course. I do not want to speculate about it on a public forum for a variety of reasons ...
    on thoughts And Questions Of A Father No More by Daniel Labbe Oct. 23, 2014
  • I just checked back to see that my response to you is still here (and not yet sent). I posted it 4 weeks ago (tomorrow). Hopefully, they'll send out the mail soon. I'm not sure why there is such a delay. I did look online and saw that you went ...
    on Comment Response by Pablo Piña Nov. 15, 2014
  • To be honest, one of the things you might want to evaluate is how you present yourself on these blogs. You write a lot about wanting to have explicit letters with a female penpal. You also make requests for photos of women who are not fully clothed and talk about ...
    on I Need Somegood Advise.... by Joel M. Cliett Feb. 8, 2015
  • I can't find any information to validate some of what you write about (drug-wise) - despite looking for quite some time. I know a bit about psychopharmocotherapy - and, of course, I know that all drugs alone or in combination can cause dramatic reactions. Even a simple antidepressant. However, you ...
    on Press Release by Timothy J. Muise April 7, 2015
  • TK You cannot just bring food to a prison - it's not a matter of means but of process. All prison food goes though a series of approvals at the state level - and multiple committees right on down to the individual prison (everything must meet certain guidelines). You're best ...
    on What Goes On In This Prison Called Pulask (Food) by Jennifer Johnson May 26, 2015
  • Had he been involved in child porn or any other illegal activity - it would not have made what you did right or honorable. I'm going to quote one thing you wrote 'out of context,' because it's the only thing that I have read that really makes sense. You wrote ...
    on Why Did I Do It? by Nathaniel Lindell Aug. 14, 2015
  • This is a double post (a computer error) - so I'm deleting this duplicate. JT
    on Why Did I Do It? by Nathaniel Lindell Aug. 14, 2015
  • http://aaronline.org/ They were just giving out general advice (about those agents listed on the association of author's representatives, inc.). This is a reputable site and screens out agents who are scams (there are many out there). If you want to publish a short story, you don't need (and shouldn't try ...
    on Begging For Help by Donny Welch May 18, 2016
  • I've worked with hundreds of inmates over the years, women and men - and none of them want to die behind bars. That's their greatest fear. They don't care at all about the circumstances that they find themselves in when they are released. If they are infirm and are in ...
    on Rare Meeting With... by Timothy J. Muise Sept. 18, 2016
  • What do you do? You continue to love them and wait. Sometimes children (and adults) make mistakes. You have to let them make those mistakes. Sometimes, there are consequences for those mistakes. In this case, she cannot have contact with you (and you cannot have contact with her). That's real ...
    on What do you do when your child betras you? by Robert Pezzeca Dec. 21, 2016
  • What kind of a program are you going to? I've never heard of someone paying for a sober house post prison in this fashion. They generally take someone for free for the first few weeks, and help you find employment. The idea is to help you become self-sufficient. When you ...
    on "Go Fund Me" draft by Timothy J. Muise March 26, 2017
  • This is really in reply to Tierra: You are so brave to have posted. I hope you have all the support and help you need. From what I can see - you have indeed 'handled' it very well. You have my respect, JT
    on Untitled by Michael McThune July 27, 2017

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